Log In

Home
    - Create Journal
    - Update
    - Download

Scribbld
    - News
    - Paid Accounts
    - Invite
    - To-Do list
    - Contributors

Customize
    - Customize
    - Create Style
    - Edit Style

Find Users
    - Random!
    - By Region
    - By Interest
    - Search

Edit ...
    - User Info
    - Settings
    - Your Friends
    - Old Entries
    - Userpics
    - Password

Need Help?
    - Password?
    - FAQs
    - Support Area


Draco Malfoy ([info]lordlyheir) wrote in [info]paddedrooms,
@ 2012-07-07 17:09:00


Previous Entry  Add to memories!  Tell a Friend!  Next Entry
Draco didn't get visitors. He was allowed them, but his father wouldn't dream of coming to a place like this and his mother would need his father's permission to come. She wrote him letters and sent him food and sometimes clothing, but never visited. There wasn't anyone else to come see him. So it was very strange when one of the orderlies came to his room and interrupted the game of chess he was playing with himself to let him know he had a visitor. He assumed they'd got the wrong room at first, and then followed them out into the hall feeling very puzzled. Maybe his mother had gotten his father to agree to let her visit, but she would have called or written ahead, wouldn't she?

When Draco followed the orderly to the common area and saw Tom there, it didn't ease his confusion. He almost turned and went back to his room. Tom could make him fall apart again far, far too easily. The orderly left them standing nearish each other and Draco eyed the other man warily. "Hello," he said, looking around the common room. Fleur was reading a magazine and Luna was chewing on things again, but other than that it was empty. "Aren't you afraid someone's going to see you visiting a mental hospital?"


(Post a new comment)


[info]riddles
2012-07-07 10:06 pm UTC (link)
Tom didn't normally do these sorts of things. Like visit his ex lover in a mental institution. It wasn't as if Tom didn't care for the boy. He always had. It was just very odd to come to a mental institution to see him.

He straightened his tie and looked at Draco when he came into the room. "Draco." He frowned at the assumption. "No. I know people in high places, Draco. I am able to hide my personal life."

(Reply to this)(Thread)


[info]lordlyheir
2012-07-07 10:16 pm UTC (link)
"Of course." Draco nodded, feeling chastised by the frown the way he always had when it was obvious he'd displeased Tom. He hated the way he already ached to have some sign of his approval now that he'd done something Tom disapproved of.

"I suppose most people here wouldn't be able to gossip anyway. They're stuck in place." Draco glanced at the two girls in the common room and then at Tom again. "It's good to see you. It's... unexpected."

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)


[info]riddles
2012-07-07 11:18 pm UTC (link)
Tom looked Draco over carefully. He knew that he was part of the reason that Draco was in here. Because he'd cast him aside and broke his heart. Or whatever it was that he was telling his therapist.

"Would you like to go to your room?" Tom asked as he looked around and frowned at some of the people. "So that you and I can be alone? Or would you rather I leave?"

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)


[info]lordlyheir
2012-07-07 11:23 pm UTC (link)
"No, we can go to my room," Draco told Tom, shaking his head. It was weak, but this was the first time anyone had visited him. He didn't want everyone else to think his guest had run away as soon as he's arrived.

He reached out to take Tom's hand, then caught himself and turned to lead him down the hall, putting his hands firmly in his pockets. "This way. It's not far." He led him to his room, pushing the door open and sitting on the edge of his bed.

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)


[info]riddles
2012-07-07 11:56 pm UTC (link)
Tom watched Draco walk ahead of him. In all honesty, he'd never meant to make him go crazy. He had once cared deeply for the other boy. And maybe he felt guilty about him being in a place like this.

"Your father tells me this is one of the best facilities in Europe." Tom told him. "Do you like it here?"

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)


[info]lordlyheir
2012-07-08 12:10 am UTC (link)
"No," Draco said, looking up at Tom and doing his best not to feel hurt. Tom wasn't trying to hurt him. He was just visiting. He was probably feeling guilty and coming here to make himself feel better before he went off to live his life with his pretty, blonde wife.

"Would you? It's a mental hospital, not a five star resort. The service here isn't exactly first class." Draco pulled his feet up on the bed, crossing them under himself and giving up on looking self-assured. It wasn't like Tom didn't know he was crazy.

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)


[info]riddles
2012-07-08 12:38 am UTC (link)
"No. Of course I wouldn't." Tom wasn't sure how to be with Draco now that things had happened with them the way that they had. He looked Draco over for a moment, then reached out and touched his wrist. "I'm sorry that you are here. This was never my intention."

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)


[info]lordlyheir
2012-07-08 12:43 am UTC (link)
Draco looked up at Tom and shrugged. "It's not all your fault," he told him. "My father was looking for an excuse to shunt me off somewhere anyway. Boarding school was very convenient for him. This is much cheaper anyway, and he doesn't have to see me summers and holidays." He chewed on the inside of his cheek for a moment, then brushed his fingers against Tom's. "You should sit, unless you're leaving now that you've said sorry."

