http://www.slate.com/articles/double_x/doublex/2015/05/i_loved_breastfeeding_my_first_child_i_couldn_t_wait_to_wean_the_second.html

Breast-feeding mothers looking to troubleshoot the weaning process will find no shortage of advice on parenting websites, which warn of everything from babies’ decreased appetites and sleep changes to the plague known as “fish-fussiness.” Those same resources will plunge into the “enormous sadness” that some weaning mothers feel, but few delve into what troubled me most when I was weaning my second child: What if the predominant emotion is impatience and relief? Because I really wanted to stop nursing my daughter, much more and much earlier than I’d wanted to wean my son, and I felt awful about it. Why did I mourn the loss of a sacred experience the first time around, only to feel over it and done four years later?