wallie (wallie) wrote in 1978,
@ 2012-09-08 13:43:00

Walden didn't like the Lestrange Estate. The furniture was all too small and flimsy for him, and Bellatrix was a nosy bitch who didn't know how to mind her own business. He just wanted to go home and be alone in his dirty, sturdy castle without all the house-elves to bother him.

Only then he'd probably get lots of visits from Rabastan or something. Maybe. Walden was refraining from mentioning Remus Lupin, but Remus Lupin still existed and it had been two days since Rodolphus had talked to the stupid Aurors about Rabastan coming home and it had been in the papers and Lupin, the fag, had sent letters and a Christmas present and Walden was sure at least one of those letters was asking to visit.

He wasn't a fag. He wasn't jealous. That would be stupid. Walden walked into Rabastan's bedroom, where he'd set up camp for the time being, and sat next to Rabastan's bed. He was lying there while he recovered from being in a cage with very little to eat for a few weeks. "Did you get more letters today?"

(Post a new comment)

lebruised
2012-09-08 06:05 pm UTC (link)

Rabastan had been getting a lot of letters from Remus. And he had missed Remus quite a bit, even with Walden around. Remus was... different. He was... able to express his emotions. And was sweet and kind. Walden was only sweet and kind when forced into it.

He looked up from eating a chocolate from the box Remus had sent him, then nodded. "Yes. I have friends." He explained. "They were all worried."

(Reply to this)(Thread)

	wallie 2012-09-08 06:15 pm UTC (link)
	Walden pursed his lips. Sure. They were all worried. Especially Remus Lupin, Rabastan's boyfriend. "Must be nice," he said, shooting the box of chocolates a dirty look. Chocolates meant the half-breed. He looked up at Rabastan. "Your brother was worried. He hasn't given you any presents." (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

	lebruised 2012-09-08 06:35 pm UTC (link)
	Rabastan frowned at that for a moment. "Yes. He has. He brought me flowers and he's having a dinner tonight. People are going to come here and we're going to eat. I've already saved you a spot at the dinner table beside me." He reached up and ran a hand through his hair. "Why are you being so... This." (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

	wallie 2012-09-08 06:40 pm UTC (link)
	"I'm not being this," Walden grumbled, frowning at Rabastan. He felt defensive. This sort of thing had never happened to him before and he was still... confused about his father being dead. It was all understandable. "Is Lupin coming to the dinner tonight?" he asked. "Did you save him a spot on your other side?" (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

	lebruised 2012-09-08 06:55 pm UTC (link)
	Rabastan groaned when Walden brought up Remus. He sighed softly and sank back against his pillows, shaking his head. "Remus will be there. And he'll be on the opposite side of the table." He shook his head. "You've told me numerous times that you don't want to date me." (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

wallie
2012-09-08 07:03 pm UTC (link)

Walden had said other things too. Rabastan knew him better than anyone. He'd seen things Walden hated to even think about. This made him want to tear the room apart, or kidnap Rabastan again because keeping him in a cage seemed liked a good idea now.

"Fine," Walden growled, getting to his feet. "You can be a faggot with your half-breed. Don't come crawling to me when he bites you."

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

	lebruised 2012-09-08 07:57 pm UTC (link)
	Rabastan looked back at Walden for a moment, tears welling up in his eyes. He pushed himself up from his bed and looked sadly at the other boy before he wobbled and fell onto his knees. "Don't leave." Rabastan crawled towards him, resting at Walden's leg. "Please." (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

	wallie 2012-09-08 08:02 pm UTC (link)
	"Stay in bed," Walden snapped, grabbing Rabastan and carrying him back. He sighed as he tucked him in. "You're going to hurt yourself again, you idiot. I've spent long enough making sure you were okay. Don't go and fuck it up." He sat on the side of Rabastan's bed instead of in the chair he had been sitting on. "You make things very difficult for me, you know." (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

	lebruised 2012-09-08 08:06 pm UTC (link)
	"How do I make anything difficult for you?" Rabastan looked up at him sadly and shook his head. "I do my best to love you. To make you feel loved and wanted. What else could I possibly do for you? What do you want?" He felt himself start to cry. (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

