Cepheus Malfoy (pheus) wrote in paddedrooms,
@ 2013-01-09 05:57:00

Cepheus wasn't looking forward to this, but he knew that it was pretty much over between he and Xavier. They just had to... actually confirm it. He sighed to himself and looked himself over in the mirror of his car before he made himself get out of the car and go up to the flat that they were sharing. He put his key in and looked around, finding Xavier watching telly.

He put his keys on the counter and stepped into the flat, looking at Xavier, then fell into the chair beside the couch. What did he say now?

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	pheus 2013-01-09 09:11 am UTC (link)
	"You hung out with someone you shagged. After promising that you wouldn't." Cepheus pointed out and shook his head. "I felt like it was pretty much over then and there. You broke my trust." He shrugged. "I'm not saying that I'm innocent. I'm not." He looked at Xavier. "Can you honestly say that when you found Caspar and slept with him, you wanted to keep me?" (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

xav
2013-01-09 09:16 am UTC (link)

"Not until after you and James were together!" Xavier snapped. "I texted him, but I stayed away. I went and saw Albus, like you asked me to, and he was the one who showed me you and James and then I went and saw Caspar."

He got to his feet. "Yes, I did want to keep you, because I loved you, no matter what you thought of me. I was happy with you. But none of that matters because it's obvious to me that this is over now."

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pheus
2013-01-09 09:23 am UTC (link)

Cepheus looked up at Xavier and then closed his eyes for a moment. And then a rush of emotions were coming over him. He didn't know where they'd come from, but he was suddenly on his feet and walking over to Xavier.

He shook his head and looked up at him. "I love you." He told him quietly, then burst into tears. "All I've ever done was love you and want you. I only did what I did because I felt under appreciated in the relationship. And I tried so hard to just... keep you. But you were always talking about Caspar. Constantly. You even kept his stupid doll."

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xav
2013-01-09 09:26 am UTC (link)

Xavier looked down at Cepheus, feeling a wave of guilt wash over him. He was so sad and Xavier knew he'd done it to him. Everyone told him that this was how Cepheus felt.

"I didn't... I never wanted to make you feel like that," he said, calming down. "I didn't want to hurt you, Phe. I loved you. I wanted you. I just... I never knew I was making you feel like this."

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pheus
2013-01-09 09:36 am UTC (link)

"Putting a salon together and moving in with you was my last feeble attempt at keeping you." Cepheus told him, shaking his head. He reached up and pressed his palms into his eyes, rubbing at them. He didn't want to cry.

He fell onto the couch and shook his head. "You made me feel like it all the time." He told him quietly, looking up at him. "I just.. I saw a picture of him once. I knew where Caspar was. The whole time. I purposely tried to keep you away from him. Remember that show of West Side Story you wanted to see so badly? And I told you we couldn't go because I'd made plans with my family? He was in that."

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xav
2013-01-09 09:42 am UTC (link)

Xavier stared down at Cepheus, his sympathy and guilt warring with anger over being kept away from Caspar for longer than necessary. "That's not the way a relationship should be," he said. "If you don't trust me, then this hasn't been working for longer than I thought."

He ran a hand through his hair, messing it up. "We can't keep this up, Cepheus. I'm not going to keep you in a relationship that just... makes you unhappy and nothing else."

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	pheus 2013-01-09 09:47 am UTC (link)
	"If I don't have you, what am I going to do?" Cepheus asked as he looked back at Xavier. He shook his head. "You're... I love you. So much. I only did what I did so you'd stay with me." He fidgeted with his hands and then walked over to get his keys. He took the key off the ring and held it out to Xavier. "You can keep the flat. It's paid for." (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

xav
2013-01-09 09:53 am UTC (link)

Xavier looked down at the key for a moment, then took it from Cepheus. "Fine," he agreed. "You'll figure something out, Cepheus. I'm not your sole purpose. I shouldn't be. That's not healthy."

He ran a hand through his hair. "I love you too, Phe, but we can't... We're falling apart. It's better to end it now than when we hate each other completely. For cheating or spending time with other people or whatever else. We'll just keep hurting each other."

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pheus
2013-01-09 09:57 am UTC (link)

Cepheus's chest felt hollow. He reached up and rubbed at it absently, then leaned in and kissed Xavier one last time. He closed his eyes, a tear slipping down his cheek as he turned away.

"I'm sorry." He whispered before he walked out of the flat.

Sitting in his car for what must have been an hour, Cepheus finally took out his phone and texted James to meet him at a burger diner. He was going to get fat and not care.

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xav
2013-01-09 10:06 am UTC (link)

Xavier felt awful. He was a terrible person. Even if he hadn't meant to, he'd been hurting Cepheus for years, making him feel like he wasn't worth anything. It wasn't right and it wasn't fair.

Xavier still couldn't help thinking of Caspar. He pulled out his phone, texting him and asking to meet at a cafe by Caspar's, then leaving the flat before it could remind him anymore of how much Cepheus had loved him.

