♪ WHAT AM I SUPPOSED TO DO?

:|

2009-12-06T02:57:25Z

Life is good.

I think.

:\

2009-06-08T01:41:08Z

I thought I had something to write; but then I realized I really didn't have anything to report. I've actually had some really conflicting emotions about things lately and honestly, I just don't care enough to try and sort them out. Call it apathy, I don't care, but I'd rather just watch it pass me by then trying to understand it. I almost feel like it's not worth wasting time over anymore.

Le sigh.

I'm glad it's finally warming up though. Here's to feeling like a human, again.

DX

2009-03-28T00:11:38Z

Fuck my life. I'm so tired.

:x

2009-02-10T06:56:48Z

Work today is brutal. I'm so bored. I wonder if I've already mentally checked out. Word is spreading around here that I'm almost gone. That's the one reason I wasn't telling anyone that I handed in my notice; because there are idiots here that I would rather they not fucking know. And this place LOVES its gossip.

So this is a pure example of the fact that I only told my superiors, asked them to keep it on the DL, then one of my friends overheard one of my bosses talking about it, so she asked me about it. She's my friend so I didn't lie to her, and asked her to keep it under the biggest lock and key of her life. She wound up telling her man I guess, that I'm also friends with, which is fine because he doesn't work here, but then her man fucking told his friend that does work here! So this third-generation knowledge-armed friend now, ASKS me about it! "Hey Rubbie says you quit?" And I was like "GAK, YES BUT SERIOUSLY MAN, DON'T TELL ANYONE." He admitted that he told someone I used to be friends with (we had a falling out) which means that the information has precisely fallen where I specifically DID NOT WANT IT TO GO.

FUCKING GOSSIP.

Ugh, so that's that. Everyone probably knows now and I may just have fun with it if people start asking me directly. I'll just make shit up like; "Yeah, I joined the army." Or to someone else, "I'm moving to England." Or maybe even the classic old "I'm going back to school."

Hahaha, maybe I'll even tell someone I'm pregnant. I would love to see that spread like wildfire. Shit, this may just be a little bit fun now that I consider it...

:\

2009-02-06T00:29:59Z

I'm stupidly bored today. This week's gone by pretty fast though; and I'm not too sure why. It's really just been the same old day in and out. I finally went to the doc, and started feeling better. Looks like it's what Bones thought it might be. Oh well! I'll get through it.

Nothing's really been happening. I have T-minus 7 days of work left at this place until I start my new job. It'll be good times. I can't wait to be wearing casual clothes everyday.

No big plans for the weekend yet, although I'm sure I'll wind up plastered somehow. I have yoga tomorrow so I'll be working a lot today and hopefully not too much tomorrow. God damn this entry is boring, eh?

On the bright side, SPRING IS COMING! FUCK YEAH.

:)

2009-01-31T04:36:32Z

Stolen from healhorrorshow. Can't help it, I was bored.

List your 30 favorite bands/musicians (in no particular order) without looking at the questions, and then answer the questions using your list.

1. Red Hot Chili Peppers
2. Chevelle
3. Tom Petty & the Heartbreakers
4. Breaking Benjamin
5. Eve 6
6. Incubus
7. A Perfect Circle
8. Tinfoil Phoenix
9. Foo Fighters
10. Oasis
11. Blink 182
12. Hawksley Workman
13. Johnny Cash
14. Lil Wayne
15. T.I.
16. Maroon 5
17. Rise Against
18. Roxette
19. Tonic
20. Weezer
21. Against Me!
22. Akon
23. Audioslave
24. The Beatles
25. Coldplay
26. Default
27. Evan's Blue
28. Live
29. Nelly Furtado
30. Nirvana

1. How did you get into 29 (Live)?
I can remember my sister listening to them when I was young, so I disliked them out of spite to begin with. Then as I got older and heard more of what they had to offer, I thought it rocked hard. Throwing Copper melts my soul.

2. What was the first song you ever heard by 22 (Akon)?
Jesus, it must have been something at the bar. NO WAIT, it was totally off of Fight Night Round 3, "Never Gonna Get It" featuring a bunch of artists. So good. I love that I didn't like any of his mainstream shit to being with, cause now I feel I appreciate him so much more.

3. How many albums by 12 (Hawklsey Workman) do you own?
I borrowed two from a friend of mine, and obviously have more on my computer.

4. What is your favourite song by 5 (Eve 6)?
Promise, hands down. Anytime is great, too.

5. What is your favorite song by 15 (T.I.)?
Either "Whatever You Like" with Rhianna, or "Get Up" with someone else I can't remember.

6. Is there a song by 6 (Incubus) that makes you happy?
"I Wish You Were Here." It's just so damn sweet.

7. What is your favourite song by 10 (Oasis)?
Shit, this is hard. It's close between "Y'know What I Mean?" "Sueprsonic" and "The Importance of Being Idle."

8. What is a good memory you have involving 30 (Nirvana)?
Driving to the fucking Winter Fair with my friend and her family, trying to figure out all of the words to "Smells Like Teen Spirit" haha.

9. Is there a song by 19 (Tonic) that makes you happy?
"You Wanted More."

10. How many times have you seen 23 (Audioslave) live?
Nope, and I won't, seeing as how they're disbanded.

11. What is the first song you ever heard by 26 (Default)?
"Taking My Life Away"

12. What is your favourite album by 11 (Blink 182)?
"Feelin' This"

13. Who is your favourite member of 1 (Red Hot Chili Peppers)?
Don't make me choose, man. That's like picking a favourite kid.

14. Have you ever seen 14 (Lil Wayne) live?
I doubt SNL counts, haha.

15. What is a good memory involving 27 (Evan's Blue)?
Yeah, but I don't want to talk about it.

16. What is your favourite song by 16 (Maroon 5)?
Hard choice. "Harder and Harder to Breathe" probably.

17. What is your favourite album by 18 (Roxette)?
JOYRIDE. FUCK YEAH.

18. What is your favorite song by 21 (Against Me!)?
"Thrash Unreal."

19. What is the first song you ever heard by 25 (Colodplay)?
Not even sure, man. "Yellow" maybe? I didn't like it.

20. What is your favourite album by 2 (Chevelle)?
Um, probably "This Kind of Thinking Could Do Us In."

21. What is your favourite song by 3 (Tom Petty and the Heartbreakers)?
Fucking "Maryjane's Last Dance" fuckers.

22. What is your favourite song by 8 (Tinfoil Phoenix)?
"Ms Genova" if you can find this song, anywhere, FUCKING LISTEN TO IT.

23. How many times have you seen 17 (Rise Against) live?
None, but I had the chance to recently.

24. What is the worst song by 12 (Hawksley Workman)?
Not even sure. He's pretty artsyish so some of his shit can get weird.

25. What was the first song you ever heard by 28 (Live)?
Maybe "Lightning Crashes."

26. What is your favourite album by 7 (A Perfect Cricle)?
Probably "Emotive."

And that was another exciting rendition of my life, haha. Hello wine, what's up?

>:\

2009-01-19T22:16:35Z

There's at least five people I would straight-up slap in the mouth right now if given the chance. God the stupidity, it's literally blinding.

My roommate's getting upset with me... Hah, it's nothing serious, it's actually sort of cute. I really should go to the doc, but since those are stupid, I probably won't. But I'm beginning to at least acknowledge that there's something wrong.

Pink lemonade is the shiz.

You know what I love though? How fucking free I've felt lately. I'm not really weighed down with any worries, and I effing love it. Also I've discovered a delicious new album to play with. Maybe that's the reason for my high spirits. Good music really is all you need sometimes.

;_;

2009-01-13T08:07:12Z

WHY CHRONO TRIGGER? WHY?!

...

Needless to say, I've died. :( DARN THAT OCEAN PALACE. Dalton and his twin golems made short work of my level 35 team. It was a good run though. Now the challenge is going to be finding a PSX memory card before I become a glutton for punishment and start the whole game over again.

