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Hayes, 2.1





When I come back to play Camille's house I find she is making(literally) new friends.



Camille: CAN I TELL YOU A SECRET, FROSTY?!



She made another snowman buddy!



...and ANOTHER one.





Camille stayed up all night talking and chatting with her new snowmen buddies and almost froze to death.



PENGUIN + CAMILLE = BFFZ. Y/N?



I'm not entirely sure why, but I think Camille has some fetish for the ~hardcore~ menz. There was Pirate, Gothic Elf Dude, Octogenarian Biker and this dude. His name is Dominic.





MY GOD ALMOST EVERY DUDE SHE LIKES HAS SOME GNOME STEALING OBSESSION.

Except Dominic looks a little...excited about stealing Jerome. UR SUCH A HARDCORE MAN U GNOME STEALER!







Dominic also proceeded to DESTROY ALL OF CAMILLE'S FRIENDS.

What is Camille doing through all of this?



Seriously?



Dominic: A WOMAN'S NAKED BODY ~OOOOOOOOOOOOOO~



I guess that shower scene got Dominic all hot and bothered.



Camille: OHAI IT'S VURRY NICE TO MEET YOU.

Guys, Camille has resorted to making out with random strangers. GIRL IS GETTING DESPERATE. D:



Her reputation as what? A SLUT WHO MAKES OUT WITH RANDOM MEN BECAUSE JEROME THE GNOME DOESN'T SEEM INTERESTED?



Yeah, that pre-sexin' face is definitely boner inducing, Camille.



After stealing her gnome, destroying her snowmen, and having sex with her, Dominic believes that his work is done and leaves.



These are Camille's needs. Not in very good shape, yes?





A+ PRIORITIES, GRRRRRRL.



Camille: I approve of this Ball of Stink following me around. I LIKE NEW FRIENDZ.
Ball of Stink: ......:D





Camille usually has nightmares of humans, because she's insane...and she doesn't really like real people all too much. WHY WOULD SHE, SHE HAS ~*~*GNOMES*~*~!



Since she lost all of her other snowmen bffz, Camille makes some more friends.



OKAY. When a sim pops and makes THAT face, you know that baby is screwed.



GEEZ, WOMAN. STOP GETTING YOURSELF FROZEN BECAUSE YOU WANT TO TALK TO YOUR CREEPY SNOWMAN BUDDIES.







Camille has "OMG I THINK I WET MYSELF" nightmares about...meeting exterminators?



Cam may have made new snowmen buddies, but girl still stays true to Jerome the Gnome.



Camille: LOLOLOL HAI JEROME, I THINK I NEED A PAINTING IN THIS DEPRESSING SHITHOLE I CALL MY HOUSE. WHAT DO YOU THINK?!?



Jerome the Gnome: I THINK I SAW THE HEAD.



Camille: LOLOLOL YOU SO CRAZY!



Camille: HAI WANNA MOVE IN WITH ME SO YOU CAN GET TO KNOW THE CHILD I HAVE IN MY UTERUS WHICH IS YOURS I CAN TELL BECAUSE IT KICKS EXTRA HARD WHEN I LISTEN TO METALLICA.
Dominic: OH HALE NO.



He eventually agreed after a drugging process to move in anyway. He is not pleased with this shit.



Dominic Gray
Fortune: Earn 100,000 Simoleons!!!!!!!! (Good luck with that one, bud.)



Dominic rolled the want(YES HE ACTUALLY *WANTED* THIS) to propose to Camille, so..he did.



Camille didn't though.

Camille: Ehhhhhhhhhhh, no thx.



Wow, Camille. Way to completely ruin your any chance at a relationship with someone other than old biker dude.



Camille: MROW WHO IS THAT SEXY SEXY MAN?!
Dominic: *MINUS MINUS*



After that whole awkward engagement scene, Camille decides to give birth. Great timing, you has it, Camille.



Dominic: OH WRRRRRRRRRRRRRRY NOW THIS BABY WILL BE BORN OUT OF WEDLOCK!!!!!





As you can see, Dominic is STOKED about being a new father!

...It was a girl named Gabrielle. She has s1, green eyes and brown hair.



Ooh, look who's back. Gnome Plundering Pirate!



They attempted MANY TIMES to try for a baby. I guess Gnome Plundering Pirate is sterile.



Camille: Y HALLO THAR, SEXY PIRATE. WANNA HAVE SOME COUCH SEX WITH ME? *PLUS* *PLUS*



Gabrielle: SOMEONE CHANGE ME, I HATE THE FEELING OF FECES AGAINST MY BUTT CHEEKS.



Camille: LOL BRB GOTTA GO STEAL MY GNOME BACK.



You know what? I don't think Gabrielle would want to play with you. You care more about a gnome.



Camille: HEY. I can use this baby powder I found in the trash on Gabrielle!!!!

Uh, so you can make her diaper rash even WORSE?





I don't know about you guys, but I think these two are pretty kickass parents.



Camille thinks the flies swarming around her accentuates her ~beautiful and magical~ body odor.