James wasn't expecting Cepheus's text, and a burger place seemed like a very odd choice for a Malfoy, but he texted back to agree to meet him. He hadn't been able to stop thinking about Cepheus since they'd spent the night and then the day tonight, but a suit seemed like a bit much for a burger place so he stuck to casual clothes.

He wasn't expecting Cepheus to look like he'd been crying for an hour. James frowned, sliding into the booth across from him. "What happened?" he asked. "You're upset."

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pheus
2013-01-09 10:14 pm UTC (link)

Caspar met Xavier where he wanted, at the coffee shop. He stepped in and looked around, finding him in the back. He frowned when he saw the state of him, wondering what was up.

"You okay?" He asked as he sat down beside him, reaching out to take his hand.

Cepheus looked at James for a moment and shook his head. "I went home." He explained. "It's not a big deal. I just don't have a place to stay right now. So I'm looking on my phone at listings."

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xav
2013-01-09 10:20 pm UTC (link)

Xavier looked up at Caspar when he walked in, feeling relieved when the other boy took his hand. "We broke up," he said. "It's official. It was... I wanted us to break up and it was still rough. I didn't expect that." He ran a hand through his hair. "Cepheus cried a lot. Told me some things. I didn't know, okay? I was making him so unhappy for so long and I had no idea."

James frowned at that. "You can stay with me for a bit," he said. "Until you get back on your feet. Or until I move out. I've already started packing, honestly. I'm looking into your dad's building. I bet your brother would let you stay with him if he and Al -- I mean, I saw he was with that porn star, but it's not like Albus has no feelings for him, you know?"

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pheus
2013-01-10 12:28 am UTC (link)

"I can't imagine you ever making anyone unhappy." Caspar shook his head and frowned. "That sounds ridiculous. You're a good person, Xavier. What did he say to you?" He asked, voice quiet.

"He's dating Albus now." Cepheus shook his head and looked down at his phone, searching through some listings. "Do you want a roommate?" He asked, glancing up at James. "As long as you're not a slob."

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xav
2013-01-10 12:34 am UTC (link)

"That I was always thinking of you when the two of us were together. That, even if it wasn't my intention, I was constantly reminding him that he was my second choice and I would rather have been with you," Xavier said. He ran a hand through his hair. "I'm not even sure I can disagree with him."

James was kind of a slob, but he usually hired a housekeeper. "I'm not," he said. "We could be roommates. We'd make good roommates. You could make our flat look nice and I wouldn't have to hire someone to make me look like a real person capable of living in style. It would be good."

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	pheus 2013-01-10 01:00 am UTC (link)
	"Why were you always thinking about me?" Caspar asked him quietly. Even if he liked the idea of it, he didn't want to be too smug or over excited about the idea. He gave him a soft smile. "I've thought a lot about you too." Cepheus looked back at James for a moment, then nodded. "Alright." He told him quietly. "But, we're not dating. We're just living together." (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

xav
2013-01-10 01:16 am UTC (link)

"You were my best friend and I lost you," Xavier said, smiling at Caspar. "Why wouldn't I always be thinking of you?" He reached across the table, taking Caspar's hand in his. "I want to be with you, Caspar. I'm just sorry I had to hurt Cepheus for this to happen."

"I know," James said, holding up his hands. "I wasn't asking you to marry me. Promise." He flagged down a waiter. "Have you ordered yet? I'm going to get a bacon cheeseburger, fries, and a shake. You should eat your feelings too."

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	pheus 2013-01-10 01:32 am UTC (link)
	"Well. When you're ready." Caspar told him, then pressed their lips together. "When you are ready, we can date. Because, I'm ready to date you. But, it would be in poor taste to start dating now." "Yeah. I ordered four burgers and a platter of chips with a milkshake." Cepheus told him, looking at him. "I eat my feelings all the time." (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

xav
2013-01-10 01:44 am UTC (link)

Xavier smiled at Caspar. "I'm glad you understand," he said, kissing his temple. "I want to date you, when it's acceptable for us to start dating, but not until we're both ready for this and nobody will think poorly of us for doing it. I want my friends to like you."

James gave Cepheus an impressed look. "You don't look like you've got room for four burgers in you," he said, looking him over. "I'm going to enjoy this. I promise not to steal any food." He placed his own order and then brushed his fingers through Cepheus's curly hair. "Bonus, nothing gets your parents off your back like a breakup. Mum just got grandma to make a million biscuits for me the last time I got dumped. No talk about where my life was going. Hey, do you want some biscuits? I could bake you some."

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	pheus 2013-01-10 03:02 am UTC (link)
	Caspar looked back at Xavier and nodded. "Of course." He told him, but leaned in and kissed the corner of his mouth. "Can we be friends with benefits?" He grinned. "You steal my food, you come back with a nub." Cepheus gave James a dangerous look, then laughed. He arched a brow. "You're going to bake me biscuits?" (Reply to this)(Parent)

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