And Gabriel looks at the incomplete story. His heart feels like a knife has been plunged into it, and the decision he is trying to make kills him on the inside. It is something he never believed he was ready for, and he still doesn't think he is.
"I remember," he said, "When she died. They said it was an accident."
He paused.
"I ran away, and I left Connor with Francesca to try and connect to a life I had before Alyssa. But it didn't work. The idea of meeting my real mother was great, because it was something I thought I could control. I didn't think there were other factors. I didn't think about the rest of my family."
And then he met Lyta, and then later Warren.
"Lyta and Warren reminded me how unable I am to control the things around me, and it reminded me so much of Alyssa's death. It was something I couldn't control."
He was overwhelmed. Face and eyes: red. Tears streaming. Body shaking. Voice trembling. Head lowered.
"It's my fault."
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