She also thinks eating garbage prevents halitosis.



Gabrielle: OH FUCK SHE'S HAVING ANOTHER ONE?!!?



I understand Gabrielle's concern. These two dumbasses can't even feed THEMSELVES properly.



So, I really don't care much for infancy, so it usually goes by quickly for me.



Gabrielle is pretty damn adorable...which irritates Camille somehow?



WHAT A PICTURE PERFECT (and NOT traumatizing) FAMILY.



I think Gabrielle is hogging the toilet so Camille can know how it feels to lay around with wet pants. CAMILLE IS GETTING HER KARMA.



Camille: MAN, YOU'RE SO HOT THAT I WANT TO WET MYSELF~
Dominic: .......Ewwwwww.



OH MAN.



NOT AGAIN.





Dominic expresses much concern about his wife's mental instability, CLEARLY.



Dominic: GOD CAN SHE GO BE CRAZY SOMEWHERE ELSE I WANT TO CLEAN THAT COUNTER.



Gooooooooood job, Camille. ALSO SHIT I FORGOT TO BUY THEM A FIRE ALARM. D:





DON'T JUST STAND THERE CALL THE FIREMEEEEEEEEEN.



WTF CAMILLE, WHO IN THEIR RIGHT MIND (Oh wait..I get it now) PASSES OUT IN A RAGING FIRE?



How they FUCK did they get in the fire? I TOLD THEM TO CALL THE FIREMEN THE PHONE IS IN THE LIVING ROOM. DDDDDDDD:



Shit. Shit. Shit. SHIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIT.



Okay, stop crying, Dominic. You can still save her, just stop crying.



THE FIRE IS OVER. STOP DOING THAT. SAVE CAMILLE.



I hate him.



No, really. I HATE HIM.



dothesmustle: *loathes*



So.....I cheated.





Dominic: I just resurrected my girlfriend. :|

...Yeah at least Camille is excited?



Well. That moment of (kind-of) happiness lasted long.



They have to be good friends by now. I think she's met with the therapist over five times.





There is honestly no chance in any of generation two being normal.



Dominic: OSNAP I JUST HAD A REALLY BAD NIGHTMARE THAT I LIVED WITH THIS CRAZY WOMAN WHO SPOKE TO GNOMES AND SHE DIED IN A FIRE AND THEN I RESCUED HER AND ... *Slowly looks over to the right...*



Dominic: ...shit. That really happened.



Dominic: *mental breakdown*
Camille: LOL I JUST HAD ONE OF THOSE.



Gabrielle: FUCK YOU, DAD. MOM WAS SUPPOSED TO BE THE BATSHIT ONE.



Meanwhile, Camille has gone way over the deep end. She thinks Jerome the Gnome...is her child.

Really, where is this straight jacket? There HAS to be one.





Gabrielle: I HATE MY LIIIIIIIIIIIIIIFE.



Why are you SO SO SMART, Camille? HOW CAN I LEARN TO BE LIKE YOU?!



Jerome the Gnome caught on fire as well. What are the elements trying to tell me?



So then Camille gives birth in her underwear on the front lawn, with only Jerome to watch.



Gabrielle is busy head...cribbing?



By the time Dominic makes it there, he shows his excitement for babies being born again. This guy just loves children.







DFJHDF7854THO54FKDJFKDJDFKFJDKFJDFKGJUY58

TRIPLETS. AGAIN.

Noah, Olive, and ...Malcolm. Right. Malcolm.



Dominic takes action and starts begging people for money. He should, though. They have 33 dollars in the bank.



WHAT KIND OF PARENTS? This is Camille and Dominic, we should be luck she hasn't died yet.



Camille, Jerome is not real. You cannot throw your children at him and expect them to be taken care of.



Gabrielle: Please, for the love of GOD, CHANGE MY DIAPER.
Dominic: NOOOOO STOP STRESSING ME OUTTTTTT.



This family is real and true trailer trash. This picture represents it all.



Rotten and half-eaten slice of pizza, unpaid bills, and a dirty diaper on the floor. Not to mention they all freely walk on their lawn in nothing but their underwear.



Also, let me show you what a WRECK their house is right now. D:



Camille still has nightmares, but she looks like she's almost smirking when she wakes up from them. What kind of dreams are you REALLY having of that old lady in your thought bubble?



I have high hopes for you, Gabrielle. I really do.



Camille: CRYYYYYYYYYYYYY I HATE MY LIIIIIIIIIIFE. ;_______;



Honestly, who is letting the babies get outside?





This family is COMPLETELY FUNCTIONAL. I do not know what you're talking about.



It looks like Dominic has resorted to whoring Camille out for some simoleons.

Will Camille and Dominic actually get promotions so they will actually be able to afford cribs? Will the children actually have toys instead of Camille throwing them at Jerome the Gnome thinking he talks to babies? WILL CAMILLE LEARN HOW TO JUMPROPE?!

That ends this update. It's pretty long, but seriously so much happened. Everyone is always in 457847 motive failures and everything is just CHAOTIC. D: