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my_boy_jack ([info]my_boy_jack) wrote,
@ 2009-06-22 03:01:00


Previous Entry  Add to memories!  Tell a Friend!  Next Entry
October 1949


Jack Davis was never one to rock the boat. Sure, things had changed a little when he’d enlisted, but the moment he came home, everything was expected to go back to normal. He was alone in his family’s home, his sisters and brother off on their own.

It was as lonely as it had ever been—large and empty and stiff, about as inviting as a mortuary. Tall white pillars loomed in front of a solid brick face, an elegant ivory-covered door centered between rows of large glass windows, each adorned with a pair of shutters, dark green ivy pulling them in.

Daily, he walked up and down the intimidating grand staircase, pushed off to the side of a marble-floored foyer, a showy chandelier lighting the steps. Most of his days were spent alone, even at the young age of twenty-eight—it seemed that Jack was lost easily here, in more ways than one.

Ignoring the doorbell was second-nature to him—actually, he’d never answered a goddamn doorbell in his life. Besides, it was never for him, which meant there was no need to disturb himself.

… Then again, there wasn’t ever much to disturb in the first place. He read, he listened to programs on the radio, occasionally sat outside on the back porch. Finished with school—something his parents had forced him to do when he had returned—and waiting to take over the family business, there wasn’t much he could do. Today, though, he painted—as he did every Thursday afternoon. His parents disapproved, of course, but found no harm in it, as long as he kept up his end of the deal when the time came.

But when the doorbell rang, it was Victor that answered—the Davis family’s… serviceman, of sorts. Pulling the door open, he greeted the guest with a face void of all expression. “May I help you?” was all the old man said, hand on the doorknob.



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[info]bombsaway
2009-06-23 08:09 am UTC (link)
Sam Doubletree's idea of New York used to be the bars, the dances, the chicks he could pick up in the guise of normalcy. It was exciting, vibrant, big, and so far away from the dusty, empty landscape of his childhood back in Texas. Now, however, and when he heard about his weekend of leave in the city, he only thought of one thing. Well, one person, really.

He thought too much into it. He wrote him a letter months earlier, letting him know where he'd be, but never heard back. Maybe it didn't reach him, maybe it wasn't even sent after all, maybe they were still blacking out locations and names of army letters like they were during the war. But the war was a long time ago, and so was the time when Sam had last been with Jack Davis.

After getting his nerve, which was always harder when Jack was involved, Captain (yes, still Captain) Doubletree made his way to the town he addressed his letters to, by train and then by foot, to save money. Now and then he stopped to ask for directions, until he found his way to a nicer neighborhood, looking for numbers painted on mailboxes. And then, he found it.

The Texan laughed sheepishly as he looked at the mansion, knowing that despite all his airs of grandeur and accomplishment, pretending to have an upbringing better than he did in reality, he would never fit into this world. Ivy didn't grow in Houston, at least not where Sam's family lived, and columns were a thing for the oil baron's estates. He took off his uniform hat, shoving it in the back pocket of his slacks, and looked at the walkway leading to the front door very, very carefully, as if he wasn't allowed to step on it too hard, as if he had to carry out his steps according to a certain etiquette.

He wasn't going to think about what he planned on saying to Jack after all these years, he wasn't going to go to a rehearsed way of behaving, trying to impress Jack, he was just going to go see an old pal from the Army. He wasn't going to psych himself out.

However, after ringing the doorbell and having a man who wasn't Jack answer, that seemed to psych him out even more than he himself did thinking about this meeting. Sam cleared his throat and nodded, "This the Davis hou-. . .residence?" he said, thinking that sounded better than house.

Never mind if he couldn't escape his thick as molasses Texas accent.

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[info]my_boy_jack
2009-06-23 01:16 pm UTC (link)
The letter had come. He'd received them,all of them, and read each one about twelve times over. Jack couldn't find the nerve to see him, though, to do what Sam had asked of him and meet him in the city. Of course he was all Jack could think about, all he wanted, reaLly-- but he couldn't do it. He couldn't let himsel fall into that again.

The butler looked at Sam oddly for a moment, still as cool as ever. "Come in, Sir," was all he said on the matter, stepping bck and swinging the door open wider for him. "Looking for John, I presume?" he asked with a distant friendly smile, pleased, in a way, that Jack finally had someone to see.

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[info]bombsaway
2009-06-23 06:41 pm UTC (link)
Sam had a long time to think about it, himself. Most of that thinking, however, was missing him, and feeling empty and alone when he wasn't able to even just talk to Jack. Sure, he was able to hide it perfectly well, as he had to from the rest of the world, and in a way it comforted him that the other man was at least out there, somewhere, who knew the true Sam Doubletree, but merely staring into space and remembering how it had been made things worse often.

He tried to move on, tried some things in France, in the seedier parts of Paris, but it didn't work. Nothing did. He just had to see him again, maybe it would give himself some closure.

Sam scratched the back of his long neck and kept on the polite smile, though a bit awkward, nodding and walking inside the place. He looked around in awe at the beautiful interior, how spacious and grand, almost forgetting that someone was talking to him. "Hmm?" he murmured, losing track of what he was here for in the midst of all the ogling. "Oh, no, Jack, actually, thank you," he said, not realizing his embarrassing mistake just yet.

