Astoria's seeing that--oh, dear
Tim!
You will never believe--- to distraught to write properly and cross things out, just so you are aware---
Daphne just told me the most bizarre—and franklyhorrible thing! I can't believe we didn't know! Astoria has been seeing (as in romantically, as in—oh, I can't even delve into details) that Malfoy boy. I will allow time for you to express whatever emotion you are experiencing right now (rage and/or suffering from a panic attack are preferred).
…
Now, Narcissa is a dear friend of mine, this much is true. I cannot abide by her husband, however, and in what universe, I ask of you, is their son worthy enough to court our daughter? DRACO MALFOY. No!, Tim, what if they do get seriously engaged? Astoria Malfoy, that doesn't roll off the tongue at all, she'll have to keep her maiden name.
Oh, who am I fooling, I can't stand Narcissa half the time! And I mean, what sort of girl finds a bratty boy with slicked back hair attractive! Of course, I'm happy he's clearly able to provide for her, and of course, my parents will be positively pleased, and are no doubt planning some sort of elaborate engagement for their precious granddaughter already, but! Tim! YOU NEED TO COME HOME RIGHT NOW, I AM DISTRAUGHT AND I DON'T WANT MY DAUGHTER TO LEAVE AND—VERY BAD
FROM YOUR WIFE
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