YOU WANT KNOW WHAT'S ANNOYING? NURSES. I CAN BLOODY WELL WRITE IN MY JOURNAL IF I WANT TO.

YOU WANT KNOW WHAT HURTS? GARGOYLES FALLING SMACK ON YOUR HEAD. I DON'T RECOMMEND IT. I REALLY DON'T.

YOU WANT KNOW KNOW WHAT I HATE? EARTHQUAKES. FUCK 'EM.

AND WHILE WE'RE ON THE SUBJECT OF EARTHQUAKES

WHERE THE BLOODY HELL ARE MY WIFE AND GNOME?