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[info]my_boy_jack
2009-06-23 07:38 pm UTC (link)
Jack missed him too, more than anything. Hed never had anyone like Sam, no one to listen to him, no one he could be himself around. Living in this house, back in the 'real world,' he had never felt more alone, never needed him more. Then again, the severity of what he'd done hit him once more, stronger than at the beginning, even, and his longing for Sam was tinged with sick feelings of guilt.

The butler smiled, nodding. "John," he said, amused at the look of dazed surprise on the man's face. "Ill fetch him for you, Sir." With that, the older man turned and left, swiftly ascending the large whit staircase, disappearing around a corner. Down the hallway, he knocked lightly on a door, pausing before he opened it, waiting for word from the young man inside. "Sir, someone is at the door for you," he said as Jack looked up from his easel. "All right," he said, sighing, rubbing his hands on a spare handkerchief, dried paint still all over his face and hands and loose blue button-up shirt.

The butler waited at the door for the other man, waiting to close it behind him. He followed Jack down the stairs, practically faLling into him after the younger man stopped short, staring at the visitor in stunned, open-mouthed surprise. He excused himself, sidestepping Jack and finishing the stairs, walking away. It took Jack a few more moments to regain control, and he slowly began walking down again, stopping a good few feet before reaching Sam. "Wh-... What are you... I..." he stuttered, absolutely dumbfounded, speechless, absolutely unsure wat he was supposed to do or say, or even how he was supposed to feel.

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[info]bombsaway
2009-06-23 08:25 pm UTC (link)
Surrounded by camp followers and prostitutes and European women wanting to dance with him, that being the "real world" for him, Sam never felt more alone. Sometimes he felt like he didn't want to hide it, like he resented the rest of society for forcing him to pretend, but then he just figured he was thinking too much of it. He simply wouldn't think of it - the big picture, that is. However, he couldn't keep himself from thinking of Jack and everything that had happened.

Sam blinked, still terribly confused, and merely nodded, letting the other man go get him. He stood at the corner of the entrance room, looking at everything around him in curiosity and amazement, the trappings of wealth and privilege. It at least distracted him from the awkwardness of trying to remember what to say, what to do, how to act - that is, until Jack reached the stairs.

Sam merely looked up at him, seeing him covered in smears of paint, how he often remembered the other man from their years back in the war; that one time as Jack sat on the plane wing, painting the women, the first time they'd actually flirted, if you could call it that. He smiled faintly and shoved his hands in his pockets, also speechless, realizing he had no idea of what to do. As the other man stuttered, Sam let out a shy sort of chuckle and replied, "I dunno, just checking up to see if air mail is still as shitty as it used to be? Or I just happened to find myself in Ithaca," he said, snarky as ever, not yet admitting anything of importance, such as wanting to see him again.

Jack probably wanted him to leave, after all.

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)


[info]my_boy_jack
2009-06-23 09:38 pm UTC (link)
Oh, Jack certainly resented society. He hated it here, hated who he was forced to be, the life he was forced to live. He was too weak to take a stand and seek a way out, too dependant on other people to sort things out on his own. Sam had changed that, for the brief time Jack had him. Sam made him feel like there was hope, that he could at least have a place—with him—where everything was perfect, where he didn’t need to be anyone or meet unreasonable expectations. Sam had loved him, for no reason other than he was… himself.

“What?” Jack asked stupidly, too surprised and shocked and overwhelmed to understand, or think of a good reply.

He never thought he’d see him again. Of course he hoped for it, wished desperately to go back, to have the chance to relive what they once had. It was a secret he kept all these years, something he didn’t dare tell anyone. Jack still loved him—at least he thought he did—and missed him every day, but he never thought he’d get another chance to see him. At the same time, though, he wasn’t sure if he even wanted that chance. Seeing Sam would be painful—as it already was, that unpleasant pulling in his stomach—and bring up all those memories, making his departure even harder. He wanted to forget it, in a way—the thought of doing something so terrible and so wrong, so immoral and… well, the same old thing. It hadn’t been as bad, but now he was home, right in the middle of that world, and he had to face what had happened.

Literally face it, it seemed, as Sam Doubletree was standing right there.

“You can… uh, I… how much time do you have?” Jack asked, almost meekly, now overcome by a desperate desire to keep him here. “You can stay for dinner, I mean, you…” he broke off, sighing shakily, all of this being a little much to handle. “Do you want to… follow me? Er, I… my mother and…meeting… meeting guests, and all,” he blabbered, stuttering still, absolutely and completely out of his element.

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[info]bombsaway
2009-06-23 10:39 pm UTC (link)
Sam knew full well, there was no way to take a stand and settle things out, as long as society thought of him as sick and perverse, degenerate. The most he could do, the rebellion against those telling him "his kind" was dead wrong, was be with someone like him, but Jack had been the only one he could do that with. Sure, there were the occasional prostitutes, if he was sneaky enough to find one, but it wasn't the same.

Having his joke fail completely, Sam merely smirked and shook his head, shrugging it all off. "Nothin', nothin'," he sighed, just taking the opportunity to look at Jack again, remembering why he was so interested in the younger man in the first place. And here Sam was, an old man, face showing the years of hardening and stress and constant danger.

Sam still loved him, and hadn't been able to move on at all. It was something that absolutely killed his pride, a weakness, and he hated himself for being such a pansy. But he never hated what they had - he just figured he would have been able to stop thinking about him constantly.

