"This is the proving ground, as the heat begins to rise..."

So please, tell me what I was thinking. How do I look someone in the face who is obviously concerned and completely not say what I'm feeling. It was like there was a hole being burned through me, but it somehow felt just fine. I don't like the distress in my mind. I don't like having conflicting feelings in my mind, either. I don't like having forks in the road, and there's no such thing as following intuition, etc with this. I'm just being stupid. But that's not unusual. I think I should abandon all of that. These thoughts are sometimes too much with everything else I have going on.

mood: indifferent