Lieutenant Colonel Maes Hughes (maeshughes) wrote in fullmetalthread,
@ 2008-04-21 22:11:00

you are being summoned
Who: Myself, Edward (

edokunedokun989), and Roy Mustang (

roy_mustang)
When: The following evening.
Where: Central HQ
Rating: PG-13
Summary: Maes is bored and is about to harass people.

Maes yawned while he filed some papers. He was getting bored. Working late always got on his nerves and working later made him a bit of a loon. He looked at the pictures on his desk of his family and let out a sigh. His ears perked when he heard footsteps in the hallway. He grabbed one of the pictures on his desk and ran out of the room, chasing down whoever it might be about to smoother them with the beautiful picture of his daughter.

"EVERYONE COME SEE THE NEWEST PICTURE OF MY BELOVED ELYSIA!"

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roy_mustang
2008-04-23 02:48 am UTC (link)

Roy Mustang absolutely despised paperwork. Honestly, "despised" was too light a term. "Hate" wasn't much better, either. There was nothing in the world that could describe his utter dislike for the stupid scraps of paper that Hawkeye kept stacking on his desk (it was close to collapsing under all that weight, he was certain) and demanding that he fill them out. If she were in his position, there was no doubt that she'd let up a little on her strict "do-this-now-and-do-it-right" rule. Knowing that woman, though, Roy couldn't even be sure that... well...

Urgh. After half-heartedly scribbling his illegible signature on the what had to be billionth form that week, the colonel sighed and let his pen drop from his hand, clattering unceremoniously on the desk below. He dragged a palm down his face, mumbling something about how unjust it was that he was being forced to work so late into the evening. Sure, his entire unit was still working away (as a consequence of a certain young Elric's shenanigans earlier that afternoon), but that didn't make it any better. The man wanted to be at home, lounging on his couch and gulping down a bottle of wine. Mmmmm.

That, of course, wouldn't be happening that night, for Hawkeye had left not ten minutes ago after unloading another armful of paperwork upon his desk. He, of course, didn't quite believe that her threat of sending a bullet through his skull if he slacked off would be held, but that woman had many other less painful (but more humiliating) tricks up her sleeve that he really didn't want to have to deal with. Still, though, Roy wasn't sure how much more of this he could take. What if he just took a quick break and stretched his stiff legs a bit? She couldn't get mad at him for that, could she?

Without hesitation, Roy leapt from his chair and bolted out the door from his office, ignoring the shocked looks of his subordinates as he flashed by them and down the hall, making a beeline for---

---well, wherever it was he was headed would have to wait, for the next moment, the colonel found himself being suffocated by an overly-excited Maes Hughes and a shiny, new picture of his darling daughter, Elysia. Roy struggled against the proud father, growling, "MAES, I'VE SEEN HER MORE TIMES THAN EITHER YOU OR I CAN COUNT! I DON'T NEED TO HAVE A NEW PHOTO STUFFED IN MY FACE EVERYDAY BECAUSE I DON'T NEED A PLAY-BY-PLAY OF HER LIFE!!!" Sure, the girl was his "niece", but there was absolutely no reason for him to get so worked up over seeing her pretty little face like Maes did. However, no amount of struggling had ever fazed the man before, so what made Roy think that it would now?

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maeshughes
2008-04-23 03:39 am UTC (link)

He grinned and quickly reached into a pocket of his jacket and took out a small notebook and flipped it open.

"ELYSIA DID SO MUCH YESTERDAY YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN THERE!" Maes sang out and began to read from the list all of the things that his wonderful daughter did on the previous days.

"She learned how to play a song on the piano! Isn't she just a smart?! Yes, she is incredibly smart because she gets it from me, her Father! Although her Mother is very smart too, I believe she has my expert skills in being the best she can be! Elysia will grow up to be a very smart and beautiful woman! She's already smart and beautiful, but when she gets older, she will make every man in the entire world swoon with glee!" Maes chirped, clutching his hands together excitedly.

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edokun989
2008-04-23 05:34 pm UTC (link)

Ed stared up at the Headquarters of the military with dread. It wasn't his fault the damn cow had decided that the street he was fighting that crazy asshole in, was it? He'd avoided the place all day but Al had left him at the gate saying that he'd be locked out of their hotel room until he talked to the Colonel.

So he'd been staring at the building for ten minutes at the least and hadn't bothered to answer the people walking past who gave him a greeting. He was more worried about what the Bastard Colonel was going to do to him. Finally, he sighed and made his way into the building towards the Colonel's office.

However, the sight that met his eyes was more hilarious than Ed could handle. Roy Mustang was being quickly spoken to by an overly zealous Maes Hughes and he looked terrified of Maes.

"And when she gets there, Lieutenant, you'll be there to smack those guys, won't you?" Ed said with a small grin as he approached the two older men.

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roy_mustang
2008-04-24 01:23 am UTC (link)

It took all of Roy's willpower not to reach out and fry his best friend.

...however, a deep breath helped to calm his nerves and the colonel cleared his throat in an attempt to interrupt Maes before he managed to get into one of those long spiels. Too late; Maes continued right along. The man really was a bit too unhealthily obsessed with his daughter. Roy was certain that if he had his own child, there was absolutely no way that he would dote on it as much as Maes did. Sure, Elysia was Maes' pride and joy, but how could any child be able to take having her photo taken every second of every day as Elysia did? It was hard to imagine, but Roy's only guess was that she enjoyed the attention.