"No, that's fine. I wouldn't want to intrude, just barge in and sit down to dinner with no damn word ahead of time. You probably think it's bad enough I'm even here," Sam awkwardly laughed, though hoping that wasn't the case. "If you want, I mean. . .it's all whatever you want. Hell, I can leave and go back to the city if that's what you really want. I. . .I just had to see you again."

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(no subject) - [info]my_boy_jack, 2009-06-24 02:32 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]bombsaway, 2009-06-24 04:38 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]my_boy_jack, 2009-06-24 05:17 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]bombsaway, 2009-06-24 08:08 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]my_boy_jack, 2009-06-24 08:54 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]bombsaway, 2009-06-24 09:22 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]my_boy_jack, 2009-06-24 06:09 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]bombsaway, 2009-06-24 06:43 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]my_boy_jack, 2009-06-24 07:00 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]bombsaway, 2009-06-25 02:21 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]my_boy_jack, 2009-06-25 05:23 am UTC

[info]bombsaway
2009-06-25 05:45 am UTC (link)
Though Sam had been able to travel many other places, stationed at other bases, other cities and missions in his line of duty, the muddy old English air base had a heavenly quality to it now; something he remembered so fondly, the "good old days." He couldn't tell anyone why, but perhaps Jack would know.

Sam smirked, rolling his eyes in that trademark, "son'bitch" way of his, one he used to use so often when teasing Jack. "Fine, don't take the compliment. You never did back then, either," he laughed, nodding and remembering back to it fondly. That was obvious in the way his face turned bittersweetly happy.

The older man laughed out loud and nodded, turning a bit red himself. "That was usually for my benefit, though," Sam drawled. . .almost. . .flirtatious. Carefully so, however, as he had been in the weeks following the time at the USO dance.

Sam sighed and hugged him tighter, one hand drifting up to hold the back of his neck, as if acting on impulse and simply doing what he wanted to do. He didn't think of where he was, what year it was and how things had changed, and didn't want to remember that he couldn't have what they once did. He didn't want to remember that it was forever over, and merely distracted himself with hugging the other man. Sam let out a comfortable murmur as he felt Jack's face on his neck, instantly remembering the closeness they used to have, how it used to feel when Jack moaned into his skin. . .and then Sam just felt like a lonely, old man for remembering such things.

He nodded and wrapped his arms more tightly around Jack, if that was possible, carefully running his hand down the other man's side, as if testing the waters. "I never stopped thinking about you," he murmured back to him. "I couldn't. And. . ." Sam didn't know what to say, he was too overwhelmed, and merely held him close, holding himself back from doing what he really wanted.

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[info]my_boy_jack
2009-06-25 06:42 am UTC (link)
Jack didn’t do any of those things, but he didn’t need to travel or serve to know how special Chipping Ongar had been. Of course, there was a little more to it for Jack and Sam, but even without that—it had been a wonderful time.

Jack merely grinned sheepishly in reply, shrugging his shoulders. “I took compliments I was more deserving of,” he replied, vaguely flirtatious himself.

Jack let out a small laugh, looking down as he blushed faintly. “I remember it going both ways,” the younger man replied carefully, quickly losing himself in Sam, just like he once had.

Jack shivered in Sam’s arms when he felt the other man’s hand against his skin, flackbacks instantly hounding his brain. He remembered every kiss, every smile, every time they slept together. It was all that was ever on his mind, really, and here, holding him again? Feeling Sam touch him? It was almost painful, especially knowing that this would end even faster than it had before.

Jack didn’t know what to say either, so he did the only thing that came to mind. Jack leaned back in Sam’s arms—though he couldn’t go far, as Sam was holding him too tightly—and kissed him quickly, leaning up on his toes to get closer, like he always used to.

Jack wasn’t even wondering if Sam would push him back. He didn’t even think of where they were, the unlocked door. He just needed to kiss him again, he had to, before the chance was lost.

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[info]bombsaway
2009-06-25 10:05 am UTC (link)
Sam smiled softly, getting that womanish flutter in his stomach as he heard Jack say that, picking up on the flirting - or at least what he hoped was flirting. He nodded and laughed, trying not to eye him with a pointed, happy sort of expression, though he couldn't help it at all. "Only about certain things. You'd think for a spoiled son'bitch like you were, you'd take any ego-boost you could get," he drawled. "Or was that me?"

"Yeah?" Sam asked with a lazy, pleased murmur, trying to sound suave and charming - getting used to truly flirting again, even if this would most likely be the last time, and even if he wasn't allowed to flirt. . .at least not here, not now. "Yeah, now that you mention it, reciprocation was a big part of the deal. Always was, wasn't it?"

Sam sighed, thinking he felt the other man shudder, and instantly dropped his hand to his shoulder again. Even that triggered all the memories, though - it was just being close to Jack again that did it. He gave him a nearly pleading look as he felt him move away slightly, not wanting him to stop, though knowing it had to. . .and then Jack kissed him.

He moved back soon after, gazing at Jack carefully, arms still wrapped around him. Sam wanted very badly to kiss him again, and. . .well, he wanted to do more than that, after all these years, but he knew that was just a lonely old man's empty hope. He still remained pressed close, hugging Jack tightly, looking down at him for a moment. "I still have what you wrote me. In the hospital," Sam whispered. "I still feel that way, too. I just had to tell you. I never stopped, not in all these years."

