••• o j β (cockaigne) wrote in valesco,
@ 2010-08-18 00:29:00

Entry tags:

NOAH
Her hands were shaking. Her hands were shaking. Her hands never shook. In fact, Odette's entire body was shaking, and that had never happened before in her life. Not when she experienced sleep deprivation, certainly not when she was food deprived and never because of any kind of emotional state either. But now, she couldn't even hold the cup of hot liquid Martin had stopped trying to replace into her hands. It would just slip or fall because she couldn't-- think, couldn't breathe, despite finally finding Noah because--- something was wrong, there was something very wrong with him and the Healers---

Odette suppressed a sob as she sunk further into her chair. Martin had gone to contact Noel, as well as everyone else, leaving her alone for the time being. They had found Noah a few hours ago, and since then the Healers had whisked him away and-- nothing. She didn't-- know what to do what could she do? The children asleep, home, despite being jumped around to a new bed practically every night in the past two weeks. And-- and--- her mind couldn't help but jump to what had consumed her during that time.

What could death eaters have possible wanted with Noah? What-- what? What did this mean? Did this mean they weren't safe anymore? That they-- wanted-- was it because of the planetarium? Because he looked at stars all day and night? Or was it-- was it because of her? Because she was a face people recognized? It didn't--- none of it made any sense, and because she had buried her hands into her face, she hadn't noticed a Healer come up to her until she had tapped her on the shoulder.

Jumping up, Odette raced after the Healer showing her the way to Noah's room. Visitors were being permitted, that was a good sign, wasn't it? She couldn't focus on what the Healer was saying to her, even as hard as she tried to watch her lips, it was too difficult. The Healer opened the door too slowly for her taste, and as a result Odette skidded to the only bed in the room so quickly her feet felt dislodged from her body. Noah-- Noah--

"Hi," she choked out, her hand immediately reaching out for his.

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supernoah
2010-08-18 03:48 am UTC (link)

It was hard to do much of anything, and Noah nodded numbly as the healer left the room after saying...something. He hadn't looked any of them in the eye, unless forced by the tips of their wands, and was currently eying the tile of the floor in his room. What time was it? Big Ben had been shining so brightly in his face that he hadn't been able to tell, but had he gone to sleep? He felt like he'd just woken up. Noah couldn't remember much of the evening--

Lyssandra. Lyssandra had been with him, but they'd been separated---she was better than he was, she could---Noah winced as the headaches that seemed to rock through him began their hourly shaking of his already addled brain. He couldn't remember, he couldn't remember anything and he forced his hands into the side of his head to try and get the pain to go away.

When the door opened his hands dropped, as did his gaze. But his hands were taken immediately and Noah's eyes snapped up to look at---her. Oh, he felt his face flush and his hands grew clammy as they tightened around hers. Noah's chest heaved with heavy breaths and he opened his mouth to say something, anything, but all he could manage was another strangled sound.

He frowned and ducked his head, not understanding.

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cockaigne
2010-08-18 04:40 am UTC (link)

What--- what did that mean? She didn't--- she didn't understand. Odette had never wanted to understand what Noah was trying to say to her so much than right now-- and that was saying a lot, considering it seemed like they seemed to speak two different languages at times. She shook her head slowly, her lips repeatedly pulling up in a small smile, then falling back down into a forced frown. She didn't know--- what he had been through, but the Healer had said something about his brain being confused, so-- so--

"It's me," she whimpered, very easily teetering on the edge between breaking out into tears and swallowing everything down. Her hands stayed firmly locked to his, but after a few moments Odette began to move her thumbs across his hands in a rubbing manner. She didn't--- want to alarm him, or confuse him anymore than he already was, so she suddenly felt hard pressed to find something to speak about. Or-- for fuck's sake, for all she knew, he had no bloody idea who she was, or even who he was himself at this moment.

This thought alone opened a floodgate to more unwanted, worser thoughts she had successfully pushed away until now. A fresh set of tears sprung from her face as she wobbled dangerously close to breaking out into sobs. But-- she-- couldn't, she had to control herself if she was going to talk to him.

Shaking her head from side to side, Odette ducked her head low for a few moments to wipe her face against her arm. "I--- I'm sorry, I didn't -- think I would see you again, and-- and now you're here--- " It wasn't the whole reason behind her tears, but still completely true. The last two weeks had been something she had never dared to think of experiencing again.

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supernoah
2010-08-20 12:50 am UTC (link)

It hurt his chest to see her cry like that. Noah's head shook slowly back and forth has his eyes shut tightly. She had to stop crying, she had to stop crying. If she was crying, that meant things were bad, and as much as he ached, he thought it was just from being tired. Nothing but blurs and random images that made his head hurt. Noah gulped, forcing himself to try and speak even though he hadn't said a word since being admitted. Everything had happened so quickly, he had just nodded and taken whatever potions they'd forced upon him.

