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i'm just getting over the crud that i got saturday night/woke up with sunday morning,  but i think i gave it to nick :[ i feel bad about that, but hey, he can't call in sick since a) he's a manager and b) they'd be all "wtf, susan called in sick yesterday; why is nick calling in sick?" something tells me i need a new job. not because of where i work [although KFC isn't the most desirable place of employment], but because i'd much rather have nick and no job or a job somewhere else then the job at KFC but not be able to be more open about me and nick's relationship. that's the only problem with me and him right now -- that, despite how much we like each other [and it's a great deal on both our parts], we can't really start dating because, technically, i work for him. it wouldn't be so much of a problem if his step-dad, bill, didn't work for muy brands as an operations manager.  yeah, that's the one thing standing in our way right now. lame, right? two people who're both of age, relatively mature semi-adults can't date because of his DAD. well, step-dad. whatever. it's all the same.

we've become a lot closer lately. it's a little weird but awesome all at the same time -- i'm so not used to opening up to people about stuff, especially my feelings since i usually think that it'll just be better if i keep my damn mouth shut and don't try to complicate a situation. but with nick, he really makes an effort to pull me out of my shell, to get me to tell him what i'm thinking. frank never did that -- i would say "nevermind" and it would be done. but all nick wants from me is honesty, for me to tell him what i was going to say, no matter how much it might've hurt him or made me look bad. we've been pissed off at each other before, but still managed to let each other cool down and work it out. that's a big thing with him -- he told me from the beginning that we can fight and get mad at each other and not be afraid to hurt the other one's feelings as long as we're able to work it out. i LOVE that. i really do. i want someone who isn't afraid to tell me how it is, no matter whether it's good or bad. i NEED that kind of brutal honesty sometimes. i need the fun in my life that he's given me for almost the last year since i've known him [when i mentioned that we'd known each other almost a year the other day, he went, "holy shit, it's been that long?" yeah, we've known each other since last march... almost a year]. i need... him. the way he makes me feel, the things he does for me, the way he makes me laugh... all that shit. that's what i need.

:sigh: i'm such a softie.