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[info]my_boy_jack
2009-06-25 05:50 pm UTC (link)
Jack laughed a little louder, still blushing, happy and shy and amazed to have him there again. “That was you,” he smiled gently, actually fond of the memory of something that used to annoy him so often. He missed Sam, after all—cockiness included.

“Think so,” the other man replied sheepishly, feeling a little awkward as they danced around the truth. Still, though, Jack loved having him here, looking at him again. It didn’t matter what they talked about—nerve-wracking and subtle insinuations, even—he just wanted him here.

Jack caught the look Sam gave him when he pulled back, surprised as hell. He couldn’t ever remember seeing that expression of his before, and it made him… sad. Sure, he ignored it and kissed him, deeply, but that look still worried him. He wasn’t sure what it could possibly mean.

When Sam pulled back, Jack stepped in again, hugging him just as tightly once more, arms wound around his stomach. Jack laughed softly at what Sam told him, turning his head to smile at him brightly. “Why the hell do you still have that?” he asked, a very faint blush coloring his cheeks. Jack’s expression softened when Sam said he still felt the same way, and he leaned up to press a kiss to his cheek, lingering there, reaching up to slide his hand through Sam’s hair. “Me too,” he said, forehead now pressed to the side of Sam’s face, hand running down the back of his head, to his neck. “I love you,” Jack said in a nearly inaudible whisper, too afraid to say it any louder.

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[info]bombsaway
2009-06-26 02:35 am UTC (link)
"Yeah, well," Sam smirked and chuckled, grinning back at Jack with happy nostalgia just plastered onto his face. "I needed all the compliments I could get," he laughed out loud, remembering just how cocky he had been. Having the favour of Jack back then sort of helped that along - he enjoyed being wanted and appreciated, relished in the power of being able to win him over, loved what they had. Sam kept remembering the good times with him, and hadn't stopped yet.

"Only fair, right?" Sam asked, noticing Jack's awkwardness. "I seem to remember you being the one to initiate more often than not, which was damned surprising to me. At least that's how I remember it. Was more memorable thatta' way." He'd tiptoe around everything as long as he could if it meant more time to spend even simply looking at Jack.

It was a look of wanting to do more, knowing he couldn't. It was Sam's expression of loneliness and wishing things could go back to the way they used to be. It probably wasn't anything Jack was used to seeing from him; after all, their days back in the war had the opposite effect of loneliness.

Sam hugged the other man as well, clinging to him desperately, holding on to whatever time they had together. He looked down at Jack, a sincere, open smile on his face as he said, "Why wouldn't I still have it? That was the first time anyone I loved ever said it back to me. Or, well. . .wrote it, I guess." He tilted his head closer to Jack as he kissed him on the cheek, letting out a pleased, deep sigh as he touched his hair, remembering every other time he would do that. Still absolutely overcome with emotion, especially as he heard those three words from Jack again, Sam tilted his head downward to meet his lips with another kiss, deep and slow and sincere.

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[info]my_boy_jack
2009-06-26 02:52 am UTC (link)
“Of course you did,” Jack replied with another laugh. “Your ego wasn’t nearly big enough.” Sam had been able to do all of those things, definitely. Jack was so easily swayed by the other man, even when he was at his angriest. He’d been in the palm of Sam’s hand, really—and even when he noticed, he didn’t mind at all. They had been in love, after all.

“Oh please,” Jack snorted softly, blushing more and shaking his head. “Remember it however you want, Sam, but you initiated plenty of things yourself,” he smiled, still looking quite shy and meek.

Jack smiled, still a little surprised by the fact that Sam had been in love with him even before that day—something that hadn’t sunk in, even after… well nearly six years. “Well still,” he smiled, “I was there to tell it to you. You’re a sentimental son of a bitch,” Jack laughed quietly, arms going even tighter around him, showing Sam just how much he actually appreciated it. All this time—well, most of the time—he’d worried that the other man had forgotten about him, or didn’t care at all.

Really, though, Sam was probably the one that should feel that way, if either of them. Jack never wrote him back—not lately, at least—and essentially ignored what little contact he tried to initiate. When all was said and done, though, Jack couldn’t help loving him. Sam would always be important to him, always.

Jack returned Sam’s kiss without much thought at all, natural as it had ever been. He reached up to hold Sam’s cheek softly, leaning up into him, automatically returning it before his mind got the better of him.

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(no subject) - [info]bombsaway, 2009-06-27 12:50 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]my_boy_jack, 2009-06-27 05:49 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]bombsaway, 2009-06-27 11:14 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]my_boy_jack, 2009-06-28 12:11 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]bombsaway, 2009-06-28 12:49 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]my_boy_jack, 2009-06-28 01:07 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]bombsaway, 2009-06-28 01:26 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]my_boy_jack, 2009-06-28 01:57 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]bombsaway, 2009-06-28 03:13 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]my_boy_jack, 2009-06-28 05:39 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]bombsaway, 2009-06-28 07:20 pm UTC
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[info]bombsaway
2009-06-30 06:32 pm UTC (link)
Sam blushed and smiled, shaking his head and asking, "Why'd you paint me? And will you let me see some?" He grinned and leaned down as Jack's face was angled just toward his, kissing him again. "You deserve more. Nothing's enough for you."

He shook his head and didn't want to place blame on Jack, didn't want to bring up sad things this time. He only wanted to focus on the happy times, that for Sam outweighed anything else. "It's fine, don't worry about it," he murmured softly. He took the opportunity to just look at his face, hoping the quiet would convey more than his own rambling could.