You know, the game is so much more entertaining when you name your characters ridiculous things. Seeing Taban shout "Shit! Where did she go?" to Lucca somwhow makes it worth it. Other highlights include my Marle talking about Robo when he gets beat up in 2300AD by the R-Series, "Penis got creamed!" or Kino talking about Ayla "Kino like Tits best." Haha. Oh man, I'm 23 going on 12...

Also, heck yeah new layout! danicalifornia! The header's still super lame, but at least this journal isn't Lametown Central Station anymore.

I should really upload that Yuna mood theme my friend gave me.

:(

2009-01-13T00:29:54Z

I'm feeling down today. I really wish I didn't; because I hate feeling down. I dislike feeling helpless. It's at times like this that I realize, hey, I'm always the one that's trying to make everyone else smile when they feel down, but... why can't I have the same success when it comes to the self?

I'm tired, and listless... I have next to no energy right now. I'm sure I'm coming down with a cold or something. I just wish it was spring outside. I miss the warmth of the sun.

Gah, I'm sounding too... bleh.

Colds are the worst.

8D

2009-01-08T17:59:02Z

Fuck yeah, you know what's awesome? Picking up a game again that you literally haven't touched in like, a decade. I started re-playing CHRONO TRIGGER recently, how great is that? This is seriously one of, if not the best, RPG storylines of my life. I freaking love Ayla. Schala too of course, but goddamn if her fate ever a sad one.

Anyway, the challenge of this? I have CT in the form of Final Fantasy Chronicles, the PSX version. So you know what that means? You need a PSX memory card in order to save shit. You know what I don't have? Oh yeah, you've got it. So literally, I am playing this game taking an annoying fucking risk, and not saving at all.

But I have to say, my party's averaging about level 21, and I just beat Magus for the first time in 600AD. I've already died and had to re-start once, but that was the first time I hit 2300AD. I swear to god though, if that Game Over screen flashes for me, I'll probably have a conniption.

Also, I bought a new pair of uggs yesterday. Fuck yeah, black crochet.

Calling in sick to play games is the best idea I had today.

:\

2008-12-21T21:09:03Z

Every time I'm ready to be over him, he comes back into my life somehow. He was in town this weekend, and we got together. He was only here one night (he was working in a small town two hours away) cause his flight was leaving in the morning. We didn't really do anything, just hung out, but I straight up told him I had deleted him from my phone because when I don't hear from someone in a month, I don't expect to ever hear from them again.

He was trying to re-iterate the fact that he's not "that type" of guy. I flat out told him I didn't trust him, but that it wasn't his fault. He laughed it off with a little bit of a "well, it has to be my fault..." But fuck man, I don't even know.

His birthday is Monday, so I guess I'll fire him some sort of greeting, but -- I have to make sure I don't put too much stock into this.

What a great ass though. Haha.

:(

2008-12-18T00:04:01Z

Well, a lot of shit sucks lately. You know what's even worse than having a huge crush on someone and not doing anything about it? Not being able to do anything about it. I'm probably just talking big right now because I know I won't do anything about it, but I like to think that if he was still here, I'd pursue it. But maybe that's just the naive part of me speaking. The part that doesn't want to believe that I've been too jaded to ever give that much of a damn ever again.

Blah blah blah. I hate love and boys. (But in actuality it's been years since I liked one like this. :\ )

It's waaaaaaaaaaay too fucking cold here right now. I swear to god, there's those warnings on the environmental channel right now that you're not supposed to expose skin outside for more than 10 minutes right now. My feet are fuh-reezing. I hate winter so much, and it hasn't even officially started yet, what the hell!

Oh yeah, and I totally scored LOZ:OoT's Master Quest the other day. Fuck yeah, it's been forever since I played that game.

Also, work sucks, but I have an interview tomorrow with an environmental company. Fingers crossed!

:|

2008-11-15T04:17:17Z

I swear I had something interesting to write about, and then I flat out forgot.

Today was an all right day, on the other hand. Um. Oh yeah, all right, well I'm going to some terrible bar that I hate more than anything tonight. Here's to drinking my face off and having a dynamite time!

I sort of hate myself for liking that new Kanye West song, by the way. It pretty much goes against the fibres of my being.