I've gotta bust you out of here somehow...

Time:

03:36 pm

I've been wanting to write how I feel for a long time. I've been
blocked. SO blocked. It's not that I can't write, I just can't capture
what I feel.

Weird things make me cry lately. Last night I
watched A Walk To Remember, and bawled. Literally. SOBBED. The entire
movie...and I don't cry in movies. I read Catcher in the Rye this
afternoon (which is my fall back activity when i have nothing else to
do), and I feel so much like Holden. And I started to cry. I love him,
and I love that growing up hurts him in the way that it does. I love
that he feels that. So I cried. Because growing up hurts. And I feel
blind. Then I went to Starbucks, and I saw a father tying his
little girl's shoes, and that's when I really felt it...that's when I
really felt my heart ache. My eyes just filled with tears. I think
that it was just that one gesture of so much love. It was the way he
tied her shoe, and the way he held her hand when they left. It was the
most innocent, beautiful thing that I have ever seen. I don't know
what has happened, but over the past few weeks my heart has softened
in a way that I don't know how to write about.

comments: 2 comments

January 16th, 2008

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