First Tarot Reading

2008-03-31T11:44:16Z

I did my first Tarot reading tonight with a little of Susie's help. As many of my friends know, I had a falling out with Danielle(best friend of 14 years). A few nights ago, I had a nightmare and I remembered the key details to it. I know that the dreams/nightmares you remember most are the ones that mean something. There was a message.

I basically was with this boy in my house and he had tried to rape me despite I told him no. I screamed for my parents and then found myself clinging to my dads arm, crying, cause I had been raped by someone. Next thing I knew, he was stalking me, everywhere I went, he was there too. I found myself on a class trip to Disney World and I was clinging to one of the female chaperones, trembling with fear, and he continued to stalk me, no matter where I went.

I was talking to Susie about it and we were only able to pinpoint I was afraid of something. But we couldnt quite figure out what it was and where the rape scene fit in. So I suggested we consult her tarot cards but since her cards weren't downstairs, I suggested mine long as she helps me since this would be my first reading. We used This set-up for the reading(the celtic cross).

(They dont mind that I take photos of them. I had asked them long before now so they gave me permission. :3 And if anyone is curious, I own the White Cat deck.)

1. Knight of Chalices
2. Chalices(2)
3. Chalices(4)
4. The Tower
5. The World
6. The Hierophant
7. Wands(8)
8. The Stars
9. Queen of Swords
10. Swords(9)

Basically 1 and 2 represent bribary and someone trying to coax me. From my current situation, that would be Susie, bargaining with me to talk to Danielle. 4 and 6 represent my fall-out with Danielle and the fact I've had a hard time expressing myself to her for years because shes become so sensitive to every word people say. But its telling me I need to open up to her so she knows how I feel. 3 and 5 represent the fact I have my priorities not quite in order and I need to get back to reality on certain things. Again, probably leaning towards Danielle...meaning I need to get this squared away with her before moving on to other things. 7 and 8 represent myself, being pelted with everything at once and being stressed out and PMSing. In a sense, I'm turning my back on problems with Danielle that I should be facing and fixing. 10 basically says I'm scared. I'm too scared of the future. and maybe I am scared to lose her despite I put up a front. But its warning me to not hang onto those fears, to not let them hold me back from the things I can quickly turn around into my favor. More or less the saying "Hope for the best, prepare for the worst" would describe it. 9 is telling me a message of basically what 10 is telling me. I have a fear relevant. I'm afraid, once again, of losing Danielle forever and possibly also afraid to leave her behind when I go the airline academy.

So it all came together. I realized what the dream meant. The boy who raped me was fear. He inflicted fear upon me to hold me back while I clung to those who weren't afraid or affected by fear. And fear was haunting/stalking me, waiting for me to try and let go so he can attack me again so I can continue clinging to others and not doing the things I normally would enjoy.

After this reading, I felt relieved somehow. Knowing what was going wrong, what the nightmare was trying to tell me, and knowing what I must do to solve the issue currently. This first reading was the very first step into finally bonding with my cards and I know when I do leave for the airline academy, I will take them with me(as well as a little figure of bast too). And now I cant help but smile.

Now a question, other than your thoughts on this, what was your first reading like and/or what was the first steps you took to bond with your first deck of tarot cards?

pagan @ 2008-01-18T03:21:00

2008-01-18T08:23:02Z

This made me really REALLY happy to see.

Scribbld's Pagan Community

First Tarot Reading

pagan @ 2008-01-18T03:21:00