please don't slow me down if i'm going too fast

art

Sun, 28 Mar 2010 01:15:10 GMT

hey sasori is this artistic enough for you? or this?

i don't know what the hell the point of this shit is so it looks artistic to me. deidara even wrote stuff on it. i think you owe someone 100 bucks.

[private to sasori.]
and you owe me 100 too. i really made him mad.
[/end private.]

dumb thing

Sat, 30 Jan 2010 01:56:27 GMT

2853 signatures so far and i'm gonna get more. that's how hard i work but do i get promoted. no. who here has even close to that many signatures? i don't hear anything so i guess no one. yeah that's what i fucking thought.

i also got a roommate but i'm not taking a picture until he's been here for two weeks.

anyway i'm not in the mood for bullshit i had to update this for pr or something so anyone i hate DO NOT REPLY...

broked into.

Mon, 28 Dec 2009 22:01:13 GMT

my place got brokedn into again even though i don't know how. i had lots of locks on the door but now i have more stuff to make sure it won't happen again. i like having fans but stalkers who break into someone's apartment isn't cool ok. if your reading this thing stop because it'll make me hate you not want to give you stuff.

i got a lot of christmas presents....so thanks everyone who got me one. i never got so many before so it was nice and i'm gonna be getting a lot of extra money soon too so i'm gonna have a lot to add to the motorcycle fund. that means i'm gonna have one soon so i'm happy.

does anyone got experience with getting brokedn into? like i said i got some stuff set up so it doesn't happen again but i want other advice. but if you're gonna tell me to call the cops just don't say it because i'm not doing that. it was the same as last time so i know it was some weird fan. i'm famous enough for that to happen.

ok thanks.

edit: if you got advice about getting broken into make it private so no one but me and you can see.

to my fans

Tue, 08 Dec 2009 00:48:15 GMT

this time of the year people buy lots of presents. since everyone likes porn, it's a really good gift idea to give to someone. since i'm in so many different kinds you can get one of my movies for any occasion. like girls love best friend gay porn. i did that. guys like straight porn. i did that. i do lots of fetish stuff like leather and rough stuff too but i could be gentle too. that's why when you want to buy something for your mom or sister or brother or dad or even your grandparents it would be a good idea to buy something with naruto uzumaki in it.

this thanksgiving i had pizza and got some turkey at boston market since turkey is the one thing you're supposed to eat on thanksgiving. and i don't know what you're supposed to eat on christmas but i put lights up in my apartment. i like having them on when i go to sleep. since i'm talking about christmas i should say i'm paired up with izuna for the post cards. i've never seen her before but i think she might be fat. that's ok though i like fat people they're nice inside their hearts. i got paired up with other people too so please try to collect all of my post cards. i think they're gonna be worth a lot someday.

a lot of people have been writing to me about my apartment getting broked into but it's ok it didn't happen again and thanks. i'm free on christmas too so if anyone is having a party and wants me to work it i charge 20 50 bucks an hour but i'll stay for as long as you want with~~out any~~ some breaks. ok thanks.

birthday.

Wed, 07 Oct 2009 18:14:44 GMT

it's my birthday saturday.

shnappy.

Thu, 10 Sep 2009 01:35:12 GMT

sorry to everyone who wanted to see my seahorse. i can't bring him in anymore because he died. i'm getting him cremated so anyone can see his urn when i get it. if i had a desk at work i'd put it there but i don't so i'll put it on top of my tv.

don't ask how i am i'm fine.

[OOC: Since Kiba has been dropped (sob), Naruto just lost his bffle (who I'm making an NPC so the next Kiba doesn't have to take this backstory) and is upset and angry. Now his pet died. So if he's mean to everyone for a while that'd be why.]

hehe

Thu, 03 Sep 2009 05:14:37 GMT

i got my driver's license!!! that means if anyone has a car but they don't like driving i can drive you for free. that's a really good deal since it's free, so you should let me drive because i really like it and i'm good at it. ask the driving test guy. but since i gotta work if i tell you i can't drive you right now it's because i'm working ok.....so don't expect me to drop everything for you since i'm not even getting paid.

since i got a pass on my test i got a friend to celebrate and i really like him.

now business.

if your my fan and you wear size xxxl i got a shirt for you. i'll wear it on webcam and send it for a price, or i'll wear it in whatever way you want…or i can sign it. contact me here ok. i'll quote the price once you tell me what you want. i'm willing to do anything and i'm waiting for you.

update

Tue, 04 Aug 2009 00:13:36 GMT

[ooc note: Naruto would not have used an LJ cut.]

look i got a copy of the cover of my newest movie :) i guess they didn't put words on it yet but everyone should buy it since i know it's really good. i was in it so i know.

