NAME; Karissa.
WHAT DO YOU GO BY?; Kari, Kari Safari, Kogle, Irak, Iraq, Assirak, Roo, Rissa, Rissa Roo, Kdoke, Doker, Doke, The Divine Almighty One, She Whose Name Makes Warriors Scramble Away In Sheer Desperation.
HOW IS 'KARI' PRONOUNCED?; Like a car, the vroom vroom kinda thing, you know? But with an "EEEEE" at the end. Like, "kah-ree". My mom named me Karissa for the sole purpose of using the nickname Kari, said exactly like that. It's been what everyone's called me (unless they were an angry close family member) since I popped out of the womb. In all actuality, I'm beginning to wish I was just called Karissa. It sounds more mature or something, but after so many years, I can't even answer to it. So, Kari (kah-ree) it is.
OKAY, SO, WHY HITLER?: Why not?
HOW MANY YEARS HAVE YOU BEEN BREATHING?; Nineteen.
ROUGH LOCATION?; Pennsylvania.
HEIGHT?; An intimidating 5 foot nothing.
HAIR COLOR?; Naturally blonde, dyed all sorts of colors.
EYE COLOR?; Blue. Really, super-dee-freaking-duper blue. So blue, in fact, that you have to get in pretty close to see that it's blue and not some other dark color. It's a dark blue. Yeah, that's about right. Dark blue.
CONTACTS OR GLASSES?; Y'know, I'm not gonna lie, I tried contacts once, but only for the sole purpose of wearing sunglasses. Unfortunately, I missed my regular glasses a ridiculous amount. Yeah, I had this pair of thick, black-rimmed Donald Trump glasses for the longest time. Men's. I couldn't find anything else I liked, and they were just fabulous. Finally, though, I got myself a new pair! They're super snazzy, come with these real-looking clip on sunglasses. Suh-weet.
FAVORITE COLOR EVER, AMEN?; Green or yellow. I always liked earthy tones.
YOUR SCREENNAME LOOKS LIKE MUMBO JUMBO. EXPLAIN?; If you're a Foo Fighters fan, it should be self explanatory. If not, don't worry about it! It's not a big deal, y'know?
YOUR BEST IRL FRIEND?; Sarah! We've been friends since I moved here in sixth grade. We've been through just about everything. You want some interestingly embarrassing stories? ASK! There's a ton. Her dad owns a Saab dealership so we've never been short on money.
YOUR BEST ONLINE FRIEND?; I'm not getting into this! Do you really think I would reduce the online world to tears, thinking I favored one over the rest? No! I am not some sort of heartless beast!
HOW ABOUT A BOYFRIEND, GOT ONE OF THOSE?; Yup! Since 2005, I've been with a freaking awesome guy named Chris. He's tough as hell, which I love, and he definitely looks like it. I mean, he's ACTUALLY sort of a big carebear, but no one else really sees that but me, I guess, so he'll keep right on looking like a scary guy. He's six foot something, 200 and some pounds, and he can make a fist about the size of my head (they called him Mammoth Paws in high school). But seriously, he's real freaking cute and I love him to death.
DO YOU DRINK/SMOKE?; I smoke cigarillos and the occasional cigarette and I drink in moderation.
HOW ABOUT SIBLINGS?; Two sisters! Ashley and Amanda. The one is 21, a struggling actress, the other is 17, a cocky little son of a gun. Yeah, I'm Kari. In the middle. And I look nothing like either of them or my mom, but I DO look like my stepdad, who is obviously of no relation. Weird, huh? I always thought so.
SO WHERE'S YOUR DAD?; At work! But if you mean my biological father, he's somewhere in Georgia, but he's dead if we're lucky!
WHAT GROSSES YOU OUT MORE THAN ANYTHING?; Absolutely everything. I'm not even exaggerating.
WHAT DO YOU PLAN TO DO WITH YOURSELF?; I'm not sure!
CELEBRITY HEROES?; DAVE GROHL. I mean, come on, who rocks harder?
AUTHOR HEROES?: Vonnegut, hands fucking down, man.
OPTIMIST OR PESSIMIST?; Realist. |