	wallie 2012-09-08 08:15 pm UTC (link)
	Walden let out a frustrated growl, pushing Rabastan back against the bed and pinning him there, glaring down at him. "Stop it," he ordered. "Stop doubting me. What the fuck do I have to do for you? I killed three people. I saved your life. I told you things I don't tell anyone. What else do you want from me?" (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

	lebruised 2012-09-08 08:17 pm UTC (link)
	"I want you to be with me." Rabastan looked back at Walden as he began to cry a little harder, then closed his eyes and looked away. "I want you to want only me. And to be with me and just... live with me. You can finish school and I can quit and we can just be together." (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

wallie
2012-09-08 08:27 pm UTC (link)

Walden looked down at Rabastan for a long moment when he finished. Just... be together. Live with him. "Your house isn't built for me," Walden said. "And I don't want to live with Bellatrix. She smirks all the time and Rodolphus doesn't fuck her enough to keep her from trying to get on my cock."

He let go of Rabastan, sitting back. "My house," he said. "Not yours. You can send some of your elves to clean it up, if you want. Get rid of all the blood and dirt. I won't mind that."

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

lebruised
2012-09-08 08:31 pm UTC (link)

Rabastan smiled a small bit and leaned in to kiss Walden softly. He touched his cheek, sliding his hand into the other boys and nodding. "Yes." He whispered and then pulled Walden against his chest, pressing close to him.

"I can send them tonight. They'll have it clean by the morning and we can move in." Rabastan glanced at his bedside table and grabbed a quill and some paper, writing a letter to Remus to explain that he didn't want to see him anymore. That it wasn't fair to get him mixed up in his world. He held it out to Walden once it was in the envelope. "Send this to Remus. I'm breaking up with him."

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

wallie
2012-09-08 08:37 pm UTC (link)

"Good," Walden said, taking the letter from Rabastan and smirking down at it. Part of him wanted to deliver it in person and punch the wolf in the face for touching Rabastan. "He doesn't deserve you."

He touched Rabastan's hair and then pulled his hand away, standing up. "I'll owl the half-breed and then I'll come back. Your brother will want you to stay for the party."

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

	lebruised 2012-09-08 08:40 pm UTC (link)
	"Are you staying for the party?" Rabastan asked as he looked back at Walden sadly. "If you don't, the only people who will be here are Lucius, Evan and Narcissa. And I'd really like for you to be here with me. I don't like any of them." (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

	wallie 2012-09-08 08:46 pm UTC (link)
	"I'll stay," Walden agreed, after a moment. He didn't really like any of them either, but Rabastan would stop looking so sad if he agreed. What was wrong with him? He'd never cared about people looking sad before. "At long as there's real food." (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

	lebruised 2012-09-08 08:47 pm UTC (link)
	"I'll make sure that the elves bring you one of those steaks I've heard. They're supposed to be so big a person like me could rip a gut." Rabastan smiled at Walden and reached up, running his fingers through his hair. "I love you, Walden." (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

	wallie 2012-09-08 08:51 pm UTC (link)
	Walden looked at Rabastan for a moment and then nodded. "I know," he said. "I'm going to mail your letter and then I'll come back. Get the elves to start working." He got up and left the room. It still made him a bit uncomfortable, to think that everyone was going to know about him, but at least he had Rabastan to himself. (Reply to this)(Parent)

	lebruised 2012-09-08 09:58 pm UTC (link)
	Rabastan was still laying in bed and waiting for Walden to come back. He closed his eyes and imagined how much the house-elves had to be cleaning and how repulsed they probably were. He felt bad for them really. He heard a knock on his door and grumbled, imagining it must be Lucius. "Come in." (Reply to this)(Thread)

mycardigan
2012-09-08 10:49 pm UTC (link)

Remus had been dying to see Rabastan ever since he'd seen in the paper that he was back. Part of him, a selfish part, had thought that he shouldn't have had to read about it, but of course Rabastan wasn't in the state to send owls. He'd sent his boyfriend letters instead, and then best chocolate he could buy with the money he had.

He'd accepted the invitation to Rabastan's house for dinner eagerly and then... and then there was an owl informing him that Rabastan wanted them to break up.

