Dandi Watson

[Coughing up feelings just for you...]

2016-09-22T01:15:42Z

When all of your wishes are granted... many of your dreams will be destroyed.

tankgirl @ 2016-03-26T20:30:00

2016-03-27T00:30:59Z

ā, ē, ī, ō, ū
I started typing this with Hepburn but copy-pasting the long vowels is obnoxious. I'm going to just type it straight now for the sake of time and sanity. (ex: Dō = dou)

Hon gēmu wa ōtosēbu ni taiou shite imasu. ōtosēbu kinou o ON ni settei shimasu ka? *Settei wa ato kara "opushon" menyuu de henkou suru koto ga dekimasu.* Raibuedittomōdo wa ōtosēbu ni taiou shite imasen.

-This game is compatible with auto-save. Do you want to set the auto-save feature to ON? *settings can be changed in the "Options" menu later. * Live Edit MOde does not support auto-save.

-Yes -No

------------

Hatsunemiku orijinaru watashi no yobikake ni kotaete kurete arigatougozaimasu.

-Thank you for hearing my call. I am the Original Hatsune Miku.
----

Koko wa anata ga kidou shite kureta gēmu no naka no sekai desu.

-This is where the game tells me to start.

----

Kono sekai no "utau sonzai" desu.
-I, Hatsune Miku, am the "singing presence" of this world.

----
Watashi-tachi ga utau koto de sekai wa seichou shi.
-The World in which we sing is growing.

kagayaki de mitasa reta kuukan ni naru n desu.
-and as we sing, the world becomes filled with shine space.

(These two seem to kinda mean as we sing in this world, we grow shine and make space filled with brilliance.)

----
Hitori de utau koto ga dekimasen.
-You cannot sing alone. (We will not be able to sing alone.)

Utawa sete kureru dareka ga shite hajimete utau koto ga dekiru n desu.
(this came out to be "I can sing for the first time with the "make me sing someone else"?) Assuming this is like the "I can sing with your help" type of message.
----
Zutto... sutto matte imashita. Watashi o utawa sete kureru hito o?
-But, but had someone been waiting to sing with me?
Wakatta komaru.
-I was worried.

----
Onegaishimasu! Dou ka watashi o utawa sete kudasai!
-Please! Can you show me how to sing?

**CHOICE**
Wakatta (All right!)
Komaru (It's a bother.)

(I chose the first one)

Sugoku ureshiidesu!
-I'm really happy!

Kore de, uta o utau koto ga dekimasu! Sekai o kagayaka seru koto ga dekimasu!
-Now you can sing it! You can brighten the world!

Issho ni saikou no mirai o mezashimashou.
-Try to make the best future together with me.
----

Kono sekai no itsutsu no erementoeria...
-There are 5 elements in this world.

Kyuuto, kuuru, byuuti, kaosu, nyuutoraru yuutora.
-Cute, Cool, Beauty, Chaos and Neutral.

(She'll show you a neutral container with a little empty from the top)
Watashi-tachi ga utaenakatta koto de, kagayaki o ushinaitsutsu arimasu?
-Did we lose the shine from not singing? (Are we losing shine by not singing)

Demo, eremento eria no naka de uta o utai, kagayaki no ka "botuteeji" o tameru koto de...
You will store the brilliance of songs called voltage in the element area.

Dondon utatte, boruteeji o tamete ikimashou!
-Fast, let's accumulate voltage!

Saa, ikimasu yo. Uta o utau junbi wa iidesu ka?
Come on, let's go. Are you ready to sing the song well?

**CHOICE**
Junbi wa dekite iru. (I've prepared)
Utaikata o oshiete hoshii. (I want you to tell me how to sing)

(I chose the second one)

If you choose the second option, you will load into the Ievan Polkka (Eva's Polka) Tutorial.
----

Renshuu wa itsu demo dekimasukara nanika ni komattara yatte mide kudasai.
-If you have trouble with something, you can redo this, so please try it.

(It will show you the Options Menu with the fourth option highlighted and a box pops up.)

