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Izuna Application Pt. 5 (AND DONE. ;A;)
Sample Post:

First Person

If I could have everyone's attention, please.

While we value the input and concerns of each and every one of our employees here at Feel Good, I would like to bring attention to the fact that there is no phone line that is dedicated to this purpose. There is a box up on the administration floor and lovely little cards to fill out and put in there. We even provide you with a pen. I assure you, every one of those slips will be read on a weekly if not daily basis.

All of you currently calling the aforementioned phone line, please stop. That is my office line, and I don't have time to listen to you crying and composing yourself before bringing the problem to actual coherent attention. I am also not a counselor, so I'm afraid I will not have any advice for any of you about personal matters, either.

If you would like me to have a phone line to call payroll so we can all be paid in a timely fashion, cease and desist.

Third, manicures and waxes are not covered as a work expense, so you four that have left me receipts for your salons? You have until the end of the day to take them back before I shred them for your privacy and throw them out.

Thank you for your time.


Third Person

Not a single thing that sex can't sell.

Madara had been so proud of himself when he handed Izuna the leaflet a few hours ago, which upon further inspection was ordered wrong anyway, but Izuna didn't have the heart to tell his brother that. He would have, if he'd realized what had just been put into his hands.

Behind the safety of his desk in his (thankfully) private office, Izuna rubbed at the bridge of his nose in agitation. His glasses were already set aside on the desk after the second read-over of the details of some endorsement deal Madara had O.K.'ed and gone through with before even giving him a hint. Why didn't anyone tell Madara that it was a bad idea to fill an entire pool with soda? His brother graduated from the same school system as he did, right? It should be common knowledge that sugar was a bad thing to put in or near.. Certain places of the female anatomy, no matter how healthy and disease-free she may be. Not to mention it was carbonated sugar.

He let out a long, tired sigh, flipping to the release forms of all who were involved in the commercial or magazine ad or whatever it was going to be. Well, at least Madara had remembered to get these forms filled out, or they would have been royally fucked. He'd have to give all of these girls a call and have them come in for tests. Anyone who got into the pool would have to be apologized to (even if they signed the stupid form and should have known this anyways, it was common decency) and directed to visit their doctor as soon as possible.

'Well, there's one thing sex can't sell.' He mused darkly, picking up the phone and getting ready for a good hour or two of being shrilled at while he broke the news.

'Yeast infections.'