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I'm going to Hogwarts tomorrow and I'm largely considering the option of never coming back.
By the way, Muggleborn students, I'm Professor Potter and I'll be your Charms professor for as long as this fucking idioti---fuck, I can't curse in front of the kids, can I---damnit, that's going to be a problem ridiculous new act is still in effect. I look forward to teaching you all this school year.
James, can you come and hold my hand? I'm afraid I forgot to buy toothpaste at the store and I might get murdered by Voldemort on the way.
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