The Seed's Euphoria

-Rants, confessions, and thought provacatives included.

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Name
Solnight

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June 12th, 2008

IV. The empty truffle

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So it's been a while since I've wrote in my online journal. At this moment I'm going to personafy my journal because I think It'll be easier for me. SO MY JOURNAl'S NAME IS LEO. YES!!

Dear Leo,

So graduation past and I don't know how I should be feeling. I thought there would be more to it. I thought I would gain new powers in which I can make people bow down to me. But then I realized, graduation was not only turning a page to close a chapter, it was also opening to the next. So in essence life is going to keep on going. It's kind of odd now that I'm starting college. In only a few months I'll be eighteen. That's the age you're supposed to spread your wings and take the world on.
At the same time I feel accomplished that I finsihed High School, but yet at the same time not. When I think about it, if someone were to leave me behind in a forest, I would DIE. I'm glad I live in a villa. XD

But anywho, that's just a mixed up emotional me talking, Leo. Let's keep going. . . CREATIVE STYLE!! WOOO!

I'm filled to the brim with sorrow that my friends are all leaving at some point this Summer. It's kind of an odd feeling, but at the same time the good bye I say to my friends does not only bring forth a wave of despair and agony, but also it leaves me suffocating in a sense of hope. My sister from another mister left last Sunday and I felt sad. Usually I'm the one that says good bye, but this time I was the one watching them leave.

It's odd. o_o
But this must've been how my twenty other aquaintances felt when I had moved away. I call them not friends - I've lost contact with them over the years, and an addition to that they're not the type of personalitys I would dwell in sadness if they were ever to depart.

For the past three years however, I am fortunate to have met friends, whom I can easily say will be very much missed and cried over, and whom I'll pester by the use of facebook or whatever other means I have at my disposal. Although a friend of mine has become very much distanced - to a point where we haven't talked like friends should in months, I still think of them as a friend.

It's a really weird complicated relationship. I don't know what this other person holds me up to, but to me, this person is still somewhat still close to me, as it was before the moments everything became so tangled up in a web of mental assumptions. I honestly don't know when it became so jacked up, but I believe it was around the time I joined Model United Nations. It's all a bagatelle now, I've moved on and forgiven past mishaps. An entity once said to forgive all. I forgave, but boy was that hard. TwT


I'm HAPPY to have graduated, though. I'm so happy I won't have Mr. Malone ever again, or will I do another practice record. -my two roots of stress- Oddly enough AP Lit didn't really freak me out as much as I would've thought. Yes, it made me mad that at times we were assigned useless assignments (ASS.), but it wasn't that bad as compared to Mr. Clausen's workload. My god. I bet he plans his homework's during the summer he goes over to Thailand. What the heck does he do so much over there? I'm sure the sights wouldn't be as thrilling if you go there as much. Hmmmmm. But then again, he's an okay person, so I won't make fun of him.


TODAY:
I went to the I Park mall with Kendra. It was fun, but I was sad I didn't have enough money. Suprisingly the food wasn't expensive. We had Italian, I had Carbonera and Kendra had a Hamburger Steak with tomato sauce on it. Not bad. I only wished they didn't put so much bacon in my food. I'm not too much fan of meat. I'm really picky for what meats I eat actually. But fish will always be okay with me. I eat that almost everyday. XD

So as we were walking back towards the Dragon Hotel, we run into this girl who graduate last year. She was running, but we end up talking for thirty minutes. It was funny how she still has some scars from Mrs. Lozano. I love Mrs. Lozano, but I could understand what pains this girl must feel thinking of such memories. *was there when this girl was picked on*
This girl said she liked my hair cut.


So as we go to the dragon we meet up with yet another alumni from SAHS. Who also liked my hair cut and had a wierd, and had an almost un-natural fascination with how good I looked today. It made me feel akward, since he was a guy. I don't mind since you know made my ego go up some, but yeah. Wierd experiences. o_____o


I ended up buying hair gel, and I happened to get a free face massager with it. Not bad eh.

Hmmm Leo, that's it for today. My thumb is tired from typing. I don't why it's only my thumb.
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May 24th, 2008

III. Irony

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As I was dancing the other day I twisted my ankle. At first I thought I was fine, but it started to hurt - a lot. So I went to the emergency room and get them to check it up. I was hoping I would get a cast, because I never ever gotten hurt like this before. Maybe sick, but never anything physical really.

The Doctor kept talking slow to us and making hand motions. Can I say america all over again? XD
Well it wasn't that bad, it just reminded me of a few not so good memories of the past. The neat thing is, you know how you get those discharge papers telling you what you have, what to watch out for, and how to take care of your injury? I got on in Spanish. :D
It had a lot of medical type words I didn't know how to spell. :D
So I'm happy.

But I hate it that I can't dance anymore or run at the gym. Bleh. And it keeps swelling up. +-+


Hmmm these two people I ran from my lunch table to eat with. They're in Cahootz with the reason why I left the lunch table. : /

I didn't see that coming at all, but it's okay I guess. :D
I have a very short time left before I end school. <3


I am almost finished with the bloody application for Underwood. I just need to fill out the awards section. It's been a doozy, since you actually have to show you got it through means of photocopies/photo - my search through boxes go on. I have a few out, but a few awards are hidden in the storage closet.

It's a three day weekend and I'm happy. : )
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May 18th, 2008

II. Just checkin in.

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Prom was okay. The Salmon was very well balanced in flavor and texture, that it could be eaten alone without the need of rice or something of that degree. The other choices were beef or chicken. The Cheesecake wasn't overwhelmingly strong. It was suprisingly good, since I don't like to eat Cheesecake. For the Dragon it wasn't bad overall.

Now I have to say, the music was fine, but the DJ should have mixed it up a whole lot more. He kept playing R&B and Rap for two hours. And the only song that wasn't of that two, was the song I requested, some techno ...song.

The day before I went to my first rock concert. It was cool. The first band was Saliva. They were awesome and the main singer look like a ninja. The second band sucked. By the time everything was over I was drenched in beer, smelt of smoke, and all bruised up on my foot. It was crazy, but it was better than having nothing to do. THe moment I touched my bed I was out. And I was still out the following morning.


I'm almost finished with my Underwood International College application, Just one more darn essay. And maybe a personnal statement. I'm not sure, since the essays could be statement, but I don't know. I'll ask Mrs. McHan tommorow. After I'm done with everything she'll take care of the rest and help me along the way. I should be finished by the end of this week. *dances*


Mmmmm okay. I was going to say more cool things, but they slipped out of my head.

May 13th, 2008

I. Primero

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Gah!! I hate it when capatilized i's look like L's. I just noticed that as I was trying to make a title. I was trying to make a roman numberal one, but oh well.

Today I ate lunch away from my normal circle of friends, again. I didn't feel guilty.

So today I realized I can't survive the school day with just a fruit and a stick of cheese. Which according to my friends, should be peeled, not bitten off. To me, it's just cheese. And if I'm going to peel little strings off for an hour just to eat it, you can forget it. Although... it is amusing, I have to admit.

Yesterday, I went to the movies with two friends, T and J, and saw 10,000 B.C. It was an actually good movie as contrar to my god like intuition. It's not a comedy, but more of a action type movie. 

As I just sit down to think, I fear that I keep transcending behind my inner mental walls to the idea that skipping the next three weeks of school is actually a good idea. It's very tempting, as if it were a chocolate bar in front of me. I mean what is the worst that could happen? 

Today was not a good day outside. It was cold an rainy.

Okay.

That was my first blog thing here. I Didn't know what else to put. oh. Random fact:

Colombians eat white cheese with almost anything that is sweet. : )
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