Log In

Home
    - Create Journal
    - Update
    - Download

Scribbld
    - News
    - Paid Accounts
    - Invite
    - To-Do list
    - Contributors

Customize
    - Customize
    - Create Style
    - Edit Style

Find Users
    - Random!
    - By Region
    - By Interest
    - Search

Edit ...
    - User Info
    - Settings
    - Your Friends
    - Old Entries
    - Userpics
    - Password

Need Help?
    - Password?
    - FAQs
    - Support Area


Tatum Donnelly ([info]ojandtostitos) wrote in [info]blueridgeau,
What had being in the closet ever done for her anyway? Besides make ger miserable, get her into situations that were bad news. It made her into a liar, to herself and everyone else. It was Michi, always Michiko from the minute they met, and it had been Mack before her. Her parents knew it, had seen it in her, and she knew that was why they were so hard on her. The day that her parents forbid her to see Mack again, the fight that day, never left her for a minute even if she never told anyone about it. She could never forget the look on her father's face every time Mack was around, how he treated her. It was hate. It was why she had to work so hard to seem normal, to not stand out, to do what her father wanted. It was a coward's way out, easier than fighting it like Sera did, but Sera was stronger and she had Hunter to help her. It was so easy with Sam, they were already best friends, but she knew now that dating him was a coward's escape too.

She had let her parents, and her own weakness, take Mack away from her. Their confusing relationship, the way they couldn't stand each other but could never stay away from each other, was her father's fault. He got between them and separated them and Tatum was sure if that had never happened, they would be together right now. But they weren't, and she had met Michi and fallen for her, and she couldn't let the same thing happen with Michi now. She had to stop being afraid, and stop letting her father push away the girls she cared so much about.

"I wish I was like my sister, and just.. told them I was gay long ago and got away and never went back. Now they have two things to be ashamed of me for instead, pregnant dyke with no future. I was already the least favorite kid beside the other two," Tatum whispered weakly, feeling herself tear up along with Michi. She reached over, clumsily brushing a tear off the other girl's cheek with her palm. "You fucked up, but I fucked up more, and I don't.. know why you'd want me, but if you really do then.. well, baby, I do need you too. I need somebody, I can't do this alone. I'm so scared," she admitted finally, her tears breaking through again as she buried her face in the pillow. "I'm sorry too, I just.. I never wanted to hurt anybody, now I fucked up our whole life and Sam's and probably this baby's whole life because it's grandparents aren't even going to want it and it's uncle is an asshole and babies are expensive and.. and just everything. I wanna do right by all of us, but I'm scared. All I know how to do is drugs and sell drugs and play stupid video games, so what if i get some high score online, I'm not a mom."


(Read comments)

Post a comment in response:

From:
( )Anonymous- this community only allows commenting by members. You may comment here if you are a member of blueridgeau.
Identity URL: 
Username:
Password:
Don't have an account? Create one now.
Subject:
No HTML allowed in subject
  
Message:
 



scribbld is part of the horse.13 network
Design by Jimmy B.
Logo created by hitsuzen.
Scribbld System Status