ojandtostitos posted in blueridgeschool:

Characters: Tatum & her father.
Setting: December 24th; Christmas eve morning, Portage Lake, Maine.
Content: SFW but sad shit!
Summary: Tatum comes out to her dad on a whim when the opportunity presents itself, and things don't go so well.


Driving in her father's police car always gave the stoner in her a distinct shudder, but Tatum couldn't deny the fond memories associated with it. Taking rides in the squad car with dad was a much more common occurrence during childhood, but sitting slouched down in the leather passenger seat waiting for him still brought back that feeling of nostalgia. Sometimes he would just pick them up and go, sometimes the three of them and sometimes just one, but it had always been fun. He knew how to make them smile, despite being a mostly serious father. Michael usually knew what made each child happy, turning on the lights once in a while to run red lights and amuse Rath, making a show of ensuring they were all wearing seatbelts to please Sera, and usually stopping for ice cream to make Tatum smile. Sometimes he'd let Sera sit up front alone, and let the twins ride in the back behind bars. There was a picture of them like that in their living room, she was pretty sure.

Times driving around at her father's side were definitely some of her fondest recollections, but the memories were definitely bitter-sweet. Today was a different car ride, and she was ten years older, ten years somehow less wise. Would memories be all that she had after she did this, just dropped the bomb on him?

There was no right way to tell him, and she couldn't keep it inside any longer. Eighteen years of lies quickly culminated into a volcano of emotions once she let the pressure build. Everyone said it would be all right, surely he'd be mad at first but probably he would get over it. Even Rath had said so, and that was part of her biggest encouragement. Both of her siblings were surprisingly supportive, and she knew she loved Mack. Just thinking of the blonde made her stomach do a flip. How could he fault her for her feelings? It wasn't like she could control them, as if she hadn't tried, wasted years trying.

It was Christmas eve, and no one in her family was surprised she still had a bit of shopping to do at the literal last minute. She had been asking her step-mother about borrowing the family's van to go into Portland for a few hours. When her father interjected and offered to drive her, she had felt hesitation grip her heart. One on one time was a terrifying concept, but necessary. She had been waiting for a few minutes alone so that they could just.. talk and get it all out. But with the perfect opportunity falling into her lap, it felt staged, too convenient. Something would go wrong. Especially on Christmas eve. Was it really the time to drop the bomb? She didn't see another chance. If she was going to tell him, there was no time like the present to bite the bullet.

She had climbed into the car with a feeling of dread, her arms crossed and hood up on her sweater, which she was snuggled down into. She resisted the urge to write her name in the frost on the window, and jumped as Michael finally climbed in and slammed the door behind him. She saw two travel mugs balanced in his grip, and the redhead took them and put them into the cupholders as Michael shed his gloves and began to rub his hands together to warm them up. "Maine winters," he said, which really said everything. Tatum nodded as he reached across her to jack up the heat. "Coffee, sweetie. Your choice, both have plenty of sugar," he informed her, making a quick gesture to the mugs as he threw the car into gear and began to pull out of the snowy driveway.

Tatum did her best to stare out of the passenger window, chewing her lip and watching the white and green blurs of trees fly by. Where did she even begin? They were five minutes down the road before she reached over and took her coffee, clearing her throat weakly before speaking. "Dad, w-we can.. uhm, talk about w-whatever, right? Like a-anything?" she asked suddenly, wanting to bury her face in her hands as soon as she said it. She was so stupid.

Michael, either not noticing his daughter's distress or ignoring it, gave one stiff nod without taking his eyes off of the road or releasing the wheel. "Of course, Tatum. What did your sister do this time?" he half-joked, just barely smiling. "N-No, not Sera," the redhead piped up, automatically defending her little sister despite herself. She had no intention of mentioning her, or dragging her and Jenny into this. Even if Sera deserved it after all of the things she had ever said or done. "It's me," she added, ducking her head and clenching the hand around her coffee as Michael dared a glance at her.