Opushonmenyuu chuuutoriaru wa houmumenyuu "opushon" no deki "rizumugeimu chuutoriaru" kara itsu demo asobu koto ga dekimasu.
-You can play the tutorial at any time from the "Options" menu and choose "rhythm game tutorial".

(A yellow frame textbox pops up here)
-Miku!
(Miku) Rin! and Len!

(Miku): Shoukai shimasu ne. Kono ko-tachi wa Kagamine Rin to Kagamine Ren.
-Introducing the twins Rin and Len Kagamine.

(Miku): Futari tomo, watashi to onaji kono sekai no "utau sonzai" desu.
-These two exist to sing with me in this world.

(Rin): Hajimemashite. Watashi-tachi no sekai e youkoso!
-Nice to meet you. Welcome to our world!

(Len): Anata ni aete ureshii yo. Korekara yoroshiku na.
-I'm glad to meet you. My regards.

(Miku): Demo... futari tomo kyuu ni dou shita no?
But... why did both of you come so suddenly?

[

2016-03-13T22:44:01Z

Why did you have to steal my heart...?

Taking it from Wonder with her tiny hands covered in splinters.

Taking my mind from white walls sick with age.

I am not a tornado anymore. I am simply a downward spiral.

In the beginning you were happy and I was afraid. I had too much to lose. I had invested too much of my time in tits and confused sexual preference. I did the math. 8 years of my life with a sprite of a girl and I didn't expect a man to sweep me off my feet.

In the beginning I was fire-tongued and spitting venom. I felt the need to test you and it wasn't fair. I pushed limits and a while later realized my feelings for you were starting to cement and my feelings for her were starting to crumble.

I am not the type to believe everyone deserves love. I am more than flawed. I am a self-deprecating monster who doesn't believe anyone will ever love me and mean it.

You've said slews of I love yous. I think you did mean it, but there is no more conviction. I know the catalyst was sparked in my hands. I push things too far. I sabotage. I said and did things I wish I could take back. I really wish I could with my whole heart.

I don't want to regret getting to know you in this way, but I'd be a liar if the thought didn't cross my mind. Now when things seem to be more bad than good, I am kicking myself for not remaining a stoic lesbian.

When I fell in love with you, I wanted to better myself. I wanted to tell you my flaws and hesitations and hoped to be welcomed with support, praised for bravery and to have things bring us closer together.

Too little too late, I suppose.

Now that I'm ready, you're not. You pulled away and had wandering eyes. These are the two worst things for someone like me- someone who already feels as though they can't be safe in love.

I still hurt from what you did, but I have gone against my nature and actually forgave. I forgave you with my whole heart. I also feel like a goddamned idiot for doing so.

Since then, things haven't been the same. I have stopped my mega-fits-of-rage, the crucible I put you through. The crucible I still regret. I'm not asking for a pat on the back. I'm just asking that for once you acknowledge the willingness and effort I'm putting in to try to make this work.

I still mean it when I say that I re-evaluate and try to act and say things from a place of "I want him to be happy." This mantra has kept me from saying or doing hurtful things. I think this was lost somewhere in your psyche, which is natural for someone who's been hurt.

I need to know, can you commit to loving me fully? Can you love me as an equal and not some retarded, juvenile or badly damaged shell of a girl? Can I have your respect? Can you see me from a place that isn't tarnished with the weight of the past? Or is it all too late?

I'm not telling you to trust me completely if it is too hard, but I need your faith. I need your support. I need your respect. More than anything I need you to act towards me from a place of love.

It has hurt me so much lately- hearing every insult under the sun and the terrible things you think of me. I won't even ask if you think they're true. I know you are cut-and-dry blunt. I am disgusted in myself for not only coming across in such unfavorable ways but for staying in a relationship where someone is burdened by the weight of such a tumultuous past.

I used to start fights over nothing. I feel like now you're doing the same- never really dealing with the frustrations of dealing with me or our past.

Please don't relive my mistakes. Please let us have love.

I am here to support you. I am here to forgive. I am here and finally ready to be the person that you want, but it's not easy for me and I am afraid. Give me now what you gave me at the start and I promise you my loyalty, my passion and my whole heart. (Oh hey, that rhymes!)