"Well surely you can find friends that fill both categories," Sam said, in a way relating to that. His time in the Air Force caused him to have to resort to the same, talk with people of his rank, not get too familiar, always be in command and professional - though he dealt with it okay, and was able to maintain friends as a result. "You'll figure it out, you have lots of time."

Sam nodded and picked up on his blatant reaction, saying, "Then we can leave together sooner. Before dinner or anything. Get to the city sooner, maybe get something to eat there. We don't have to wait for tonight to go back, we can go now. If you want." He smiled softly as Jack held onto his arms like that, remembering how it used to be, and replied, "We'll go now, then, if you like."

Sam didn't think of anything, letting his guard down, as he kissed Jack - solely focusing on him. He almost folded himself closer to Jack, tilting his neck to move in closer, one hand sliding along the back of his neck. Grinning as he mumbled, he murmured back, kissing him a little harder as he got distracted.

Giving the man an unamused look, he shook his head and grumbled embarrassedly, "No, not that careless, but still. I don't know. I could let something slip, without knowing, and I don't want to do that to you and your family. You mean too much to me. I already know what we used t-. . .what we have is difficult for you, sometimes, and I don't want to make it even more so. Around them, or anyone else." He desperately hoped that made sense.

He simply shook his head, "I'm sure. I want you ton-. . .I want you to come with me."

(Reply to this)(Thread)


[info]my_boy_jack
2009-06-30 07:13 pm UTC (link)
“Well, I mean… why wouldn’t I?” Jack asked, shrugging. “You’re important to me. It was all I could do, sometimes, to keep it all—missing you, wanting that—well… under control. I needed to do something,” he said, feeling like a lunatic. Jack blinked at him, surprised. “What, now? If you want, I… okay.” Jack smiled and returned Sam’s quick kiss, feeling so comfortable and loved and all that sappy junk. “What the hell’re you talking about?” he laughed, “All I want is a handkerchief. That’s all I need, really.”

Jack opened his mouth to speak again, but shut it promptly, quickly realizing that Sam didn’t want to talk about it. Instead, as a sort of apology, Jack leaned in and kissed him very, very quickly, pulling back as he ran his hand down Sam’s cheek.

“And usually they’re bastards,” Jack returned with a small smile. “I’d just rather be alone; that’s better than the alternative here.” He shrugged, shaking his head. “This is easier. I don’t mind,” he said, even though it was quite apparent he did, the sort of life he was forced to lead. Jack was practically a hermit, and he wasn’t even twenty-nine yet.

Jack sighed, tilting his head back a little, blue eyes focusing on something off behind Sam’s shoulder. “I don’t know if I can,” he said sadly, sighing again. “At least skip dinner, I… well, I have to run it by my mother. I can’t… well, she holds all the power,” he smiled miserably. “And, um… well, she’ll insist on meeting you.”

He had a feeling that wouldn’t go over well with Sam.

Jack let out another whimper-y sort of sigh against Sam’s lips, just missing this so much, not wanting him to leave. He shivered, lamely, as Sam held him, just trying to return the kiss as best he could, without letting his emotions take over again.

“Like what?” Jack pressed, wanting to know. “We’ve always had to cover it up; this isn’t something new. We’ve always had to be careful, always had to keep our mouths shut, watch what we say. “I think you’ll be fine, I do, I…all I care about is having you with me.”

Jack nodded once in reply, shortly, essentially saying that was the end of the conversation. “Let’s get a move on, then,” he said, pulling out of Sam’s arms, heading over to the wide double-doors that lead out to the hallway.

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)


[info]bombsaway
2009-06-30 08:06 pm UTC (link)
Sam shrugged and scratched at the back of his neck, blushing a bit and replying, "I dunno, I just never imagined myself being painted. It's. . .it's not a bad thing! Don't get me wrong! It's just curious," he smiled, obviously flattered. "Yeah, yeah, I'd like to," he nodded, "that is, if you're okay with it." Sam blushed as Jack laughed at him, "Well I dunno! Shuddup', nothin'," he grumbled guyishly, wanting to distract Jack from his sappiness and girlishness with another kiss.

Sam's eyes went wide with surprise as Jack kissed him, asking instantly, "What was that for?" as the other man moved back. He smiled nonetheless, sliding his hand over Jack's on his cheek.

The older man smiled sadly, hating the thought of Jack alone and not around people his own age, or anyone else other than his family for that matter. He wished he could be there for him, wished Jack could be as sociable as he had been back in the war, but knew he wanted it this way, and that there was nothing Sam himself could do. He didn't say a word, however, and merely smiled at Jack.

"What do you mean, Davis?" Sam asked curiously, confused. "Have to. . .you're joking, right?" he laughed, not at all realizing that he was serious. A grown man having to ask his mother for permission to leave? Why. . .that just didn't happen! He went a bit pale as Jack told him that last bit of information, stepping back and shaking his head, "I. . .oy, no, I. . .I'm in my damn uniform even, and. . ."

Sam's reaction probably wouldn't go over well with Jack.

Sam, on the other hand, let his emotions take over completely. He held him tighter, moving his kiss down to Jack's neck and jaw, unable to help himself. He was growing more desperate, more needy, more just having to kiss Jack or else he felt he might lose him forever.

"Well I know that, but your mother finding out is worse than anyone else in the world finding out. Apart from my commanding generals," he laughed, shaking his head. "It's hard for me to watch what I say when my mind is only focused on how much I've missed you," he admitted, hoping Jack wouldn't think of him as a complete weakling.

