uchiha ][ ahihcu

equate @ 2009-11-20T19:56:00

2009-11-21T01:32:21Z

The absence of your name in Customs files for the last 59 days.

~~Europe. The Indies. The States. You wouldn't go beyond -~~

Itachi.

I shouldn't have to tell you what kind of corpse you are without my hatred there to animate it.

Are you lonely, running like a rat?

I should be a good brother by you. Let me. I'll find you a proper dead woman for a spiritual marriage: quiet, intelligent. Someone whose avenging ghost will tear you limb by limb both here and in the afterlife.

Don't worry. She can keep your bones, but I'll take your eyes. Family token, Itachi. ~~Blood of my blood who spilled my blood.~~ We do have good eyes.

Let's end it soon, shall we? It's beyond the point of incoherent monologues.

Your brother,

Sasuke.

-

:)

Hmmm.

A woman teasing out her spouse's innards.

It is a good day.

equate @ 2009-10-29T12:04:00

2009-10-29T16:37:42Z

OCT. 14, 2009

Dear Mr. Uchiha:

This letter is to confirm your investigation petition of OCTOBER 2009 .

As you are aware, property theft is a serious offense that the Tokyo Metropolitan Police Department Statistics Office has determined has a 9.51% probability of a favourable conclusion to the complainant.

The officer delegated to this investigation is MORITA KEICHIRO. His reports will be enclosed.

Thank you for your cooperation. Your safety is important to us.

Lt. Adachi Naomi
Tokyo Metropolitan Police Administration Office

OCT. 18, 2009

Mr. Uchiha:

My team and I are proud to inform you that our department has recently been awarded with two highly trained military dogs.

We believe this to be relevant to your pending search investigation, should the sought object contain a 45% or higher concentration of radioactive substances or narcotics.

Morita Keichiro
Tokyo Metropolitan Police Community Police Affairs Section

Dear Mr. Uchiha:

We will forward your second petition for a stalking warrant against CARMEN DEFUENTA to our Criminal Investigation Department.

Your safety is important to us.

Lt. Adachi Naomi
Tokyo Metropolitan Police Administration Office

Mr. Uchiha:

The unidentified object my team and I believe to meet the description of your phone has been confiscated as secondary evidence in a civil trial that the defendant claims will prove the existence of 'alien life force.' (Enclosed ref. court order #866-31.)

Under clause IIA.90.718, our search investigation loses priority to a pending litigation. We are obligated to cease our search for the duration.

Morita Keichiro
Tokyo Metropolitan Police Community Police Affairs Section

-

...

Ah. Karma.

Black Ericsson, 'equate' engraved in rōmaji on the side.

Compensation for its return.

[ooc: ...in which he tried to recover the cell phone he lost in a club and failed horribly. FHL. If you want your character to've found it in a club, go for it - only requirement is to make the discovery story as gd whacky as the above XD]

equate @ 2009-10-12T13:09:00

2009-10-12T18:45:49Z

Professor, in well lit, warm room, "Uchiha, find something remarkable."

Aaaa.

Two filters, contrast enhancement, a messed up shutter, eight hours in the rain. Plasticity.

It's pouring. My hands are freezing.

Remarkable?

An idiot forgetting his gloves.

Remarkably pathetic.

[ooc: k, people, so I fess up, I............ godmodded.............. the weather. It is hereby COLD and RAINING X( KEEP YOUR DOGS IN. THAT MEANS YOU, KIBA :D ]

equate @ 2009-09-17T15:01:00

2009-09-17T22:11:25Z

][ september

-

-

Tsk, tsk, tsk.

Counters. Tables. Walls. Couch. Chairs. Floor. Balcony sill. Over thirty flat, accessible, surfaces over which you could politely spread your legs in this apartment.

My pillow for Suigetsu's virginity?

Yamanaka, be fair. It was a good pillow.

...

Aaaaaa. When does school start...?

[ooc: rfue;oouewhi THEY DID IT IN HIS BLOODY BED, OKAY? Sob. He's totally tossing the sheets over his gd balcony SORRY KARIN YOUR NEIGHBOURS LOVE YOU. Aaaaaaand finding a picture to represent something OH SO DEEP AND MEANINGFUL about everyone's recent posts was DIFFICULT.]

e... ssay... whut.

2009-09-10T14:17:28Z

HELLLO AND WELCOME TO THE BANDWAGON DOMINION,

(Leave your hat and dignity at the door).

Kay. Since AUs run in the BDSM prone vein of OC building, this is where questions / comments / tl;dr about all and any of Sas'ke's stuuuuuuuuuuuuff goes. Can haz questions / answers / memes / bloody bullet lists - you can ask stuff, I can fumble awkwardly in the dark until you forget about it. I can also comment with the occasional personal addendum about random details I'll have established as his in-game preferences, because fml = fmm = fuck my memory.

/ in b4 Ashoree, shall backdate accordingly

equate @ 2009-08-28T01:05:00

2009-08-28T05:07:24Z

To Whom It May Concern,

Attached are the necessary medical leaves covering the past two months of academic absence. If they're too few, further documentation can be produced.

Department-use only requested.

Sincerely,

Uchiha Sasuke

Attachments:

cholera_leave.pdf 16 kb
syphilis_leave.pdf 20 kb
gingivitis_leave.pdf 15 kb
mononucleosis_leave.pdf 21 kb
cysts_leave.pdf 17 kb
sprainedankle_leave.pdf 22 kb
chronic_migraine_leave.pdf 18 kb

Your fifth message didn't come in either. I don't know what to tell you.

- Uchiha Sasuke.

The cat died unhelped.

Tragic.

[ooc: ummmm, all the e-mail stuff is online / private, sob. The forum post wouldn't be traceable to him, but. God. IF YOU WANNA HAVE A CHAR BID, OR SOMETHING, just make up a fake 'forum username' and... invent a comment, it might get fun XDDDD]