Remus didn't understand it. He didn't like it. It hurt, and he was a Gryffidnor so he'd come to see Rabastan in person to have it out. If they were going to break up that was okay, but he refused to do it through a letter.

He walked into Rabastan's room when he called for him to enter, wincing and feeling his heart pang when he saw Rabastan in his bed. He'd lost weight and he looked grumpy. "Rabastan? I... got your owl. I want to talk."

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

	lebruised 2012-09-08 11:14 pm UTC (link)
	Rabastan wasn't expecting to see Remus. He stared at him for a moment, then brought his blankets up to cover himself and his thin frame. He closed his eyes for a moment, then let out a soft sigh. "What are you doing here, Remus?" Rabastan gave him a sad look. "I didn't want you here for a reason." (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

mycardigan
2012-09-08 11:18 pm UTC (link)

"I'm here to find out what that reason is," Remus told Rabastan. "Or just... I don't know." Remus gave him a pained look. "I just want to know what happened to make you change your mind."

He ran a hand through his hair, sitting in the chair beside Rabastan's bed. "I thought I was going to go crazy worrying about you. I couldn't concentrate on anything. I kept wanting to point out to Dumbledore that my senses are better than most people's and I might be able to help with something. And then it was in the papers that you were home and I was so relieved but then... this." He held up the letter. "I don't understand."

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

lebruised
2012-09-08 11:58 pm UTC (link)

This wasn't what Rabastan wanted to go through at that moment. He looked back at Remus for a moment, then decided to go with the truth. The whole truth. He wasn't going to hold anything back from him.

"When I was a young boy, around three or four years old, my father allowed Walden Macnair Sr to do horrible things to me." He explained. "They would both rape me together. When Walden hurt my brother, they made him go away. But, my father never stopped." He shrugged. "So, after making friends with Walden Jr, we decided to kill my parents."

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

mycardigan
2012-09-09 12:44 am UTC (link)

Remus opened his mouth to say something and then realized he was mind was blank. He had no response to that. Rabastan's parents were dead. He didn't know about walden Sr, but it would make sense. The Macnairs weren't rich. It probably wouldn't get headlines.

"Oh," he said. His mind caught up with what was going on and he frowned. "I -- I can't say I never fantasized about killing Greyback. I would, if I ever got half a chance, but you... what does this have to do with us breaking up?"

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

lebruised
2012-09-09 01:00 am UTC (link)

"My father was in a relationship with Walden's father at some point. When Walden's father found out what we did..." He paused and looked Remus over. He had to be careful with all that he said.

"He kidnapped me." Rabastan admitted and looked at Remus. "He locked me in a cage and didn't feed me. Didn't let me out unless he was fucking me." He shook his head. "Walden saved me. And now.. I feel like I owe my life to him."

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

	mycardigan 2012-09-09 01:08 am UTC (link)
	Remus gave Rabastan a sad look, not because of the break up, but because of what they other boy had gone through. "Bastan, that's horrible. Did you tell the Aurors?" He moved to sit on the edge of the bed, touching the other boy's hand. "Have you talked to anyone about what happened? Healers? Your brother? Walden doesn't... seem like the talking type." (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

	lebruised 2012-09-09 01:29 am UTC (link)
	"No. I haven't talked to anyone." Rabastan told Remus and shook his head. "In all honesty, I haven't talked to anyone other than Walden." He ran a hand through his hair. "Everyone has been crowding me. I just wanted to be alone." (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

mycardigan
2012-09-09 01:37 am UTC (link)

"Oh," Remus said. He pulled his hand back from Rabastan and sighed. "I just... I don't know," he said, closing his eyes for a moment and burying his hands in his hair. "I've been so worried and I love you and it's really hard to just... understand that you're actually breaking up with me. That you actually don't want to be with me anymore." He gave Rabastan a sad look. "Maybe I just don't want to believe it."

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

	lebruised 2012-09-09 01:57 am UTC (link)
	Rabastan looked back at Remus and sighed softly. "I love you too, Remus. I really do. Breaking up with you is.. It's really hard for me. Which is why I didn't want to face you. Because I still care about you a lot." (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

mycardigan
2012-09-09 02:01 am UTC (link)

Remus wasn't sure he believed that, considering how short the letter had been, but he leaned in and kissed Rabastan for a long moment. "I suppose this means I'm uninvited from your welcome home party."