thanks for everyone who mailed me stuff.. i really liked that. sorry for the people who wanted to meet up i don't feel comfortable with that and i don't do birthday parties but i guess i could for the right price. i have to check if it's ok i do stuff like that since i'm a professional.

oh and say you burned a place on you...like your dick. is there something you can put on it...

hi

Sat, 11 Jul 2009 19:20:58 GMT

i've had it explained to me blogs are the way of the future for busnesses so they can avertise better but i'm not that happy about being told i have to update every couple weeks. it takes me forever to type. shouldn't the writers do this. they know who we are they write stuff for us so it's not like the public knows until we tell them who we are. did i just come up with a really good idea? i want a raise if i did.

ok my name is naruto. i'm 18. my favorite color is orange. my favorite food used to be burgers but now it's ramen. i wear a size 9 shoe but that doesn't mean my dick is small i'm just short. you can see my dick if you buy and watch my movies. i've been in a lot so far. their good. my hair is naturally blond but i bleach it out even more because i like it that way. i don't bleach my pubes that is natural.

if you like me you can send fan mail or money to [P.O. Box address].

and hi to everyone who works at feel good inc because i think you guys are the ones who use the blogs the most.

application;

Tue, 09 Jun 2009 06:46:25 GMT

Name: Naruto Uzumaki.
Age: 18
Sexuality: Naruto is bisexual, but doesn't have much sex off the job. He's never had a lover, and he's only had sex with men off screen (he's only ever had sex in prison, where there were no women). On the job, he'll have sex with whoever he's assigned to have sex with and has no real boundaries.
Role in company: Actor, barista. (Eventually I want him to take up writing too.)

Background History: Naruto was born to a young couple who lived in a small house with only one level, two bedrooms, and one bathroom. Some less-than-desirable characters on Naruto's father's side of the family lead to the couple taking Naruto's mother's last name: Uzumaki. They were happy, like many young couples with a new baby, and by the time Naruto turned one, his parents were trying for another baby. They were both photojournalists working for the local paper, neither well known but both talented. They promised Naruto a modest life filled with love and support. One day, while Naruto was at home with a babysitter, his parents went to the doctor to confirm a second pregnancy and on the way back home collided with another car. Naruto's mother was dead by the time the paramedics reached the scene, and his father died while being rushed to the hospital.

Being so young, neither of them had left a will, and their families bickered over their meager belongings. Naruto, still an infant and unaware of the great tragedy in his life, was placed in a Christian orphanage in a rural town in Nevada, the state he had been born in, to be coddled by overworked nuns who didn't like to see any child left behind. Naruto had a bad habit of crying all night long, drooling all over everything (and everyone), and chucking his toys as far as he could manage. As he got older, Naruto was one of the last children to stop gurgling and start saying words, but one of the first to pull himself up just about everything. Temper tantrums became a norm for him, and long after potty training he constantly wet himself, and just about every night, wet the bed. Though the nuns meant well, but weren't superwomen by any means (many of them were elderly, in fact), Naruto didn't get as much attention as he required and began to act out even more when his tantrums didn't get him anything but time out in a corner by himself. He would play tricks on the nuns, or on his peers, or would refuse to do his chores. The attention he got fueled him, but it was almost always negative. The older he became the more severe his punishments grew, most of which were corporeal paired with his privileges being taken away. He was the boy no one wanted to talk to at school and at home, and his grades impressed no one.

When he turned eight and no one even remembered his birthday, Naruto had just about had it. After sitting in his closet (since he shared a room with ten other boys) and crying to himself, Naruto got a great idea. An idea that would show everyone he was someone who couldn't be forgotten. The orphans usually ate breakfast and dinner together, and after dinner Naruto stole a book of matches and hid them beneath his mattress as soon as he could. As usual, he got ready for bed when they were required to and settled down in his bed to pretend to sleep. Not according to plan, Naruto actually did fall asleep, but woke up in the middle of the night to a darkened, silent room. He glanced at the clock to see it was around two AM, and decided he could go through with his plan anyway.

Grabbing the matches, he tiptoed out of his room and went downstairs to the sitting room where there were large, heavy curtains. It took a few tries, but Naruto managed to get one of the curtains to catch the flame. The orphanage had fire drills every Friday, so Naruto was confident everyone would know how to get out of the burning building safely. Leaving the curtain burning, he went back upstairs and climbed into bed, feeling satisfied with himself.

Chaos ensued. Eventually, the fire began to spread. Many of the fire alarms had long since run out of battery, and the ones in the back of the large building finally picked up the smoke after the fire had gotten extremely large. Despite the general panic, most of the nuns and orphans were able to get out unharmed. Some were burned, but not fatally. There, however, was one death: the eldest nun, and the one who dealt with Naruto the most often.

