FAIRFAX Fairfax pushed the broom very slowly in the hospital wing where he was working. Swish, tap, swish, tap. His green little jumper suited him nicely and he had a way of blending into the background when he really wanted to. Every once in awhile, he'd let himself shine when a patient would go by. Their eyes would light up and they would think they'd seen an angel when really it had just been Fairfax letting down his dreary glamor to give them a little sparkle of hope for the day. Wheeling his trash can along behind him, he hummed to himself casually as he worked.
SHANNON Being in the hospital day in and day out was worrisome and Shannon was mostly just tired. He never got to go home, not that there was much of one to go to, but even getting out for a little while would have been nice. He was down to just skin and bones, the chemo treatments doing a number on his body, but by some miracle he hadn't lost any of the hair on his head. It was thinner, sure, more brittle than it had been when he'd been healthy, but it was still there and some days that was all that kept him going. Just that he wasn't totally defeated. Today he was restless, not very different from any other day, but he managed to get up and he started out of his room. The boy wore scrubs, always, because he tended to wander around and the last thing he wanted was everyone seeing his backside. When he got to the door he peeked out to make sure no nurses were around and that was when he spotted Fairfax. Smiling a little bit, he wandered over to him. "What are you humming today?"
FAIRFAX "Something I remember without remembering." He said quietly. Fairfax had a lot of memories that weren't necessarily his own. He figured they were from some sort of collective history he shared with his sort of people. Then again, maybe he'd just heard it on the radio somewhere.
SHANNON That was fair enough. Shannon was curious by nature but it was an answer that satisfied him, mostly because he liked the way it sounded. "Very busy today?" Idle chatter because he was lonely and the nurses had long since gotten past the point of friendly to the scared new kid. Some of them were still nice, because he'd been there so long, but most of them he knew weren't happy to be there.
FAIRFAX "I'm never busy." Fairfax laughed, face brightening as he finally drew his eyes from the sweeper to the kid in front of him. They glinted, just a little and he blinked them slowly so that their color shone particularly bright. Leaning casually on his broomstick, he examined the one before him. "Were you looking for a game?"
SHANNON "I would love a game." Shannon pushed his glasses up a little higher on his nose and then he pushed back the sleeves of the gray thermal shirt he was wearing beneath the cerulean covered scrubs. "What sort of game?"
FAIRFAX Fairfax kept a close watch on the people in this place. He liked to think he was a guardian of sorts. Pursing his lips, he glanced down the long empty hall and then the trash bin. Replacing the bag with a new one, he climbed inside of it and gestured for Shannon to come inside as well. "Not a win or lose game, but another sort."
SHANNON There was no hesitation for Shannon as he climbed into the trash bin with Fairfax. He knew if the nurses saw him out of his room, and in a trash bin, he was giong to get his ass handed to him but for the moment this was the most exciting thing that had happened all week and he wasn't going to pass it up.
FAIRFAX "It's a ship." He noted, in case Shannon hadn't guessed, but it was more than just telling the boy what it was. As Fairfax's honeyed voice wrapped around them, the reality of his words permeated the air between them and the trash bin suddenly was a ship. True, it was a small one and no one else saw how quaint and cozy it was sailing down the middle of the hospital halls pushed by Fairfax's broom-oar. But as they went, the floors seemed to splash up around them, and the horizon shimmered in the distance where the emergency exit should have been.
SHANNON The sudden image of a ship, and the splashing of the floor startled Shannon and he leaned forward closer to Fairfax. "It's a ship." he squeaked, surprised that he was honest to god standing in what he thought was a ship in the middle of a hospital. "Wow." He whispered. "How did you do that?"
FAIRFAX Some of his kind would lure pretty things into their midst, dazzle them and do with them as they saw fit. Fairfax had never quite separated himself from the world at hand and so while his magics were nice, he always had a foothold on earth. "Hm? Do what? I didn't do anything. You did." He pushed the brush-oar so that they sailed around a corner into a much more deserted hall and a gull flew by them.
SHANNON Shannon let out a delighted noise at the sight of the seagull and only after it had passed out of view did he turn his attention back ahead of them. Then he leaned over the edge of the boat, wanting to touch the water to see if it was wet or if it just felt like floor. "I didn't do this."
FAIRFAX Fairfax put a hand on his shoulder. "Oh no, don't do that. You'll fall out and drown. We wouldn't want that." His grip was tight, spindly fingers curling inward against Shannon's skin. Eventually, the image faded away and they bumped into the wall, the earthly thud of the trash bin bringing them back to where they were.
SHANNON He felt warmth where Fairfax touched him and he pulled back from the edge of the trash can to look over his shoulder at the man. The image was gone and suddenly they were back in the hallway, still standing in the trash can together. "How did you make it look like that?"