Whatever the case, the colonel himself wasn't fond of the few years of photo-flashing that he'd had to put up with, and because he'd had so much practice, he easily slipped into a "I'm-not-listening" mode, letting an expressionless mask slip onto his face and staring right through Maes. Without warning, however, the familiar voice of Edward Elric reached his ears, and Roy did his best to hold back the snort that threatened to escape in response to the young alchemist's words. Part of him wanted to congratulate the boy on his remark, while the other half was still immensely sour over the episode earlier in the day and wanted to rant at him.

The angry side won. Ignoring Maes, he stated, "Fullmetal, I expect you in my office as soon as Hughes has finished showing you his wonderful new pictures of Elysia. You are to report to me exactly what happened earlier this afternoon. Make it short with the lieutenant here... although that's not going to be too difficult for you, will it?" With that, he turned on his heel and made his way back to the safety of his office, sniggering madly to himself as he went.

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edokun989
2008-04-24 01:46 am UTC (link)

Ed nearly started to cry. He hadn't thought his remark would backfire this damn much. He liked the Lieutenant, but he wasn't any more a fan of Elysia and her pictures taken by her dear father any more than Roy was. So when the man began to walk away after demanding a report, Ed half a mind to transmute a wall betwixt his self and Maes Hughes.

"Oh, but he was showing you them first!" Ed made a desperate grab at something, "And he can always come listen too..." And protect me from your wrath.. But it was a bit late as the Colonel had already began to leave.

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maeshughes
2008-04-24 11:21 pm UTC (link)

Maes grabbed Edward and spun him around.

"NOW YOU WILL HEAR ALL ABOUT ELYSIA'S ACHIEVEMENTS!" He mused and dug into his pocket then pulled out a flipbook of pictures.

"Here she is riding her tricycle, oooooh and here she is dancing in a mudpuddle haha we had to give her a bath after that because she got so dirty! Ooooh and here's one of her painting the wall! ISN'T SHE JUST THE CUTEST THING EVER?! If only you were smaller, you would make the perfect playdate for her!"

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edokun989
2008-04-24 11:26 pm UTC (link)

Ed's eyebrows jumped up into his hairline as he was spun and then scowled when he was forced to look at the notebook. It wasn't until the last comment was said before Ed's face begun to turn a stunning shade of scarlet, "WHO ARE YOU CALLING SO SHORT THAT HE COULD EASILY PASS AS A THREE YEAR OLD?!" Ed yelled at the top of his lungs as he flailed his arms angrily.

After he'd gained the attention of everyone nearby, Ed let his arms comes down and glared at the Lieutenant, "You know, I really should go report to the bastard, otherwise he'll burn my ass, so if you'll excuse me?"

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maeshughes
2008-04-25 03:08 am UTC (link)

Maes had forgot about how Edward hated being called short or anything close to short for that matter.

"BUT YOU WOULD HAVE MADE SUCH A CUTE LITTLE PLAYDATE FOR MY BEAUTIFUL STUNNING DAUGHTER!"

He says anyways, simply captivated by how much he loves his daughter.

"Oh, you have important matters? Well then, we can continue this conversation at another time! I'll tell Elysia you said hi!"

Maes spots Armstrong and runs over to him then shoves the same picture he had been waving around in Armstrong's face.

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	edokun989 2008-04-25 03:15 am UTC (link)
	Ed, glad to be rid of the overbearing Lieutenant, he marched towards where he knew the Colonel's office to be. It only took a minute to get there and he quickly avoided the glares from the last few staff members who were in there and quickly moved into Mustang's office. "That was really mean." Ed growled out as he entered the room. (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

roy_mustang
2008-04-26 06:14 am UTC (link)

Occupied by flicking tiny paper wads from his desk, Roy jerked up straight and cleared his throat as Edward entered. He brushed the remaining wads onto the floor before flashing the kid one of his signature smirks that could instantly melt the heart of any woman. "Ah, but you made Lieutenant Hughes' day by looking at those pictures. You should at least be happy about that, Fullmetal. I did you both a favor."

Ignoring whatever Ed's reaction was, the colonel stood slowly from his chair and stepped out from behind his desk, walking over to the only window in the room and glancing out into the streets of Central. He stood there silently for a few moments before sighing, "Edward, the damage you did to the city earlier this afternoon put a bad mark on our military headquarters. Care to share with me what it was exactly that you did and why?"

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edokun989
2008-04-26 04:30 pm UTC (link)

Ed had to keep from screaming at the man about the first thing. It was not a favor to him no matter how the bastard decided to play it out, but the thought vanished when the Colonel addressed his earlier fiasco. "Well...about that," Ed sighed and shoved his hands in the pockets of his leather pants, "See, there were these guys chasing us from the desert and they'd followed us here. Al and I were just trying to get them out of the city when this cow showed up in the middle of the frickin' street..."

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roy_mustang
2008-05-03 03:26 am UTC (link)

"...a... what!? A cow!?" Roy whipped around to face the young alchemist, his usual mask completely gone, replaced instead by a hanging jaw and wide eyes. "How the hell does a cow just appear out of nowhere, Fullmetal!?" He'd heard of many unexplainable things before --- afterall, in a world constructed around alchemy, you had to expect the unexpected. But a cow was a rural animal. Central was not rural. The bovine had no reason to even be in the city...

Unnerved and realizing that he'd let his surprise show, the colonel snapped his jaw close, clearing his throat. You better have a decent explanation, Ed, he thought, leaning over and drumming his fingers on his overly-large, oak desk.

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	edokun989 2008-05-03 11:42 pm UTC (link)
	Ed sighed and started pacing the room, "Yeah, a cow. This guy was passing through the city with his cow, trying to sell the damn thing. I don't know why he thought he could sell it in Central, but country people are strange. And I mean, I should know..." He cleared his throat and stopped passing, turning to face Mustang, "I used to think cities were fairy tales." (Reply to this)(Parent)

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