Attention all employees:

Yesterdays apparent "virus," was nothing more than food poisoning, brought on by an expired bin of dairy creamer. The company has been contacted for printing a false date on the container, and I can assure you everything is perfectly safe to drink now. If you have any lingering health issues because of it, please take it to our in-house doctor. Do not yell at our baristas. They had nothing to do with it, and have been instructed to spray you with hot coffee if you whine.

We're very sorry for any inconvenience this may have caused, and while filming will go on as usual today, if you have any issues performing, please tell the director to come to me about it.

Thank you.

( Private to Sasori )

(( ooc: after watching the security tapes all night, izuna and madara found out just what it was sasori did. though madara is using food poisoning as a cover, so his sole revenge can be exacted >O ))