A good sized manila envelope:



--addressed to Minato Namikaze will arrive in the mail today. He should know already what it is. >:|

( OH BUT WHAT'S INSIDE )

The Nintendo DSi is an amazing piece of technology, with all sorts of enhanced graphics, a webcam, and etc etc blahblah. I'm not selling you one, so I can skimp on the details of it. But I am giving one away, brand new in box with the plastic wrap still on. While playing Cooking Mama, I noticed some of the touch pad features really aren't being used to the extent they could be. For all the games the DS offers, how is it that few of them are sex related? Here's what I have in mind, a game that not only lets you use the touchscreen to pull panties off and rub exciting places, but that also uses the webcam feature to snap photos of yourself and pastes them in with FGI employees so you can be the best stalker ever. Of course, you'd be pulling the clothes off our employees as well.

And here's what I want you to do. The problem is, as I'm told by several Nintendo representatives as well as top game developers, that there simply isn't a market large enough for one of these games that they'd be willing to "sully" Nintendo's name. Well I say that's bullshit, so I've created a petition. I want 50,000 signatures. The average price of a DS game is around $30, and with a guaranteed 50,000 buyers at the least, that's $1,500,000 profit. And I'm sure more than 50,000 copies will sell, because it's sexy. What I want my employees to do is help me gather these signatures, digitally and in person, by whatever means possible. Secure the sale, no matter what.

The employees who gather the most signatures (They have to be real people, too. Don't lie to me.) will each win a brand new DSi as well as a game bundle, that even has Cooking and Gardening Mama.

For a copy of the petition complete with company clipboards and pens, please head to Human Resources, where you will also find a more detailed copy of the rules and methods that will be in effect for this mission. I trust you'll all do me proud. I believe in you.

Furthermore, I will answer any questions or concerns you may have. If you have objections, I'd like to see you just try to argue them.

Thank you and good luck.

Sorry this is late to the party but tomorrow (Monday) morning, Naruto will find the following gifts outside his employee locker. And because I'm lazy, his gift from Gaara is in this post too.

( From Madara )

( From Gaara )

For the past two days, areas around the building have been sporadically losing electricity. I'm aware some of you have lost work, and I'm also aware it's an annoyance and hindrance to schedules. We are working to address the issue as quickly as possible.

Until then, please continue to work efficiently, and save your work often.

(( ooc: yaay, company event. feel free to torture them with lost work, elevator jams, etc etc etc. madara will update again when the outages are solved, so go crazy. ))

Just so you all know, your lovely boss has been arrested.

DETAILS HERE!

For the record, this was sparked on by this conversation with Itachi. Madara had to go lay the smack down on three assholes who dared to mess with Itachi. >| Based off Itachi's descriptions, Madara hired a private investigator to hunt them down, and once names and locations were acquired, he set out. To keeeeel.

Madara is currently hiding out at Hashirama's house, and has a few injuries (busted lip, torn-up knuckles, bruised ribs, and various bruises around his body) caused by when the guys fought back. He'll remain hidden for a few days, letting his injuries heal and the DRAMA!!1 settle. He may or may not answer his phone, depending on who is calling and what for.

Press will likely be lurking around the company, trying to dish up scoops. So this affects you all. :( Sasori, especially you. :D

Wherever Sasuke'd find it, he's got a present from Madara waiting today.

( No, it isn't a pony. ): )

Today Naruto will find the following inside his employee locker:

( A letter )

( and a box wrapped in lamb wrapping paper. )