| Like the rumble of distant thunder |
[Apr. 22nd, 2008|10:10 am] |
I haven’t had an epiphany since I was eight, and that instance in hindsight I attribute to the tunnel vision of the wishful thinker.
Most of my life I have known the crux of any given question, the process was more of resolution rather than revelation, things like the doubts and gut level intuition of any given situation being held in reserve until supporting data tipped the balance, even though resolved as often expected, there is always the probability for the exception.
Desire will often cloud and constrain ones view and often evidence to the contrary will be ignored, in many aspects of life,... Things like fear and hope can easily place blinders on ones periphery, how often has the prospect of love loomed before us and we become lost to the dazzle of it missing the obvious clues that would expose that what in the guise of love, was really but an act of ego.
Many things pass before us and not every mistaken vision is malicious in intent, because it seems with the human condition confusion is the norm ,... Many a drifting spirit will seek handholds to keep them from being swept from that which they hold dear, but life’s currents run deep and strong, few can disregard it’s pull, even though there are those who create the anchor of illusion to convince themselves that they have accomplished that very task.
The choices we make in the way we deal with any particular castle dissolving into the mist are as individual as the witness,... Anger denial, and other distractions give the time to scrabble for new footholds that allow the journey to continue, because the other option is demise, and that is seldom viewed as an option,... forge ahead, perhaps even bearing the broken debris of the past which are carried forward in an unrepentant resolve to hold on to the work of the past, and in defense of this sometimes the odd bits that seem useless to others could very well become the means to the next summit.
For me I embrace the current and hold no vision to it’s purpose or objective,... The flotsam and jetsam of past loves and endeavors travel with me,... I embraced the chaos of this river long ago, and whether it carries me to a greater sea, or dumps into an endless abyss matters not,... The imminent before me will color the light of my days like the reflected light from a brilliant flower,... Like the doppler shift from distant stars, outline the darkness of the shadows of night, I will take that which is available and bask in it’s treasure.
Fear and avarice are banished from me, for in them I have beheld the weight that draws one to the bottom of the rift, the current still flows, but the sharp edges of random obstacles threaten every passing tide.
That all answers are before me I duly distrust, for in the realm of learning the one evident truth is that the more one knows the more unknown is yet revealed. |
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