Queen Takes King - [text] Yo Shinigami

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alucard

22 July 2009 @ 11:43 pm

[text] Yo Shinigami

Homosayswhat?

Tags: bawww, dear god, text, walter, wry god wry

42 comments | Leave a comment

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walter on July 23rd, 2009 04:51 am (UTC)

I am taking you off the plan.

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alucard on July 23rd, 2009 05:23 am (UTC)

You're taking off your pants? brt.

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walter on July 23rd, 2009 05:26 am (UTC)

...you are insufferable

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alucard on July 23rd, 2009 05:29 am (UTC)

You're suffocating? Well I know it's big, but aren't you being a little dramatic?

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walter on July 23rd, 2009 05:32 am (UTC)

STOP TYPING BEFORE I TAKE YOUR BLOODY FINGERS OFF ONE BY ONE AND SHOVE THEM DOWN YOUR THROAT

ALSO HOW DO I TURN CAPS OFF I CAN'T STOP THEM THIS IS VERY ANNOYING

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alucard on July 23rd, 2009 05:35 am (UTC)

Mmm, somebody's frisky tonight. <3

Come down here and I'll show you how to turn them off. And what else you can shove down my thro-- LOL sorry, I almost spit out wine on my phone. LOL you topping.

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walter on July 23rd, 2009 05:38 am (UTC)

ONE OF THESE DAYS YOU ARE GOING TO EAT EVERY ONE OF THESE WORDS YOURE TYPING NOW I WILL SEE TO THAT ALUCARD

EVERY SINGLE ONE

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alucard on July 23rd, 2009 05:44 am (UTC)

Somebody had delusions of grandeur.

btw, caps lock gives me wood. Keep talking.

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walter on July 23rd, 2009 05:50 am (UTC)

DON'T MAKE ME LAUGH WE BOTH KNOW THAT YOU LIKE BLOWING SMOKE

AMONGST OTHER THINGS

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alucard on July 23rd, 2009 05:54 am (UTC)

Damn.

Was it good for you, baby? <3

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walter on July 23rd, 2009 06:01 am (UTC)

fuck you arthur showed me how to turn the caps off

thanks for nothing

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alucard on July 23rd, 2009 06:06 am (UTC)

A little late, but thanks for the enthusiasm. If you'd like round two, you'll have to wait. God, I'm not a machine, Walter.

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walter on July 23rd, 2009 06:42 am (UTC)

is everything sexual innuendo with you

is NOTHING SACRED

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alucard on July 23rd, 2009 06:49 am (UTC)

It's not my fault that you want me so much that it laces itself in everything you say.

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walter on July 23rd, 2009 07:07 am (UTC)

one of these days you'll get your head out of your ass long enough to see the world as it really is

you know

where youre actually a piece of shit and no one wants to fuck you as badly as you think they do, if at all ever

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alucard on July 23rd, 2009 07:13 am (UTC)

That's not what your daughter thinks.

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walter on July 23rd, 2009 07:17 am (UTC)

[there's no response until walter walks into the basement, rails Alucard in the face, then walks back up the stairs.

five minutes later, a text message:]

excuse me did you say something

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alucard on July 23rd, 2009 07:18 am (UTC)

Round five?

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walter on July 23rd, 2009 07:22 am (UTC)

[silence; the basement door opens and walter chucks the phone AT ALUCARD'S HEAD then slams the door shut.]

Bloody cocker.

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alucard on July 23rd, 2009 07:39 am (UTC)

[He rubs his head where a giant red spot is forming, calling after him.]

Come on, baby, I just wanna love you!

[He notices there's likely not going to be an answer and gives Walter's phone to Kevin, where they exchange dirty text messages for the next eight solid hours.]

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alucard on July 23rd, 2009 06:26 am (UTC)

A sandwich would be awesome about now, though.

Less bitchin more kitchen.

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