Sam nodded, almost passively, and shoved his hands in his pockets as he carefully followed the younger man.

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[info]my_boy_jack
2009-06-30 08:45 pm UTC (link)
“Uh, let me find them,” Jack said bashfully, pulling away, facing the room. Along the bottom of every wall, canvases of all sized leaned in rows and stacks. Art was really the only thing Jack cared for, and with all the time he had alone, there was a lot of it. He headed over to one far wall, starting to sift through one pile of canvases before moving to the next, about halfway though before he pulled out a medium-sized rectangle, shyly turning to Sam. “There’s this,” he said, placing it on top of a sheet-covered piano, revealing a basic portrait of the other man. Turning, passing it off, Jack continued to look through what he’d done, trying to find more of Sam.

“To apologize again,” he smiled meekly, knowing he’d been caught. “And because I wanted to,” he smiled, leaning up to kiss him again.

It was much easier for Jack to shut himself off here, become merely a puppet of his parents’. It was hard to get out, hard to do things on his own—his mother, for one, didn’t like that at all. She was one for practicality and appearances, anything else was unimportant. Jack wasn’t allowed much wiggle room—or any at all, really—to be himself or have fun. That came when he was alone.

“I wish I was,” he smiled, laughing sadly. “She’s… well, no. I’m serious.” It was pathetic, he knew that, but there was nothing Jack could do. Jack cringed at Sam’s reaction, expecting that. He took a step closer as the other man moved away, holding onto his arm gently. “I know, I know, but there’s… trust me, I wish you didn’t have to, but… well, maybe if you get out before she realizes anyone is here, but then the… I don’t know, I… it wont be that bad! Its fine if you’re in your uniform! Just stay… quiet and let her look you over and answer a few of her boring questions about serving, maybe even about me. And… no jokes, and that… well, it’ll be fine. I’ll be with you, after all.”

Jack gasped, groaning when Sam moved to his neck like that, head tilted back completely, eyes closed in pleasure. He couldn’t possibly stop Sam, nor did he want to. Not at all.

“She won’t find out, Sam,” Jack laughed softly. “That… that would be the last thing to ever occur to her. You won’t let anything slip, you—“ Jack sighed, letting him win, realizing that it probably would be more difficult this time around. “Okay. You don’t need to come to dinner. But if I cant leave, I… you’ll wait, right? Somewhere in town?”

Jack pulled the door open and headed down a long hallway, turning into another, all with dark cherry wood floors and doors and tall, engraved ceilings. Finally, he stopped at another door, pushing that open.

It was his bedroom. Hopefully Sam wouldn’t feel as awkward about this as he did, but… well, he had to get clothes and things, after all! He couldn’t very well leave Sam alone!

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[info]bombsaway
2009-07-01 03:26 am UTC (link)
Sam let him find the works, hands in his pockets as he always did when he was faced with an unfamiliar situation - seeing the man he loved for the first time in years applied to that, really. He narrowed his eyes as he eyed all the paintings, gazing at the colors and shapes, until he saw a familiar one. His smile curled up into a wide grin and he blushed, holding the painting as Jack walked away. "I'm not that handsome, you exaggerated," Sam joked, grateful, flattered eyes watching Jack try to find more.

He didn't argue or question that answer, and leaned into the kiss eagerly, of course. Sam deepened the kiss slightly, tugging at his lower lip just barely, his teeth merely brushing against Jack's lip.

"Jesus," Sam blinked as Jack explained. Hiding his insecurity, and seeing that the other man noticed his unsure nature, he laughed it off and shook his head, "And to think I always feared questioning from the military shrinks."

Not even thinking of stopping, Sam kissed him harder, tugging at the collar of his shirt to move down farther. "Wait, not allowed to leave a mark still, am I?" he snickered, remembering back to a period of time in their relationship.

"No, no, I'll go to dinner if you want, I promise," Sam insisted, though he'd really have to have a few drinks. . .or not, maybe that wasn't the best of all ideas. "Yeah, yeah. I'll wait for you. Just lemme' know what you want me to do."

Sam looked around at the interior of the house, now knowing how oil tycoon families back in Houston must have felt. He almost walked right on into Jack's bedroom, before he realized what it was, staying stuck at the doorframe and letting the other man get his things. He didn't know the etiquette of walking into another man's bedroom in his own house, and just decided to wait in the hallway, looking around at the ceilings, in particularly.

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[info]my_boy_jack
2009-07-01 03:46 am UTC (link)
“I just painted what I remembered,” Jack said shyly, pulling out another. This was of the other man’s back, torn and bloody, what he’d remembered from when Sam was in the hospital. Sam, in the picture, had his head tilted down, dark hair falling into his face, eyes focused on a hand that held his, the patch of an Airman on its sleeve. It was silly and sappy, maybe, but Jack needed things like that to help him get by. “That,” he said, putting it on the piano as well, going back to look for more.

Jack leaned up into him as well, running his tongue along Sam’s lower lip in return, wanting it to be deeper, hoping he’d simply go for it.

“Sorry,” Jack cringed again. “It… quick and painless, hopefully. If you’re able to survive five gunshots to the gut, you can… probably take her. Likely, at least.”

That was comforting, Jack.

