Dirk never wanted to be this close to his Great Aunt Lucille ever again. His face was nearly pressed into her back, which wasn't really her back because he was so short so it really was the top of her---bottom and he was going to puke. PUKE! But! But incredibly, it was better than the alternative, because the alternative was letting his little cousin give him a 'makeover.'

He was a boy! Hedidnotneedamakeover!

"Errggh!" he let out as Great Aunt Lucille stopped and forced Dirk to get even more uncomfortably close. This was his cue to stop hiding behind really large women and...to duck under a table. Yes, that would be a good hiding spot for now, Delana would never want to get her dress dirty by having to crawl on the grass to get him.

He slid under the table with the jello molds and planted himself on the grass. Dirk was glad he was small for his age, because then this hiding spot wouldn't be as good as it was turning out to be. He usually hated when his mum commented on how much taller his cousins were than he, but Dirk liked being him, and that was what mattered. He didn't think it would make much sense to not like yourself, because...it wasn't like you could trade your body for a supposedly 'cooler' one.

Except he'd probably be okay with being Derek for a day or two. Derek was awesome.

Anyway, there were ants under the table, and Dirk liked ants. He liked all kinds of creatures really, especially the ones in fairy tales. Of course, that was silly because if there were dragons out there, all the scientists would've named them after themselves already, and if there were flying horses, they would be pulling carriages across London or something awesome like that. It didn't cross Dirk's mind at all that the idea of these creatures was silly because they were made up, it was silly simply because no one had bothered to discover them yet.

"And then the dragon swooped down and grabbed the princess, 'Help me, help me Prince Dirk!'" The sticks that had become a dragon, princess, and a prince thrashed at each other mercilessly, Dirk adding sound effects to his battle.

"Dirk!" a voice called, causing the boy to startle out of his adventures and knock his head on the underside of the table. He looked around and saw his great uncle Theodore poking his head under the tablecloth. "What are you doing down there?"

"Playing magic," he said, crawling out from under the table. He stood and opened his hands, showing off the sticks that had once been dragons and princes, wizards and witches, "It's silly."

"What's silly?" Uncle Theodore said, a wide smile on his face, "Magic?"

Dirk nodded, blushing deeply. His mum always told him to stop making things like his games up, but he couldn't help it--the thoughts just seemed so real. "Mama says it isn't real."

The old man's smile dropped, and he reached out to pull Dirk onto his knee, "Magic is very real, Dirk."

"Really!" the boy let out, his eyes brightening, "So, there are dragons and stuff? And goblins?"

"Yes!" Uncle Theodore exclaimed, "And flying broomsticks, and wizards and flying horses!"

Dirk's mouth dropped wide; just like he'd imagined! "Wow..."

"Now, go run along---you'll get to see all the real magic one day."

Dirk gave his great uncle a hug before rushing off, his arm high in the air as his dragon sticks needed to soar once again. He found his cousin Derek, who was shooting a basketball in the driveway.

"Derek, Derek, Uncle Theodore says there is magic," he let out excitedly, avoiding being hit by the ball that had just gone through the hoop. Derek caught up to the bouncing ball and gave Dirk a skeptical look.

"Uncle Theodore's also a crazy old coot," he said with a grin, taking another shot. Dirk blinked a few times and dropped his sticks, rushing onto the driveway to try and steal the ball from Derek. He definitely wouldn't go on about magic if Derek didn't think it was real.

He'd just have to wait to get back home to his room. There his adventures could start.

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It was a very poor decision on Dirk's part to wear a headband that dangled a piece of mistletoe over his head. He had thought it was funny, and hadn't actually believed that people would take it as an invitation to actually kiss him! Did people not understand jokes? Why would he try and be so bold and basically force people to be stuck in a situation like standing under mistletoe!

Dirk dropped miserably down into his chair, and decided he was not going to leave his cubicle for the rest of his day. He'd gotten at least thirteen kisses already, and it wasn't even lunch time! Didn't these women have any shame? Dirk had even told them it was absolutely unnecessary for them to follow through with the supposed 'punchline' of his joke, but no one seemed to be bothered by it. Bertha Jorkins had kissed him twice, she thought it was so funny.

He swiped the headband off of his head and threw it across his desk in a slight fit of annoyance. Dirk did not appreciate his personal space being invaded, and he'd definitely had a lot of that today. Some of those older women were really handsy! He should file a report, they should not think that simply because it was the holidays that they were allowed to grab him in such manners---

"Why is it that you are kissing people?"

Dirk's head shot up toward the voice and stood up quickly at the sight of Zora Krum. Her eyebrows were raised high, and she leaned one hand on the side of his cubicle. Dirk attempted to straighten up, but he was so flustered from the whole day that he slouched and reached over for the mistletoe headband. He stuck it back on his head and pointed a stiff finger at the dangling leaves and berries.

"Because of this stupid thing," he said with a sigh, "Everyone's taking advantage of me!"

Zora's eyes narrowed to examine the mistletoe, and she took a step into the cubicle to get a closer look. Her hand rose to touch the tip of it, and Dirk felt his eyes cross with how focused he was on her face. Zora always made it very hard to concentrate on anything besides her, and now she was inside his cubicle. She was nearly giving him a headache with how her perfume was making his head spin.

"Why, why is this plant so powerful?" she asked, dropping her hand and resting it on her hip. "You should not be using magic to make people kiss you."

"It's not magic," Dirk defended himself, "It's tradition! If you're standing under the mistletoe, that's the little plant thing here," he swatted it with a finger and watched the plant swish back and forth in front of his eyes, "You and the other person gotta kiss. I thought it was funny, but people take things so literally around here!"

Zora seemed to contemplate his response, and Dirk's eyes widened to triple their normal size when she took a small step forward, positioning herself directly under the mistletoe. "We are both under the meesletow?"

"Er----yes."

"But you do not like when people take things the serious way?"

"I---" Dirk swallowed roughly. Boy, he really wanted to kiss her. Why had he said all that dumb stuff about not wanting people to follow through? That was just plain stupid! "I think---one more time could be okay."

Zora smiled before pushing up on her toes and kissing him. Dirk felt like his eyeballs were going to roll back into his head at the sensation, and his hands went to her shoulders to steady himself. And pull her closer. He really couldn't help what he was doing, she was just so pretty, and smart, and wearing great perfume, and kissing him in his cubicle.

Boy, oh boy, this was what office day dreams were made of.

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