"Is something wrong? It isn't your boyfriend, is it? He didn't lay a hand on you, did he?" he asked seriously. She was touched by his concern, even as her stomach tried to climb up her throat in growing terror. "I always said you should have dated a Quidpot player anyway, not a cheerleader. That's something girls do," he went on, frowning a little be still looking straight ahead. The Sam kid had seemed nice enough, but if he was upsetting his daughter like this, then that was another story. "Have you told your brother? I'm sure he would step in," he added.

"D-Dad, stop it!" Tatum replied hastily, surprising him and herself with the shrillness of her tone. He turned to look at her finally full on, noticing she looked even more pale than usual. The coffee mug in her hands surely would have been spilling all over her lap if there wasn't a lid, her hands were shaking so hard they seemed to vibrate against the side of the mug. "Sam didn't.. he wouldn't, he just-- he just didn't do anything, okay? He's great, I just- this is.. s-something that's my fault. Nobody else d-did anything," she tried to explain, her voice low and shaking a bit. Michael wondered once again what had gotten into her. "T," he said evenly, eyes moving back to focus on the road. "What is this really about? You can tell me what's going on. You're not going to be grounded or something," he went on, trailing off a bit. "We're all adults here now, aren't we?"

Tatum took little comfort in his words, considering that she had been grounded during just the summer past, and for a lot less than being gay. She swallowed hard. "O-Okay," she agreed, though she didn't really believe him even if she wanted to. If he just gave her a two week grounding or something over this, that would have been fine with her. She had a feeling it was going to get much worse. Unsure where to begin, she had no idea how one was meant to leeway into the subject of their sexuality, she just cleared her throat softly again. "Well, I have.. I h-have these, uhm. You know, like f-feelings," she tried to explain, getting another quizzical glance from him in reply. "F-For my friend."

Licking her lips, which felt incredibly dry, she turned to stare fully out of her window now instead. "S-Sera's friend, uhm.. acutally. She m-met her first."

Hearing the word 'feelings' had more or less shut off Michael's attention. He certainly didn't pay enough to notice the use of her over him. Speaking to the girls about romance and emotions was much more of his wife's idea of a good time than his own. When it came to talk about feelings and closeness, it usually just made him close up. He loved his children, but the emotional messy bits had always sort have been Madline's department. "You know, your mother is much more well equipped to deal with these sort of talks," he replied slowly, still without looking at her. Tatum was still staring blankly out of her window as well.

"No dad, you d-don't.. it's d-different, I think I-I'm gonna d-date Mackenzie," she said quietly after a minute, feeling like she was going to puke as soon as she blurted it out. "I l-love her," she added, needing to make that clear but only making herself more nauseous. She waited as silence invaded the space between them, and she was almost sure he might not have heard her. Just a few seconds later, however, the car began to slow down a little and he turned his head away from the road to look at her seriously. She stared back, swallowing a lump in her throat and struggling to read his expression.

"Mackenzie? Your sister's friend Mackenzie? One of those girls from Texas?" he asked. Hesitating for a second, Tatum then nodded numbly. She barely had a chance to say anything else, opening her mouth to apologize, as the police car slowed down even more. Carefully, Michael pulled to a complete stop on the shoulder of the road, gravel crunching under the tires. He was staring out of the front window again, not looking at her, and Tatum's stomach was more tied in knots than ever. "D-Daddy?" she asked, hating how little her voice sounded. Reaching over, she tried to lay a hand on his arm, but he quickly shrugged it away. "Get out," he said simply, and Tatum felt her stomach bottoming out a second later as his words registered fully in her mind.

