out of character.
hello my name is Tobi
you can contact me at lomwat@yahoo.com OR mauchirox@hotmail.com OR mymsies1287@aim.com
in character.
Ciao! I am Cosmo Moretti the Great, a twenty-one year old senior and superior tenor from Genoa, Italy (also known as la Superba.)
uno. I think first of all you should know that I do not date ugly girls. Period. It is not that I'm shallow, it is simply because we are obviously not compatible in any way and I would hate for them to seem pale in comparison to my own natural beauty. You understand, yes? This face, oh it is so much more of a curse than a blessing.
due. I am a very romantic person, even by my own tasteful standards. Perhaps I was more than a little influenced by the grand operas I had seen as a young boy, and they left quite a chivalrous impression on me, gentleman that I turned out to be. Long walks along the harbor, moonlit dinners, the works - nothing is too good for my lady companions. So, if any available bellas would like to try their hand with me, just know that I am waiting for you! As long as you are not an ugly girl of course. Sorry.
tre. I am a singer by birth. In fact, my mother claimed that I did not enter this world with a wail, but with a resounding trill like the sweet sound of a bird. The only instrument I will ever need is my voice. I understand that some of you are not as well-endowed as I, but I do not think any less of you for playing those unnatural instruments that are not a part of you.
quattro. I am one of the few true male tenor of the world. Not many other singers can match me, even at my worst, but I do not expect them to. That would be ridiculous to expect of average singers. My image is very hard to live up to, I am well aware. I do believe that I will be a valuabe asset in the near future when I graduate.
cinque. Italian is my first language, but I speak English fluently. In fact, my English is better than most Americans because when I came to this country I made it a goal to learn fifteen new words every day. Fortunately for all of you, I also do not use contractions. Why would I deprive you of even one beautiful syllable that drops from these lips like so many pearls? Even now, I still read the dictionary every day.
sei. I am the youngest of four brothers. It is only natural that I have many role models to look up to, what with the Moretti clan being so gifted in everything they do (no surprises there). Two are training to be professional football players, and my eldest brother became a priest just last year. While my family was hoping for me to do the same, I have already convinced them that I am more passionate about my singing than anything else. If not for their support, I would not be at Allegro today. That would have been a shame for all of you, of course! My family is very proud of my progress and tends to dote on me and only me (not that I am spoiled or anything; I am simply deserving of such attention).
sette. Although I am not planning on joining the church just yet, I might pursue it after I retire. I am well-devoted to the Catholic Church and went with my family often when I still lived in Italy, and still make a point of attending Mass. The church inspired me more than anything else to give my gift of song to the world.
otto. At the tender age of six I participated in the choir, up until I turned eighteen and moved to America. What an enlightening experience! Choir is much more of a social function in my motherland, so there were not many opportunities to pursue my singing professionally. But oh how I can still vividly remember the long walks we took in those beautiful gardens. I was disappointed by the hideous public parks they have here, but everyone suffers for their art I suppose. Even beautiful people.
nove. It may seem obvious since I am attending Allegro, but it is my dream to perform professionally as an opera singer. Perhaps in the Royal Opera House of London even! I shall travel the world, dazzling everyone with my charms and voice. A small dream for a city-boy such as myself, no?
dieci. I do not wish to seem 'full of myself', but it is a well-known fact that I am what you call popular around these parts. Yes, just say my name and anyone will recall my wonderful singing on a whim. My voice is just that powerful. It may seem like a burden to some, but I take pleasure in brightening everyone's mornings by practicing my scales while I stroll the campus grounds. I astonish myself sometimes with how considerate I am.
segreto. I am proud of my voice, but nobody is perfect, even me. I tend to get sick since it is colder than I am used to here and when I have a cold- ugh! It is horrific, my voice. So scratchy and coarse. I can hardly squeak a note and I shudder just thinking about it. If I ever get reduced to that state, I usually lock myself in my room for days. Cosmo Moretti the Great, reduced to a wailing alley cat by the whims of the weather. If anyone, especially those who are jealous of my success, were to hear of this weakness of mine... well, let me just say that my reputation would be in shambles!
pb/picture. Paolo Nutini. |