Investigation into the cause of the fire revealed it had been intentionally started, and Naruto had re-hidden the book of matches beneath his mattress, which were also found. After he was questioned relentlessly, alone, with police, Naruto yelled that he had been the one to set the fire, and the old nun had deserved that she got for forgetting his birthday.

As per Nevada law, any child changed with murder was to be tried as an adult, and after a little over three years of going to court, waiting, going to court and waiting again, Naruto was sentenced to ten years in prison. All of the character witnesses had reflected badly on Naruto, saying he was stupid, a troublemaker, and out of control. One little girl who had been burned in the fire said she was glad they all had forgotten Naruto's birthday, then burst into tears on the stand. Even so, the judge had ruled for a shorter sentence than would have been doled out to an older person.

Naruto was eleven when he entered prison, and for the first three and a half years he was more or less kept to himself. Guards were constantly escorting him around, and he was basically isolated from other prisoners, even though he ate with them and exercised with them. Prison wasn't a breeze for him then, and he did struggle with being in such a bleak and negative environment without anyone to depend on (the guards who watched over him didn't want to talk), but it was peaceful for him for the most part because he was looked after so closely. Naruto retreated into himself, reading the books the prison offered (which consisted mostly of The Bible) and making origami. He also wrote stories about young boys who lived happy and carefree lives with their mommies and daddies.

Things changed when he was fifteen and he was no longer offered a guard to escort him around. One day, he was thrown into the yard by himself, still small and scrawny, but less likely to cause backlash from the public if he were abused. Some prisoners ignored him, some picked on him, and some were downright hostile to him – and everyone else. It was around that time Naruto had to learn to be tough and take shit from nobody; he had to assert himself even though he was about two feet shorter than everyone else around him. But Naruto didn't gain respect in prison, and he was put into the infirmary a few times because he couldn't defend himself against much bigger prisoners very well. In between those times, Naruto put himself into the infirmary after attempting suicide. There was only one group Naruto fit into, and it was the group of people he had sex with. Even that was merely for release on their part, but it got him some protection.

Despite getting into some scuffles, Naruto got his GED and was released from prison early for good behavior (the fights he'd get into were clearly not his fault, and Naruto usually tried to keep to himself, having learned that there was not one good soul inside that prison – not even within the guards). He couldn't leave the state of Nevada even though he desperately wanted to, but being eighteen, on a stipend from the government to get him on his feet, and having no one in the world who cared about him, all Naruto could do was do what he was told. He didn't want to go back to prison, ever.

Settling down in Reno, Naruto finally got an apartment that was basically one room with a tiny kitchenette and bathroom. He was often late with the rent because he had trouble budgeting his money, but luckily the landlord was extremely old and it was easy to convince him that he'd received payment – that is, until his sharp-as-a-tack son came a'knocking, but that was only when he was in the area. It was also difficult for Naruto to land a job. Even explaining his situation didn't prove to warm any hearts, and after enough people had become scandalized over his retelling of killing an old nun after setting an orphanage on fire, Naruto had quit telling the story to explain why he had been in jail for seven years and was only eighteen.

One day, down and out and just having come from a terrible interview, Naruto came across the sparkling, castle-like building of Feel Good, INC. and saw one of the fast food chains within it was hiring. After walking into the impressive lobby and going up to the third floor, Naruto was about to walk over to see if he could get a job at the restaurant when he heard a lot of commotion to one side of the lounge. Upon further investigation, he saw a group of people gathered in front of a wall of TVs, cheering. The TVs were playing pornography, much to Naruto's surprise (he hadn't been paying attention to anything but the job opportunity), and he went over to join them. Just as one of the people on the TV was getting cum blown all over their face, Naruto felt someone tap him on the shoulder. It was a talent scout, interested in who he was.

Naruto got a job that day, but it wasn't at a fast food restaurant.

Personality, Likes & Dislikes: To understand the reason Naruto is the way he is in the present would involve studying his past. Naruto spent about a year in a warm, loving home. Even after his parents' death he was coddled in an orphanage until he could start doing things for himself. Once Naruto became old enough to understand what chores were, he was required to help out around the orphanage with just about everything he could manage, even watching other children. The level of emotional care he received dropped drastically, even though he still got the necessities he needed to remain physically healthy. Around that time, he began acting out for attention.

During his trial, as the youngest child to be tried as an adult in Nevada, Naruto got way too much attention for his liking. Some people were nice to him, like the psychiatrists who came in to talk to him, but he felt they backstabbed him when they got on the stand in court, saying things that made him look all the more guilty. It around then Naruto knew he couldn't trust anyone, and began to clam up.