Momentarily dizzy, she fought back that wave of nausea. There was absolutely no more turning back now, she was in it deeper than she could turn ever back from. "D-Dad," she repeated again, trying to keep her voice from cracking. "Y-You don't mean t-that, I d-didn't mean to do i-it," she managed to get out, but the stony expression on his face said it all, told her that his mind was made up. She couldn't fully read the mixture of emotions swirling inside of him, and it was bothering her. Anger was showing through the most, maybe even a little disgust. His knuckles were white as they held the wheel. "No daughter of mine," he began slowly, and Tatum surprised herself by cutting him off. "Y-Yes, daughter of y-yours! I'm your.. I'm s-still your daughter, I just-- I love her, d-daddy, you don't understand h-how much I like her, I don't-- I didn't e-even know p-people could feel like this, it feels r-right."

She was trying to be reasonable, it was what Rath and Sera would have done. Reasoning with him was her only real chance, and even that seemed to be a fading and slim shot. She waited anxiously for him to answer her, and it was only a moment before he did. "I don't have gay children. I don't have some.. some lesbian for a daughter. Not under my roof," he replied firmly, as if him telling her so suddenly made her words untrue. "B-But you do, I'm still--" she tried to protest again, but she was stunned into complete silence when her father reached across the tiny space of the police car, the backside of his hand slapping her face. It wasn't hard enough to stun her, but the damage was done and she already felt her lower lip shaking as tears began to build. He looked shocked himself for just a second before gathering his proper composure.

"Get out," he repeated, and she almost swore now his voice was the one cracking. Under the cold exterior, something emotional was stirring but Tatum was positive it was out of reach. "You broke my heart, Tatum. And your mother.. your poor mother," he sighed heavily, eyes closing as his fists gripped the wheel tightly once again. "You had it all. You were going to be the best doctor.. we were so proud, but you're just going to throw your life away for some girl? You're going to do this to us?"

He was asking all of the hard questions, making her feel small and ashamed, and she didn't know how to answer at first. "S-She's not just s-some girl. I told y-you," she whispered, sniffling a little. Her hand was on the door handle, but she was scared to actually use it. If she got back out, would she ever get back in? To his car, to his house, to anywhere? She didn't even have anything to put her belongings into when she got home. However long that would be; they were at least a few miles from home now.

"We're both adults here," Michael said, echoing his earlier words but with none of the earlier fondness and affection. He spoke to Tatum without looking at her. "And you've clearly made this adult decision on your own, and you seem to believe this is what is best for you.. be that as it may, you're wrong. If you need time to realize that.. so be it. You can return home when you get your senses back. I want your things out of the house before I get home from work. You won't be living in sin under my roof, in my house. I'll phone your mother and tell her you're stopping by."

Tatum turned to look at him fully, tears still in her eyes though she was trying extremely hard not to sob outright. Even though she really did want to. "I-I have my senses, I can't change," she whispered harshly, biting hard on her lower lip. She couldn't believe she was talking to her father like this, about this. It was going even worse than she imagined, but still she wasn't surprised. His views had been no secret to her coming into this situation. "Believe m-me, I've tried.. d-dad, I tried s-so hard, this is j-just me," she added, pleading.

Beside her, Michael's hands just flexed on the steering wheel again. "I don't have a gay daughter," he repeated. Swallowing thickly, Tatum finally got enough courage to push the door open, letting the cold air rush inside of the car. "I-I guess I don't have a d-dad then," she replied quietly, hopping out and slamming the door behind her. There was just a minute where she thought he wouldn't leave her, but then he was pulling back onto the road, just driving straight on ahead. He'd probably just go on through to Portland like nothing had even happened.

Once the car was out of sight, the white body and obnoxious lights on top far in the distance, Tatum finally let herself really cry, a long shrill sob escaping her as she held her hands against her face. This was all so wrong, and on top of it, now she was just standing on the side of the road in the middle of nowhere, road and trees on all sides for miles. Had he remembered she could apparate home now that she was of age, or did just not care? Swallowing thickly, she grabbed her phone from the pocket of her jeans, fumbling it and trying to decide who to call as she began to trudge back up the side of the road in the general direction of home. She'd have a few hours until Michael finished work and came back to the house, but it suddenly seemed way too few hours to pack her whole life up and leave her home behind her.