Jack let out another pleased, breathless moan of approval and encouragement, his head still tilted back completely, giving Sam all the room possible. Jack laughed, low, happy, when Sam asked that, looking at him for a quick second. “She wouldn’t know what it was,” he said, pushing away the opened collar of his old button-down shirt for him, giving him the go ahead. This was thrilling, to be honest—it would only be the second or third time Sam had ever done this to him, after all.

“Well I don’t want to torture you,” he smiled sadly. “I’m just selfish, and I want you. I want you at dinner, I mean, or at least… with me. Wait in town, hell, down the street. I just… I want you to stay with me. I want all the time I can have.”

“You can… um, you can come in,” Jack said awkwardly, suddenly feeling very vulnerable, almost like he was standing there naked, or something. “If you want, I mean. I just need to get some things.”

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(no subject) - [info]bombsaway, 2009-07-01 05:28 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]my_boy_jack, 2009-07-01 05:42 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]bombsaway, 2009-07-01 06:14 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]my_boy_jack, 2009-07-02 02:14 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]bombsaway, 2009-07-02 02:17 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]my_boy_jack, 2009-07-02 02:21 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]bombsaway, 2009-07-02 04:14 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]my_boy_jack, 2009-07-02 04:55 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]bombsaway, 2009-07-02 05:30 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]my_boy_jack, 2009-07-02 06:48 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]bombsaway, 2009-07-02 07:31 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]my_boy_jack, 2009-07-02 10:46 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]bombsaway, 2009-07-03 01:39 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]my_boy_jack, 2009-07-03 04:31 am UTC

[info]bombsaway
2009-07-03 05:30 am UTC (link)
Sam laughed out loud every time he heard Jack's breath hitch in his throat like that, though not a laugh of ridicule - more just absolutely thrilled that he still had an effect on the other man. "Bullshit. Or it was just natural talent," he drawled, still trying to get to Jack as best as he could. Jack was, as sappy (or hell, as dirty) as it was, the best Sam ever had. Maybe it was the deeper feelings for him, but it was more of a compulsive need rather than a passing desire with him.

"I like the attention," he simpered, gazing happily at the other man. "No! I wanna' know! I guess I should be flattered that you looked at my dogtags, but I'd much rather you examine something else so closely," he drawled. "Ah, how I miss that stupid fucking cot. You were a good mattress," he joked.

Sam shuddered and groaned quietly, happy as ever, whining as Jack moved away. "For what? Hey, Davis, that's just the gospel truth, not an ego-trip," he smirked, giving him a challenging, seductive sort of look, trying to get him to keep going.

Sam nodded after he said it, knowing there was nothing to say, no reason to keep talking about it. It was a ridiculous fantasy, something that could never be, and thus they couldn't waste time talking about it. It was too painful when reality set in and Sam missed him terribly once he was gone.

The older man stopped laughing as Jack called the butler (or whatever his title was, Sam clearly had no idea at all), putting his hands in his pockets and standing rather pigeon-toed. Obviously not knowing how to act around him, the loudmouth captain merely stared at the hallway surrounding them, until Jack spoke again. He whined, "You mean dinner's a for-sure?"

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[info]my_boy_jack
2009-07-03 06:07 am UTC (link)
“Something in the water,” Jack mumbled with a very shy smile, putting the second painting away. He left Sam to walk across the room, putting the final one back in the spot he’d taken it from. Sam was… well, he was the only one Jack had ever had… in this sense, at least. Still, it was enough to make him remember, to make Jack want him, to miss him, to… well, to not want anyone else.

“I just told you!” Jack shot back, obviously embarrassed. He blushed even more at Sam’s dirty comment, shoving his chest boyishly. “I couldn’t, you were too sensitive,” he snarked in reply, flushed brightly still, at what he himself said. “I would have, but you never let me. Well, there was that one time…” he’d stop there. He was pretty sure Sam could remember.

“You’ve never read a gospel in your life, Texas,” Jack said with a laugh, pausing in surprise at the name he used. It… well, he hadn’t called him that in a long time, obviously, and it just… slipped out so easily. It struck Jack as odd, for some reason, but he just continued. “Besides, everything with you is an ego trip.”

He wouldn’t look at him. He knew what Sam would be doing, after all, and he was determined not to let it work.

That was just it, it wasn’t reality. They could talk and plan all they wanted, but in the end? This was just how things had to be. Fantasies and dreams and hopes meant nothing, and would only make reality harder to live through. All those thoughts of being happy with him, of finding a way to secretly carry this all on… it only hurt Jack more. He had done a good job of accepting it, and that had been hard enough.

Jack looked at the other man, blinking innocently. “But I… I thought you… the forks and all, we… no, I mean, if you don’t want to, if it would be too hard, I… its fine. I can come up with something to tell her, you just… would have to leave now.”

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[info]bombsaway
2009-07-03 06:54 am UTC (link)
"What will the mothers and fathers of Ithaca do?" Sam snarked, the smile on his face far from shy. He leaned back against the lonely piano comfortably, lifting the sheet a bit to hit one of the low keys. Sam had tried, at least in a physical sense, with. . .er. . .other men. Maybe one or two. The second was when he was really very drunk, and for all he knew, it could have been a woman. France, after all. But still, he stopped them soon, he didn't want anyone other than Jack.

Sam went so far as to begin to correct him, only a "Well. . ." being heard from him as Jack seemed to pick up on the same thought. All he did was scratch at the bridge of his nose and snicker, remembering that instance. . .or three, more specifically. . .quite well indeed.