[Who put this floor here?]

2015-01-04T01:22:49Z

*rolls out from under sofa*

Oh... hey.

2011-10-13T09:04:59Z

Long time no see.

Back, and better than ever. F'rea;/

.

tankgirl @ 2009-03-31T02:55:00

2009-03-31T06:56:07Z

Sunlight is everywhere.

becoming 4

2009-03-31T05:43:51Z

Took three days for them to die. The born again by the serial rights. Lamb of God have mercy on us. Lamb of God will you grant us... (?)

OH!

2009-03-12T06:14:07Z

This is me high with cats. xD

Way saucer way way! If you haven't watched the anime "DragonHalf" yet, go do it NOW. NAOWWWWW I TELL YOU.

equations voted me most provocative. LULZ. xD

*iz ded*

Iz actually drunk, but when else do I update this ish? ♥

Rah, rah, rah rah rah. RAH.

2009-03-12T05:39:36Z

Ugh, I've been sick as a dog and I just started antibiotics. Grrr. I'm allergic to almost every antibiotic on the market. The only one I don't practically die from gives me god-awful stomach pains and I usually get sick from it.

Bawwwww.

This Saturday (Caturday!) I'm doing a shoot in Brooklyn (finally) for the first time in forever and I'm super nervous and dying inside because I'm always afraid I'll not live up to my photographer's expectations. It's like, a huge deal for me. I'm bugging out sadfajsfakjsfalskjf. FUCK. Ugh god damn mother fucking shit. I've got a mouth like a sailor when I'm bugging out.... ugh, I can't believe I'm in such a mood. [...] .

I'm scared. :(

So, like the title of this post, rah rah x whatever I'm not sure if I can go through with this. I might chicken out. I just dyed my hair for it... ughhhhhhh idk idk idk I'm freaking out.

I don't like freaking out. I don't do it often. I need a cigarette. God damn.

Mehhhhhhhhhhhh ehh eh eh eh hhhhhhhffffmph.

That's all I have to say.

Send me quaaludes. Now. Plz. ~.~

tankgirl @ 2009-03-05T01:55:00

2009-03-05T06:55:57Z

Soooo I got called back to an NYC casting of ANTM Cycle 13. xD

I think they're calling it "America's Next Top Shortee" since it's for girls 5'3-5'7''. How funny!

I'll keep you posted on how I do. Now I'm SO glad I didn't do A Shot At Love III!

[ ! ]

2009-03-02T04:40:25Z

Last night was magical. MAGICAL. Way saucer way way pictures and updates and all of that later, but for now I need to sleep, god willing.

Did I say magical? Yeah? Just checkin'.

♥ x1000!

bawwww

2009-02-20T08:46:51Z

Dear hitler, I'm updating this for you because I love you.

I haven't had much to write about as of late. I'm jobless and a lush, and it's borderline tragic.

I'm promoting for a party at the end of the month... and it's going to be fuckery at it's best. 2012... Children of the Bunker. I'm psyched. More UV bodypaint models. More copious amounts of things I shouldn't take. *hehe*

*gigglesnort*

I promise I'll make a better update later. I promise. I promise. :D

Maybe pictures of my new haircut?!

Here's one.

This was my old haircut:

this is my new haircut:

Way saucer, way way.

Sorry I'm such a lameass. xD

♥

oh hai tank(ed) girl what's shakin'?

2009-01-04T06:55:23Z

~Drunk. Again. Yay! I'm listening to Fatboy Slim. C'yeah. Good times.

Beth is officially mildly addicted to videogames and i'm so thrilled. Animal Crossing City Folk and Spore officially keep her awake. Cheers!

Rum and coke. I'm a pirate. *^_^*

Time to eat some chocolate and jam out. Sorry for a lame update. Hope you're all having silly Saturday time like I am.

Love you all. ♥

If you drink, take a shot for me comrades! Here's to an epic new year!

ps- Have any of you ever seen "DragonHalf?" It's HILARIOUS. Watch it... especially all my otaku munchkins out there. *^_^*

Anywho, after much drunken prattling that I just deleted, I'll see you kiddos in the AM. G'night. :P

A few of my favorite things...

