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[04 Dec 2008|04:40am] |
i hate lies
end of story
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| TORN |
[07 Nov 2008|10:56pm] |
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ok so im in between if i want to model for suicide girls or gods girls, ive heard some pretty messedup things about sg...and nothing bad about gg...i dont know what to do! can someone reasearch and help me out :(
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| halloween night |
[01 Nov 2008|04:26pm] |
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it was very crazy went to the grove like everyone and there mom was there. it turned out to be disatrous bc amber dipped w victor and didnt tell me where she was going thank god kelvin and his friend were w. me..i was exhausted frm halloween h.n and my feet killed i was there only ride home and they left me so i left there fone was dead. ugh w.e its complicate man
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| 1 more day! |
[28 Oct 2008|12:28am] |
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so my sg account got cancelled today due to my non payment. sux.........bored no job & no entertainment.
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| 2day!!!! til i leave |
[27 Oct 2008|05:48pm] |
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when i try 2 type fast my words get all jumbled so excuse words lol
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| fading |
[19 Oct 2008|03:13am] |
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im feeling extremly depressed i read up on alzheimers diease a lil while ago & im just so upset that this has to happen to my dad, hes forgetting more &more and i read one article that said death is inevitable...which has struck something to my heart. i dont want to be without a father, i love him so much. i never talk about this but this is something that eats away at me every single day...i feel bad about going out on the weekends, i feel bad about doing drugs..i feel like i shouldnt be wasting my time while time is so precious i hate myself for the things i do to escape. i always get an escape frm drugs..its my way out, my way to feel happy. i dont know what to do. i need help im so sad im holding in the tears.im lost agian and i need a hand to show me the way out. i feel like i should be sober & not smoke pot or do x..like i should be baptized and clean and new...but i feel like im so young im not going to know how to that, i know ill mess up.especially when ultra is coming very soon& i know id want to roll.......what am i doing. am i thnking wrong? am i thinking right. i need things to be the way they used to..the days he cooked & cleaned and looked after me are gone..i dont know how im going to be when i do get older bc a huge chunck is missing from my life..i never had my dad there alot when i was growing up as a child & as a teen he got alzheimers...he is suppose to walk me down the aisle..i feel like i need to marry young so i can see him walk me down the aisle. im so upset, i should have never read it. but then agian it told me what i already knew, what ive been denying for 2 almost 3 yrs now. i need to speak with someone who does know about this diease. i want someone to be here for me right now,im so alone right now, its the worst feeling.
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| today |
[17 Oct 2008|06:25pm] |
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ok so ambers having a party kim& hannah are going to be there & yes there will be drinking..OH the drama..as the plot thickens..
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| happy@ 2:43 |
[17 Oct 2008|06:50am] |
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bc I got to see him. smiles.
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