"What? That's ridiculous, you don't read a gospel. You sing them, like, the music," Sam said, clearly only familiar with the lower-class and black churches around Houston where he grew up. Different worlds, really. Sam would feel terribly foolish when he learned the truth. And there were lots of truths to be learned. He smiled as Jack called him Texas again, missing the nickname, but only when he heard it in Jack's voice. "Yeah, well, I'm so amazing it's hard not to."

Sam nodded, keeping his hope that Jack would at least try to get out of dinner silent. He'd humour the younger man, he knew he wanted him to. "No, no, it's fine. I'm just kidding," he said, instantly affecting a wide smile. "Forks and spoons and no caviar."

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[info]my_boy_jack
2009-07-03 07:22 am UTC (link)
“Sleep soundly in their beds,” Jack returned with a silly smile, “and not worry about their daughters.”

… Hrm. Maybe he shouldn’t have said that. That was just begging for… well. Never mind. Their daughters certainly were safe.

Jack never had. Never. He couldn’t even think about it, really, not without feeling sick. It was hard enough accepting all of this with Sam, but to try and imagine it with someone else? That just made it worse, one-hundred fold.

“Exactly,” Jack replied with a self-satisfied smile, knowing he was right. Of course, he couldn’t help but smile stupidly at the memory, what they’d… done, what Jack had… got him to do. It… well, yes. Jack hadn’t forgotten that.

At that, Jack laughed out loud, adoring and admiring, kissing him quickly. “You’re right, of course,” he smiled, loving him too much to inform him of the truth. “Never mind,” Jack smiled shaking his head. “Of course,” Jack smiled in return, sporting a silly, coddling voice just to tease him.

“No, no, it’s fine,” Jack insisted, reaching up to lay his hand on Sam’s chest, only to catch himself quickly. He took a step away easily, making it look as natural as possible. “I’m only being selfish, I can meet you after. It’ll be boring and long and uncomfortable, you’re right, so I… just go. I can meet you at the train station,” Jack nodded, “and get Victor to give you a drive there. Its fine, go on.”

Sure, he wanted to be with him, but he could see how awkward this would be for Sam. He could set aside his own wants for an hour or two.

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)


[info]bombsaway
2009-07-03 07:56 am UTC (link)
Sam laughed out loud, "Well, that's one way to look at it." He couldn't keep himself from giggling, vulgar mind hard at work, weak will attempting to stop him from saying something too improper.

He had to bite the inside of his cheek to hold his tongue, but hey, it worked.

Sam. . .well. There were a lot of issues still floating around with him, and he had tried. But it did make him sick, and the paranoia of worry and fear that he would be caught by someone kept him from enjoying any physical contact he craved.

He merely raised his eyebrows and rolled his eyes as Jack looked so smug, but obliged him and let him have his moment of pride and success. Sam hadn't forgotten it either. Not by a longshot.

"Wh-. . ." Sam looked completely befuddled at how Jack laughed and used that tone with him, not knowing why he was teasing him. All he did was stand there and kiss him back quickly, blinking as if demanding some sort of explanation. He wasn't as intelligent as Jack, he'd always known that!

Sam pouted and then nodded, feeling as if it was a better choice. He did feel a little selfish himself, but he just didn't want to deal with the awkwardness and unfamiliarity of the situation. "Okay, I'll just be at the coffee shop at the station. The last train leaves at 7:45 tonight, but I understand if you change your mind."

He just wished he wouldn't. Sam didn't know what he'd do if Jack didn't come.

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[info]my_boy_jack
2009-07-03 08:37 am UTC (link)
“Sam, you—…” Jack stuttered, rolling his eyes at the other man’s reaction, feeling that familiar sick sense of guilt and shame was over him. He knew Sam thought it was funny, but he… well. It didn’t matter what Jack thought. “Well, either way, I guess,” he said with a sad smile instead, walking away and back over to the easel where he’d been working before Sam came.

“Just… never mind,” Jack smiled, patting the other man’s chest. “It doesn’t matter,” he laughed, finding the other man… well… adorable. But he’d never say that. Or even fully allow himself to think it, really.

Jack sighed, obviously a little disappointed, but it was nothing he couldn’t handle. Besides, he… didn’t really want his mother meeting Sam. Or Sam meeting his mother. It was awkward, and Jack probably would have been miserable, but he didn’t want to be without him, even for a short period of time.

“No, I’ll be there,” Jack assured him, nodding, offering the other man a smile. “I promise, I’ll be there.” He nodded, stepping away again, inviting Sam to follow him to the stairs. “Victor?” Jack called out again, starting to descend the staircase, stopping and turning halfway when the butler answered from behind. “Can you drive Captain Doubletree to the station, please? Make sure his ticket is taken care of, if you will?”

With a nod, the other man left, pausing to stare dully at Sam, waiting for him. “I’ll see you later?” Jack asked, a very faint tinge of worry and loneliness in his voice.

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(no subject) - [info]bombsaway, 2009-07-04 04:52 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]my_boy_jack, 2009-07-04 05:35 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]bombsaway, 2009-07-04 10:11 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]my_boy_jack, 2009-07-04 06:59 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]bombsaway, 2009-07-06 04:28 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]my_boy_jack, 2009-07-06 04:48 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]bombsaway, 2009-07-06 05:16 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]my_boy_jack, 2009-07-06 05:37 am UTC



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