2008-12-18T22:10:04Z

If you want to hear some of my favorite music of all time, click on "Pop Out Player" below. There's a little something for everyone.

1- "Hahaha by SMF" is a track my friend spins in NYC and I fell in love with it. It's a little sinister, but imho you can't beat some good hardstyle.

2 and 3 were sent to me by a friend named Rom-e who moved to FL.

4- "Hallucination Generation by Uberdruck". I recently went to see them live in NYC. I wanted to add the song "Now or Never" because I own the signed vinyl and spin it all the time, but the site didn't have it. :(

5-10 Venetian Snares- they're effing insane and probably one of my favorite things to listen to in the world. I especially love "Huslkam Rave Dojo" because it's hilarious. Each song sounds different, so if you don't like one- give a different one a chance. I think most people really like "Hajnal" best since it's a little softer. "Eurocore MVP" has some funky Ragga beats! *^_^*

11- Destroy She Said by Circ. I figured you could use something a little fluffier after Venetian Snares, so here's one of my favorite industrial/QXT's songs. It's funny that such morbid lyrics could sound so sweet hahaha.

12- Ass n' Titties by DJ Assault is something my friends and I tend to slip into our mixes. People dance like crazy when they hear this on a dancefloor. I mainly put this on here as a joke or a guilty pleasure song. xD

13- Zombie Nation by Kernkraft 400. Who doesn't know this song?

--- Now we're going Psytrance.

14-15- Infected Mushroom 14 isn't a very good example of this artist, but I just liked the sample. "Bust A Move" is totally where it's at. It's mindblowing on LSD. *ahem*

17-19 Shpongle Funky trippy beats. The beginning of "Shiva Space Technology" is scary! It gets good about a minute in though. My favorite track out of this bunch is 19.

--- Have a break from electronic music!

20-23 Balkan Beat Box shares members with the band Gogol Bordello! They have a very middle-eastern/brooklyn vibe with subtle scratch and expert remixing. I found out about them recently through my friend Kate. 22 is my favorite.

24-28 Brazilian Girls are another recent find. The first song is really REALLY silly. It's about two of my favorite things~! :P I've had the song "Good Time" stuck in my head for about the past week or so nonstop. Tortoloni! xD

---One more dance song, then a Gorillaz-fest.

29- "Frank Sinatra" by Miss Kittin (and The Hacker) was featured on the Party Monster soundtrack. I wanted to add the song "Professional Distortion" but all the links were broken. :\ This song is really odd, but I really adore it. It's so raunchy and straight up rude lol.

30-39 Gorillaz are my favorite band of all time. End. (Suggested listening- 32 & 33) I only really added some of their lesser-known stuff, including some B-Sides!

40- "Destroy Everything You Touch" by Ladytron is a song I used to dance to every friday night. It's a little different sounding compared to most of their other work, but it's got a softspot in my heart so I added it.

---RAVE! *busts out glowsticks* This section is music I usually spin.

41- Hardcore Vibes I heard this song in 2003 at my first rave. Sadly, this is a cracked out Happy Hardcore version of it, but it's the only one they had. :( **EDIT** I found the "real' version, it's just further down the playlist (56 I think. The site's having issues and won't let me change the order of my playlist right now, so sorry!)

42- Alton Towers is a rave anthem. Had to add it.

43- TeTriS ThEmE! is another rave anthem that we spun @ Nintechno (haha). It was an NYC rave that had 100 SNES systems hooked up to televisions that people could play all night. What a blast!

44- This is some 10 minute Happy Hardcore mix I found so I just added it. I think it's done well and it gives you a better idea of what the genre sounds like if you can hear some songs mixed together continuously. There's quite a few hits on here (esp @ 6:10!). Raise your PLURhearts kids. ♥

---After that, I kind of HAVE to put in something calm. xD

45-47 Metric is music I usually tell everyone to listen to. I added my two favorite songs, and the third is an electropop remix I spin that will lead to...

---Synthpop, electropop and sweet remixin'

48- "Street Justice" by MSTRKRFT. I'm such a sucker for good electro. After adding that last Metric song this popped up so I added it!

