i met a hag yesterday. a very peculiar one.

zicks loi ox ceurdniz fo velo felick loi ox.

Dirk. I think you and I need to have Ludo take us out for some sweet treatment. Being a fancy famous quidditch bloke, I think he can get us a good time yeah? I forgot about my birthday. which was yesterday but whatever. I'm nineteen now. holy fucking shit yeah? lets go out.

I really do love ice cream. It is quite the wonder I haven't put on thirty pounds in the past few months though.


Did you hear the one about a book on voyerism?

If I eat any more ice cream, I think I might die.

Fantastic.