FAIRFAX "Like what?" He tilted his head, looking as innocent as a kitten as he folded his arms across his chest and then gracefully crawled out of the trashcan. Fairfax was mostly made out of dreams, his skin woven by sleep and by imaginings. He was the stuff of childish play, through and through. Lazy looking eyes smiled warmly at Shannon. "What's your name?" He asked.
SHANNON "Shannon." He stayed in the bin for a moment longer and then climbed out so that he wasn't in there alone. Then he brushed himself off and smiled up at Fairfax. "What's your name?"
FAIRFAX "Fairfax." He said honestly, not minding so much granting this kid the sort of power that came along with his name. A fae could only be so wiley. He watched him for a little while, and then brushed himself off, mimicking what the boy had done. He'd been on this world for years and still he found some of it hard to sit in.
SHANNON That made Shannon smile, the mimic of his movements and he brushed himself off again just to see if Fairfax would do the same. "How long have you worked here? I see you around sometimes, you always look so... light."
FAIRFAX Face breaking farther into a smile, Fairfax was beginning to look like a cheshire cat, going from happy to perhaps a little dangerous. He brushed himself off, this time even more obviously copying Shannon's movements. "Light? Like I could fly? Or like the sun? I've worked here since I was . I like it here."
SHANNON "Like the sun." He lifted his hand and adjusted his glasses and then brushed his hair back, watching and waiting to see if Fairfax would mimic that too. "You shine sometimes, just a little bit. I don't know how else to explain it, but I like it. I always watch out my door for you."
FAIRFAX "You cheated." Fairfax pointed out. "I don't have glasses." After a moment of consideration, he reached forward and took Shannon's, placed them on his face, adjusted them, brushed his hair back and then handed the spectacles back to his new little friend. "And I know you do. The only reason I shine is because people see me." As if his existence was based on other people's knowledge of him. Fairfax yawned, stretching his arms up above his head. "What are you here for?" He asked. He listened carefully to the goings on of the hospital, but often times it was a jumbled mess and he didn't understand all of the technical jargon.
SHANNON "Cancer." He never bothered to say the specific type because honestly who cared? Cancer was cancer and most people didn't know the difference enough to know which types were worse and which ones seemed easy enough to cure.
FAIRFAX His face didn't change, half-lidded eyes staying serene. "Are you going to die?" He'd watched the most lovely people pass away, and they always made him sad. Sometimes he'd sit up on the roof during his breaks and squint hard at the horizon, pretending he could see souls rising off the earth like waves of heat off pavement in the summer.
SHANNON "Yes, I am." Because they couldn't get him better and he was slowly deteriorating. Shannon was sure that Fairfax had seen his fair share of death since he'd been working there for so long. "Maybe not today or tomorrow but I will soon."
FAIRFAX That was just Fairfax's luck, talking to a dying boy. "I'm going to live for a very long time. I suppose I can't do everything you do." His playful mimicking would have to stop at death. "We are very different, I guess. Even more than I thought."
SHANNON "Well until I go you can keep doing what I do." he touched his finger against his nose and then did the other one, just doing them one at a time and then he smiled, waiting to see if Fairfax would do it too.
FAIRFAX That made him smile, and it illuminated his face, brightening the farthest reaches of it. As he did as Shannon did, Fairfax continued to ask questions. "Are you afraid?"
SHANNON "No, I'm not afraid anymore." When he had first gotten sick he'd been scared but now he just wanted to go and he wanted it to be peaceful but quick. Of course he knew it wouldn't be that way. He'd already been dying for two years and there was no telling how long it would last in the end. "Can we walk down to the cafe? I would like some orange juice."
FAIRFAX Glancing around, the hall they were in was empty, one of the ones that had been shut down due to cutbacks. He knew that once they went to the cafeteria there would be more people, more milling about. While he wanted to remain alone with Shannon, he wouldn't say no. "All right. I'll pretend to be on my break. They won't fire me. The human resources manager is in love with me. Isn't that cute?"
SHANNON "Yes." Shannon smiled and he turned to walk with Fairfax toward the cafeteria. He didnt get to go down there very often because they didn't want to expose him to everyone but he was tired of taking precautions when it didn't get him anywhere. "I don't have any money, do you think they will give me orange juice anyway?"
FAIRFAX He nodded. Fairfax was used to getting whatever he wanted. There was always someone susceptible to his charms. For awhile, before he was , it was how he survived after leaving home. "They charge your insurance company, or your parents a billion dollars--they can give you orange juice."
SHANNON "I hope so." He walked with him towards the cafeteria and he nudged Fairfax a little bit and smield over at the other boy. It was making him happy to have someone to be with for a little while. "Do you work here everyday?"