49-52- Justice is one of my favorite things to dance to. It's great party music because it's not *zomg techno* but it's got a lot of electronic elements. I love the electronic upright bass!!!! Live electronica ftmfw. 51 features a girl named "Uffie". My new demo has 52 as the opener! ('cept it's sped up a bit and has some breakbeats in it) If you want a copy, I'll mail one to you if you like this. ;D

53-55- Fannypack is a really funny band from Brooklyn that I really needed to add. "Cameltoe" used to be played on the radio (on Z100~!) in the city and was their claim to fame. By now I'm sure you realize my taste in music is far from serious. ^.^

---Stuff I added but it won't let me re-organize my playlist anymore so it's a hodge-podge.

56- Hardcore Vibes by Dune I FOUND THE REAL ONE! *dance dance dance*

57-58 The Logical Song by Scooter. Now, I really REALLY dislike Scooter as an MC. ~.~ "Good Morning! Yee-hah. One, two, one two three four." OMFG SHUT UP and let the music playyyyyy. 57's the real version, but 58 has less annoying Scooter in it so I added both (play it from 4:00 for a sweet mix!).

59-61 Cosmic Gate's "Fire Wire" was something I heard in 2004. When my friend Jen went to London, she heard it on TV again about a year ago. xD Listen to "Exploration of Sound" on Ecstacy and you'll have an auditorygasm... especially about 3 minutes in until about 4:26. Gahhhhhhh. *drools all over keyboard*

62- "Omnibus" by LautSprecher I'm pretty sure Darude's 'Sandstorm' stole straight from this song. I first heard it via mixtape. Someone put it on as a joke and I asked them to find out who did it. I actually didn't find out until quite a few years later. I heard it spun recently in Brooklyn and I'm thrilled to finally have this song back in my life!

63- "Put Your Hands Up For Detroit" by Fedde Le Grand. If you like Benni Benassi, you'll love this. If you want to see a hilarious music video (especially if you like hot women pretending to be assembly-line robots and dancing), click this. I could watch it a million times.

64- "I Need A Freak" by electroCUTE was a song I had to settle for because I couldn't find Kleiner Dicker Junge. :(

65- "Get Ready To Bounce" by Brooklyn Bounce was stuck in my head so I added it so it gets stuck in yours too!

Tell me what you think! Tell me what you like and dislike. You can add songs you like to your own player, and if you make a playlist please share it with me!

hahaha

2008-12-18T08:31:08Z

Do you know how many times I try to log in under "tanggirl"? xD

I've been trying to watch the end of 'Pulp Fiction' forever. I got it on PSP. It skipped. I got it from Blockbuster. It skipped. I got it from effing Netflix- and it's skipping. Fuck. Don't spoil it for me or else! x(

Recently i've met with some trouble. My girlfriend (Beth) has some sleeping issue similar to narcolepsy. I think she's just depressed. In the meantime, i've been drinking whiskey while awake and now I'm blogging. Huzzah!

Goddamnit... drunken prattling again. Oh woe is me.

Anywho, it seems as though this journal is all drugs and drunken mumbles, but I swear it's not. It's just a shame that I'm only left alone at a computer under such circumstances. Boo.

Things will get better.

♥
-D

bass keep pumpin' jumpin' yeah

2008-12-16T13:52:27Z

Mmmm. No sleep again. :)

I just smoked quite a bit of weed and made Beefaroni for breakfast. (I was originally going to make ramen. I had everything ready and all laid out and decided that 45 seconds beats 3 minutes so I opted for the quicker of the two lol.) I'm so gross. xD I also watched a REALLY old episode of Sailor Moon online and it was grand.

Beth's at work. Blahhhhh it's so slushy and cold outside I wish she could just stay in bed and we could roll around under the covers all day or something. It would be lovely.