Prison only made that worse. Just about no one was nice to him there. Not that the guards were mean or abused him when he was still young enough to be watched closely, but they didn't smile at him or offer him kind words. They never wanted to read what he'd written or talk about his grades in "school." It became apparent very quickly to Naruto that he would need to rely on himself, and only himself, because there was no one else in the world who gave a damn about him.

Just as he was getting used to being withdrawn, he was released from his safe haven in prison and thrown in with the rest of the inmates when he was only fifteen. Being withdrawn wasn't enough, and after his protection and special privileges were abruptly torn from him, Naruto had to develop a hard shell. He had to become cagey. He had to learn that there were horrible people in the world who did unthinkable things and they were right next to him; all around him. At first he had attempted to take the route of becoming the "big man in prison" and scaring everyone else, but very quickly Naruto had learned such a thing was not only not going to happen, it was completely impossible. That was when the tactics he had learned while being cooped up alone and isolated had really paid off. Naruto minded his own business and sought out deals with people he definitely couldn't trust, but knew honored a give-and-get relationship.

Out of prison, even though he got out early for good behavior, not a soul trusted him. The prison didn't trust him (he couldn't leave the state, had to fulfill certain things for probation, etc.), the businesses didn't trust him, and the people didn't trust him. When Naruto found out he wouldn't be able to even get a bank account because of his history, he became angry. No one gave anyone the benefit of the doubt. He was sorry. What he had done had been an accident that had happened almost a decade ago. Naruto needed help coping with the real world, and no one would.

So, basically, Naruto won't trust anyone right off the bat, and it will be very difficult to gain his trust. He will probably automatically come to the conclusion that someone is trying to get him in trouble or take advantage of him even if a normal person wouldn't think anything of the sort. Related to that distrust, he believes that most people aren't good, and that they just act good so others will trust them. That's why when something bad happens to someone he'll probably say they deserved it, even when they've been nothing but giving and nice. He will also probably take great amusement in it.

Not always, but there will be sometimes Naruto will go out of his way to fuck someone over. If someone is mean to him, or wrongs him (in Naruto's own opinion), he may exact revenge on them. However, he won't do anything that will land him back in prison, and that's probably the thing he's most scared of. So if someone threatens him with that, saying they will call the cops on him, he will probably cooperate in a second and do whatever they say. In that way, he is very easily manipulated.

However, if Naruto feels someone is actually being nice to him from the goodness of their heart, he will tolerate them. Naruto doesn't have an easy time being friendly, but he does have ways of expressing his thanks to someone. Maybe he'll buy them a burger and leave it on their desk. Maybe he'll hold the door open for them if they're walking directly behind him. But it all depends on how much he feels it's worth his time and how deserving the person is. Even someone who is nice to him has the potential to become someone he distrusts. It may take someone a year to get into his good graces, however it may only take three seconds for them to ruin all of that and alienate him.

Most people will be alienated by him. Naruto is forward and blunt, but when true emotions are in question for him, he can become completely closed off. He is extremely socially awkward, and even if he does want to be nice to someone, he probably won't be able to do it correctly. He'll be more likely to hold himself back and chicken out, because he's not used to talking to other people civilly and he's scared to let anyone in. Also, instead of getting in fights he's more likely to give up and turn the other cheek, mostly because he doesn't want to go back to prison for any reason.

More than just socially awkward, though, Naruto doesn't have any real idea on how to live a normal life. He's used to people taking care of him, so he has to learn life's lessons the hard way. People may see him typing on a computer keyboard at a snail's pace using only one finger, because he never got typing lessons. He always pays for things with cash, no matter how expensive, because he doesn't know how to write a check (and doesn't have any checks, anyway). Even though he lives in a box (more or less), he'll make extravagant purchases on the spot, then decide he doesn't even know what the hell the thing is he just bought.

But most of all, Naruto doesn't think he needs anyone. Despite the gaping hole of loneliness inside of him, he would rather be alone. Or at least that's what he tells himself.

Likes: Miso pork ramen, pizza with everything on it, cheeseburgers with BBQ sauce and no vegetables, animals, being alone, TV, the night sky, writing, origami, music, piercings, milk, soda, fried food, cars, motorcycles, boats, bright colors, spicy food, spending money, making money, feeling free, roller coasters, nature and plants.

Dislikes: Religion, fire, vegetables, being alone, coffee, people, emotional intimacy, technology, feeling trapped, moving slowly, dressing up, socializing, prison, the government, Nevada, shrinks, group therapy, society, not knowing things, getting laughed at, being ignored, being bored, small portions, tasteless food, injustice, animal research.

__________
MUN: Laura
AIM: boy kyuubi
E-MAIL: boykyuubi@aol.com
TIMEZONE: USA/EST
AVAILABLE: Afternoons/nights usually every day.

PB: Luke Worrall