He laughed, humourlessly, and touched Rabastan's face, running his fingers through the other boy's hair. Remus fought the urge to lick Rabastan's cheek as he pulled back. "I should go before your boyfriend gets back."

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

lebruised
2012-09-09 02:11 am UTC (link)

Rabastan stared at Remus for a moment, after the kiss had broken. He only barely heard his words. He slid his hand into Remus's hand for a moment and then felt himself start to cry again, shaking his head.

"Why couldn't we have just ran away together?" He asked, feeling himself break. "Like we'd planned. It had been such a good plan. I wanted to be a good boyfriend and love you and have you love me. And to read books. And to open the little bakery with the book shop. Why couldn't I just have that instead of what was forced on me?"

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

mycardigan
2012-09-09 02:23 am UTC (link)

Remus stared at Rabastan for a moment and then moved closer to him, grabbing his hands and holding them tightly. "You could," he said. "Still. Rabastan, you think I don't still feel everything? I do. I promise I do. I love you. I want all that."

He closed his eyes, trying to calm himself down. "I shouldn't be saying these things. You have feelings for someone else. Someone you went through a lot with. It's not fair of me."

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

	lebruised 2012-09-09 04:47 pm UTC (link)
	"Don't you have feelings for someone else as well?" Rabastan asked quietly as he looked back at Remus. He reached up with a shaking hand and ran his fingers through Remus's hair, then kissed his temple softly. "I've seen the way you still look at Remus. It used to make me crazy jealous." (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

mycardigan
2012-09-09 09:32 pm UTC (link)

"No," Remus said, sighing as he sat back, pulling away from Rabastan a little. "I don't. Sirius and I may have slept together once, but he's got a girlfriend now." And they were fighting because Sirius didn't approve of Remus dating a pure-blood. He'd gotten hurt, but not for the reasons Sirius thought.

"I'm sorry I made you jealous," Remus said, glancing up at Rabastan. "I didn't know."

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

	lebruised 2012-09-09 09:57 pm UTC (link)
	Rabastan slipped his hand into Remus's hand, then reached up and ran his other hand through the boy's hair. He kissed him softly, pressing a little close. "I'm sorry that I hurt you." He whispered. "I really do love you. But, I'm not good for you, Remus. My family is fucked. I'm a murderer. You deserve so much better than me." (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

	mycardigan 2012-09-09 10:06 pm UTC (link)
	Remus wished Rabastan would stop saying he loved him, or at least stop trying to make it seem like he was breaking up with Remus for his own good. "I'm a werewolf," he reminded Rabastan, touching his cheek. "Don't talk like that. I'm the one who has issues, not you. I'm probably going to be dead by the time I'm forty. At least Walden will be around for you." (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

	lebruised 2012-09-09 11:37 pm UTC (link)
	Rabastan frowned at that and shook his head. "No." He told him. "You're not allowed to die, Remus. You're my best friend. You're my only friend." He admitted and then ran a hand through his hair. "Fuck." (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

	mycardigan 2012-09-09 11:41 pm UTC (link)
	"It's not really up to me, Rabastan." Remus pulled away. "This was a bad idea. I don't even really know what I came here for. I should go." He looked at Rabastan for a moment, then leaned in and kissed him softly. "I'm really glad you're safe." (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

	lebruised 2012-09-10 12:27 am UTC (link)
	Rabastan looked back at Remus sadly. "We're not going to be friends anymore. Are we?" He asked, his voice full of sadness. He closed his eyes for a moment, then took a deep breath. "I'll miss you." (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

mycardigan
2012-09-10 12:39 am UTC (link)

"No, probably not," Remus said, glancing at Rabastan. If he tried to stay friends with Rabastan his other friends would definitely stay mad at him. "I'll miss you too." He brushed his hand against Rabastan's and then stood, pulling back. "I'm sorry it didn't work out. I'll... we'll see each other at Hogwarts." He got up and left the room. It felt like if he didn't they'd be there saying goodbye forever.

(Reply to this)(Parent)

scribbld is part of the horse.13 network
Design by Jimmy B.
Logo created by hitsuzen.
Scribbld System Status