His tongue felt like it had knotted up in his mouth. Noah felt like he was going to throw up, with how hard he was pushing for a sound that resembled a word to come out, "Lyra---it's bright tonight, did you see?"

Noah blinked, finding his words perfectly acceptable for nearly a minute, until they sank in and he blanched. What--what? What did that--she had no idea Lyra was a constellation, did she? He wanted to ask if the baby was okay, his mind was pressing harder and harder for him to say the right words, but Noah pushed back, muttering again about the constellation, "It's bright, tonight."

Oh, he couldn't focus. Noah shoved himself into the pillows behind him, face heating up as he could not make himself ask how the baby was, how the babies--there were babies. Noah dipped his head as his hands began to shake, "Rigel's not out yet, not till October, not until--then."

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cockaigne
2010-08-21 01:20 am UTC (link)

Odette blinked through her tears, focusing as intensely as she could on Noah. Lyra was... bright? Rigel wouldn't be out until October? What was that supposed to mean? It felt as if she wasn't hearing correctly; the words he had finally spoken were familiar, but not in a way where they added up together to create anything understandable. Her head tilted slightly to the side as she tried to think through her fogged over mind.

Lyra? Rigel? The-- children? But--- he was describing them like a moon or star. Or-- She pulled her lips back tight, knowing that if she reacted wrongly to this, it would only frustrate him more. And--- she didn't want that, she wanted him to calm down and feel safe. Noah wouldn't get better if all she did was make him more stressed out and confused than he already was. Still having relatively no idea what he was trying to say (and let's face it, she had never bragged to be the smartest), Odette simply continued to stare at him blankly.

What could she say? The more she talked to him, the more he would want to respond. Odette's heart sank at that thought. She felt stupid for not understanding him, and even more upset that he had come back like this. What if this never was fixed? What if he would be here forever? What if--- Odette immediately stopped herself, at least having enough common sense to know that thinking about the future now, in a hospital, would only get her more upset in front of him.

"I'm sorry," she whispered, her voice weak and full of confusion. Odette wiped her face on her arm again in another vain attempt to stop herself from looking so pathetic. "I don't--- " It was unbelievable how hard this was. And sad, she felt unrealistically sad. "You don't have to-- to say anything."

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supernoah
2010-08-22 01:34 pm UTC (link)

Say anything! He couldn't say anything! As much as Noah couldn't help the words coming out of his mouth, he knew they were wrong, and it was frustrating beyond belief to know that he couldn't get across what he wanted to say. Not that...it was really just pictures and images floating around in his head. He knew who the woman in front of him was, he knew that he wanted her to be there and he wanted to touch her and would be upset if she left, but---his mind could only see flashes of memories. He couldn't---

Noah couldn't remember her name. He couldn't remember the children's names, he couldn't---he only knew his because of---Lyssandra----Lyssandra.

She'd helped him! Talk to her! "Lyssandra!" he nearly shouted, lurching forward to take her hands. She knew! She helped him! She talked to him and kept him from going completely mad during---Noah's eyes widened as his mind began to flood back some memories of the past few days, and the dark masks and cloaks of those that had tortured them shot to the forefront. But Lyssandra had talked and talked and made him focus on her because she was the only thing in the room that wasn't trying to hurt him and wasn't---

"She aligned----me!" Noah forced out, feeling completely pitiful because he couldn't even give anyone any useful information.

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cockaigne
2010-08-23 12:36 am UTC (link)

She was so taken off guard by Noah's shout that Odette immediately jerked and fell out of her chair because of it. Her eyes flew open wide as she attempted to stay on her feet, but she found that her legs had continued to feel like jelly and her feet still felt disconnected from her body. His grip did more than wonders, however; the strength to become alert had returned to her, as well as the ability to at least stand relatively on her own.

"Lyssandra?" Odette repeated frailly, her knees feeling weak as she stood still. What-- what-- "Lyssandra!" she repeated, this time with much more vigor. Had Noah been with Lyssandra? Because both of them had been in the planetarium! They had been together! So she might be able to--- just as quickly as Odette's heart had shot up with joy, it plummeted back down again. They hadn't found Lyssandra yet or-- as of right now, they didn't know where she was.

"She's not here," Odette began to shake her head slowly, the energy from before beginning to disappear. Her knees buckled for a moment and her weight shifted to rest against the bed. So whatever Lyssandra did--- the verb that was missing was crucial, wasn't it? Or else... Odette pulled one of her arms from Noah's to prop it and burry her face into her open palm. Was this how it was going to be? With him? Just having---- no bloody idea what was going on and guessing the other half of the time?

Odette suddenly felt very deflated. A part of her thought that it might be for the better if she called for a Healer--- but she couldn't. She wanted to stay with him just as much as she wanted to leave,

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