FAIRFAX "I have Thursdays and Fridays off," he noted. "Sometimes I come in to visit Margie. She has some of the best memories, if you wait long enough for them to show." She was a terminal Alzheirmer's patient. Fairfax would sit with her and show her everything he could do. It was all smoke and mirrors, but often she would laugh so hard she would cry.
SHANNON "I like her. One day she told me that I looked like a sweet boy and then she let me hold her locket with the picture of her daughter in it." He smiled. "She told me I could have it but I told her that I would have it later and that she should keep it until she is really ready to give it to me.'
FAIRFAX "You do look like a sweet boy." Once they got to the cafeteria, Fairfax pulled out a tray. He never ate much, but loved anything sugar-filled. Grabbing a cupcake, he set it on the tray along with a large glass of orange juice he filled from the machine. "She has a box where she keeps newspaper clippings. She must be a hundred. I like her because sometimes I think I can remember things from that far back, even if I'm not that old."
SHANNON "I like to think that I can remember things from that far back. Sometimes I like to pretend that I was places I never really was. Like on the titanic. I was one of the survivors when the ship went down."
FAIRFAX "What is your favorite memory?" Fairfax took them to sit down. No one even asked about money, but the girl behind the counter smiled at them and giggled a little bit. Fairfax could look like anyone's fantasy, if they only wanted to believe.
SHANNON Sitting down with him, Shannon sipped his orange juice and scooted his chair around so he was a little closer to Fairfax. "My favorite memory is when I went to Woodstock and danced in the rain with a girl who had flowers painted on her cheeks."
FAIRFAX "Do you ever leave the hospital? We could go there if you wanted; I can take you anyplace." He liked to think of himself as some sort of living hallucinogen.
SHANNON "I don't leave the hospital, no." Because he wasn't allowed. "At least I haven't in over a year. I'll die here. But at least not in my mind. In my mind I'll die in a field with the sun shining on my face and the wind blowing the tall grass all around me."
FAIRFAX "Will you?" He felt his heart clench in his chest, and he thought it was funny how death looming so close could make a person infinitely alluring. Fairfax pulled his finger through his cupcake, putting a scoop of frosting into his mouth. "I'll come back later tonight and we can go anyplace in the world. Like the ship hidden in the trashcan. You'd be surprised what I can find."
SHANNON That made him smile and he took a bit of the frosting from Fairfax's cupcake and he licked his finger too. "Okay. Come back tonight. The nurses have probably realized I'm gone now and it's only a matter of time before they come to find me."
FAIRFAX "Drink your juice." He said like a worried mother, glad to have really met Shannon instead of just seeing him everyday. He acted as if perhaps the juice would cure him.
SHANNON Drinking the rest of the juice, he put the empty cup down on the tray and he smiled up at Fairfax. "Will you walk me back to my room?" So that he didn't have to walk back on his own.
FAIRFAX Ever so agreeable, Fairfax nodded and finished his cupcake, every once in awhile doing as Shannon did, just to remind him they were still playing that game. Once there he said his goodbyes and drifted off, leaving behind him a profound absence.
SHANNON Crawling back into his bed, Shannon laid down and just let his gaze drift out of the window and into the night. He sighed, feeling lonely now that his friend was gone but he was used to feeling that way.
FAIRFAX It was the last call for visitors, and the nurses station was changing shifts when Fairfax came back. He was grinning excitedly, and climbed up onto Shannon's bed. With him, he had a large canvas napsack, as if he planned to spend the night, or he needed lots of supplies for their adventure. "Wake up." He whispered.
SHANNON They'd given him his pills before he went to bed and when Fairfax came he was drifting in and out of sleep. Opening his eyes, he looked at him and gave him a sleepy smile before closing his eyes again. "Hey."
FAIRFAX Shannon dancing so close to the edge of dreams made Fairfax's skin tingle and shimmer. He couldn't help it and leaned forward to kiss his cheek, except now he wasn't Fairfax, he was a pretty girl with flowers painted on flushed cheeks. The vision was so real, even if Fairfax was still Fairfax.
SHANNON Lifting his hand up, he brushed his finger along her cheek. "Be Fairfax but with flowers on your cheek." Because he thought that would be a better memory than the girl with flowers on her cheek.
FAIRFAX "Real ones?" He laughed, wanting to show off. Petals welled up from the paint, and Fairfax was himself again with purple pansies resting against his skin. "You're dreaming you know. I'm not even real." Because most of the time, that made people more comfortable.
SHANNON "I wish you were real." He let his fingers pass over the flowers and then he dropped his hands back down to his chest. His eyes were still hooded and he closed them for a few long seconds before opening them again. "I wish that you were real."
FAIRFAX "You're not scared of me?" He let the flowers fade, and he was just himself. "People like me, but then they get to know me and they're afraid." Whenever he let them see the real thing anyway.
After which Shannon falls asleep.
|