I have the Brooklyn Bounce stuck in my head. If you know who Brooklyn Bounce is, you're amazing. I need to go out this weekend- hear some techno and effing dance it up. I also need to get Alex's turntables so I can make a new demo. I miss new funky beats. I need to get creative again. Anywho, time for a cigarette and I'm going to attempt sleep (which usually means play pokemon for the next three hours). Ja! ^.^

tankgirl @ 2008-11-21T09:58:00

2008-11-21T15:01:12Z

Boo. Too much adderall. Too much vicodin. Too little sleep. ~.~

I need to get my body on a regular sleep schedule. Recently- I'm awake until 7 am and go to sleep until 4 pm. That's just shitty. I keep trying to go to sleep now (it's going on 10 am) and it's just not working for me. Ugh.

I'm going to go make some tea maybe. Idfk. Sorry for such a boring update. xD

whoo!

2008-11-05T06:19:28Z

WIN! *^_____^*

not work safe, kiddos.

2008-11-04T13:55:20Z

Any of you who are 18+, please don't forget to vote today!

What were you for Halloween? I had to DJ that night, then I had to hop to a different club because I was on a team of girls who were live UV decor. It was a total blast!

tankgirl @ 2008-10-30T15:02:00

2008-10-30T19:03:00Z

Guess who this is?

Oh hai, it's me.

I thought it might be fun if I had everybody make dolls of themselves... then I would make an entry and link all my friends' journals from the dolls they made.

Make one and post it as a comment if you want to be added!

tankgirl @ 2008-10-30T04:25:00

2008-10-30T08:25:50Z

I want a fuckin' cigarette. x(

Do itttt.

2008-10-30T07:11:55Z

Fill this out and post it as a comment. :D

1) Are you currently in a serious relationship?
A.
2) What was your dream growing up?
A.
3) What talent do you wish you had?
A.
4) If I bought you a drink what would it be?
A.
5) Favorite vegetable?
A.
6) What was the last book you read?
A.
7) What zodiac sign are you?
A.
8) Any tattoos and/or piercings? Explain where.
A.
9) Worst habit?
A.
10) If you saw me walking down the street would you offer me a ride?
A.
11) What is your favorite sport?
A.
12) Do you have a negative or optimistic attitude?
A.
13) What would you do if you were stuck in an elevator with me?
A.
14) Worst thing to ever happen to you?
A.
15) Tell me one weird fact about you.
A.
16) Do you have any pets?
A.
17) What if I showed up at your house unexpectedly?
A.
18) What was your first impression of me? (hmmm...careful!)
A.
19) Do you think clowns are cute or scary?
A.
20) If you could change one thing about how you look, what would it be?
A.
21) Would you be my crime partner or my conscience?
A.
22) What color eyes do you have?
A.
23) Ever been arrested?
A.
24) Bottle or can soda?
A.
25) If you won $10,000 today, what would you do with it?
A.
27) What's your favorite place to hang at?
A.
28) Do you believe in ghosts?
A.
29) Favorite thing to do in your spare time?
A.
30) Do you swear a lot?
A.
31) Biggest pet peeve?
A.
32) In one word, how would you describe yourself?
A.
33) Do you believe/appreciate romance?
A.
35) Do you believe in God?
A.
36) Will you repost this so I can fill it out and do the same for you?
A

Spencer Tunick Update

2008-10-28T12:25:11Z

x-posted to dandi. Original update was here with a backstory on the artist and my nude adventures lol xD

Where's Waldo? Can you find me? :P (answer's in the comments)

beep!

♥

tankgirl @ 2008-10-23T04:14:00

2008-10-23T08:16:43Z

gotchabitchez got me... fuck.

When i'm on a dancefloor with a good bassline, life is amazing. ♥

tankgirl @ 2008-10-23T02:24:00

2008-10-23T06:24:09Z

I should probably change my name to "tankedgirl" heh. I'm tipsy.
My girlfriend is asleep. I take too much adderall. I'm wide awake. I want someone to talk to. Boo on me. I just went outside for a cigarette and it's cold. I hate it. Ughhh... I wish I had something interesting to update about but I don't. Life's fallen into a rut of predictability and it's not that fun. Meh.

I've been playing a shit-ton of Pokemon Pearl. This probably is why i've had no life recently hahaha. xD

Tell me of your recent adventures and delightful experiences. I need to know the whole world isn't in the same place I am right now.

Thanks for reading, as always m'dears. ♥