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)


[info]riddles
2012-07-08 01:01 am UTC (link)
"No. I set aside time to spend with you today." Tom told him quietly and shook his head. "I thought I'd come here and spend a few hours with you. Just so you'd know that someone cares about you. I've kept tabs on you here."

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)


[info]lordlyheir
2012-07-08 01:07 am UTC (link)
"Tabs?" Draco repeated, frowning slightly. Having company was nice, but he wasn't sure how he felt about someone checking up on him like that. He ran a hand through his hair. "What sort of tabs? Through who?"

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)


[info]riddles
2012-07-08 01:15 am UTC (link)
"I've just asked how you are. Made sure you're getting the things you want." Tom replied and looked Draco over. "I'm the one who made sure that you got the nice bed that you have. I couldn't imagine you sleeping on anything hard or lumpy."

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)


[info]lordlyheir
2012-07-08 01:19 am UTC (link)
"I thought there was an upgrade when I moved floors after the first month," Draco said, glancing down at his mattress. He wondered what Radley had to sleep on across the room. "I suppose you know about me swallowing a bottle of pills, then. That wasn't my finest hour."

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)


[info]riddles
2012-07-08 01:30 am UTC (link)
"No. It wasn't your finest hours. Certainly not." Tom looked Draco over carefully. He wasn't the best with emotions, but he did try. And he wanted to try and understand Draco and why he'd done what he'd done.

"Why?" Tom asked as he sat on the bed beside Draco. "Why did you do it?"

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)


[info]lordlyheir
2012-07-08 01:34 am UTC (link)
Draco looked at Tom and shrugged, bringing his knees up to his chest. "I don't really know," he said. "At the time, it seemed like a good idea. It doesn't anymore. I know it was stupid. It just made sure they kept me here longer. But... I don't know. I did it because I was lonely, I guess. And tired."

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)


[info]riddles
2012-07-08 02:12 am UTC (link)
Tom looked back at Draco for a moment. "I'm sorry." He told him, not sure what else he could really say. He'd never meant to hurt Draco the way that he'd hurt him. He sighed softly and then touched the other boy's hand. "You must really hate me for what I did to you. I'm sorry that you ended up here."

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)


[info]lordlyheir
2012-07-08 02:27 am UTC (link)
"I don't, actually," Draco said, looking at Tom. He really did seem sorry. Maybe not as sorry as Draco had pictured him in his more dramatic fantasies, but still sorry, and it was a little comforting. "I sort of wish I could, but I really don't. I don't even really blame you for ending up in here. You were -- are -- married and you have a kid and I'm... I mean, it was stupid for me to think anything other than what happened could have come out of the two of us being together, you know? I just hurt really badly when you ended it because you were the first person I ever fell in love with."

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)


[info]riddles
2012-07-08 03:09 am UTC (link)
Tom ran his eyes over Draco briefly before he touched Draco's hair. He'd never been in love with him, but he understood what Draco was feeling. To a degree. He sighed softly and shook his head. "You shouldn't have fallen in love with me. I'm not even worth it, Draco. You're so young and vibrant. Attractive."

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)


[info]lordlyheir
2012-07-08 03:16 am UTC (link)
Draco leaned into Tom's touch, looking up at him. "Why does my age matter? If you didn't want me to fall in love with you then you shouldn't have made it so easy to be with you. I didn't think I was going to fall for you. I just... thought it would be fun."

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)


[info]riddles
2012-07-08 03:37 am UTC (link)
Tom looked down at Draco and then sighed softly. "I cared for you." He told him quietly and then touched his cheek. "I still do. I... God, Draco. I'm sorry that you are here I never meant for you to be here. I wish you could go home."

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)


[info]lordlyheir
2012-07-08 03:41 am UTC (link)
"Me too," Draco said, voice soft. He looked at Tom for a long moment, then leaned forward and pressed their lips together, eyes slipping shut for a moment as he tried to memorize the feeling. He drew back a little. "Sorry. I just... wanted to."

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)


[info]riddles
2012-07-08 03:51 am UTC (link)
The kiss had been unexpected, but it wasn't unwelcome. He touched Draco's cheek again and then pressed their foreheads together. "Do you forgive me?" He asked, pulling Draco a little closer.

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)


[info]lordlyheir
2012-07-08 04:03 am UTC (link)
Any resolve Draco had had about not letting himself fall for Tom again was fast dissolving. He nodded. "I forgive you," he said, reaching up and touching Tom's cheek, brushing his thumb over it. "Of course. It wasn't even really your fault."

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)


[info]riddles
2012-07-08 04:17 am UTC (link)
Tom nodded and then pulled him a little closer, so that he was pressed firmly against his chest. He closed his eyes and just held him, then ran his fingers through his hair. "Is there anything you need while you're here? I can get you anything."

(Reply to this)(Parent)


[info]lordlyheir
2012-07-08 04:26 am UTC (link)
Draco closed his eyes, resting his head on Tom's shoulder and wrapping his arms around his neck. It was so easy to be this close to him and it felt good. It felt like Tom cared. Had he really gotten to a point where he was so desperate for someone to care about him that he'd gone around pretending his therapist did? Snape was just taking his father's money and keeping Draco out of the way. Tom didn't have to be here. "Books would be nice," he said. "I'm reading the same three over and over again. There's only so many times I can read Tess of the D'Urbervilles and Heart of Darkness before I want something new, and the other book is The Wizard of Oz. The selection here isn't great."

(Reply to this)(Thread)


[info]riddles
2012-07-08 04:39 am UTC (link)
"I can send you some books. I'll send you better ones." Tom promised him and then snorted. "The Wizard of Oz? That's the rubbish they have here? Is that for people who want to live in a fantasy world?" He arched a brow and then shook his head. "Is there anything else you'd like? Sweets? New clothes?"

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)


[info]lordlyheir
2012-07-08 04:42 am UTC (link)
"My mother sends my sweets fairly often," Draco admitted. "Whenever she writes. About once every two or three weeks." He looked down at himself and then laughed a little. "I could use new clothes. She doesn't send those nearly as often and it's not like they offer dry cleaning here. Silk-cotton blends don't take industrial washing machines very well."

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)


[info]riddles
2012-07-08 05:27 am UTC (link)
Tom nodded and looked back at Draco. Maybe he felt guilty about everything that had happened. But, he wanted to make Draco happy again. He gave him a tight smile. "I can send you some t-shirts and denims if those would be comfortable."

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)


[info]lordlyheir
2012-07-08 05:33 am UTC (link)
Draco nodded. "That would be good," he said. He brushed his fingers through the hair at the nape of Tom's neck. Everything about him still felt the same. "Thank you. I... If I got out of here do you think things could ever go back to the way things were before?"

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)


[info]riddles
2012-07-08 09:10 pm UTC (link)
That was a loaded question. Tom looked back down at Draco and touched his side, shrugging. "I don't know." He admitted quietly as he looked him over. "What if you hate me?"

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)


[info]lordlyheir
2012-07-08 10:27 pm UTC (link)
"I won't hate you," Draco promised. "I'll have a music more realistic view of what to expect this time. I'm not going to get caught up thinking anything could be more than what it is." But he could still have someone who paid attention to him and cared about how he was, even if Tom didn't love him and wasn't going to leave his family for him. "And... there's a girl here. She's expected to marry the same way I am. We talked about arranging it ourselves so we'd have freedom to do what we wanted outside of being together."

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)


[info]riddles
2012-07-08 10:31 pm UTC (link)
Tom really didn't want that for Draco. He knew how horrible it was to be in a marriage to a woman that you couldn't love, but he knew it wasn't something that Draco could actually be able to get out of.

"I think that sounds good for you." Tom told him quietly and then took the boy's hand into his own. "Whatever makes you happiest."

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)


[info]lordlyheir
2012-07-08 10:38 pm UTC (link)
Draco would be happiest with someone he could have both a physical and emotional relationship with, but that wasn't really an option for him. This was the next best thing, taking the two things and getting them from two different people. "I think it would work," he said. "If I had a wife who understood and I could still have a lover. That could make me happy."

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)


[info]riddles
2012-07-08 11:09 pm UTC (link)
"I'll support you in whatever you do." Tom told him quietly and nodded. "You know that it's what I had to do. Get married to a woman that I will never love. Not that I don't love her. She's just.. not what I was looking for."

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)


[info]lordlyheir
2012-07-08 11:13 pm UTC (link)
"My father doesn't have any other legitimate children as heir," Draco said, shrugging. "I care about the family, even if he thinks I don't. I know what I have to do. I can't be gay. Even if... everyone knows I am now. I'm sure my father's had a nightmare cleaning up my scandal."

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)


[info]riddles
2012-07-08 11:31 pm UTC (link)
"I wouldn't know. I haven't spoke to your father, but I don't think it got too far out there." Tom admitted and then looked Draco over carefully. "Once you're out, people will see how well you've recovered and you'll be in their hearts."

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)


[info]lordlyheir
2012-07-08 11:33 pm UTC (link)
"Haven't you?" Draco gave Tom a slightly surprised look. "I've been in here for a few months now. I'd have thought work would mean you had to speak to him. I suppose that doesn't mean either of you would have to bring me up." He ran a hand through his hair. "I hope I recover well."

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)


[info]riddles
2012-07-08 11:39 pm UTC (link)
"Our jobs don't require us to have hands on experience with each other. I can talk to him through my people to his." Tom admitted and then laughed softly. "I only spent so much time at first, with him, so I could get closer to you."

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)


[info]lordlyheir
2012-07-09 12:07 am UTC (link)
"Really?" Draco smiled at Tom, leaning against him a little bit more. "Well, I'm flattered. I suppose I should have figured it out when you flirted with me at his business parties instead of wooing benefactors."

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)


[info]riddles
2012-07-09 03:32 am UTC (link)
"I did both. I was just more... focused on flirting with you. That's all." Tom smiled at Draco. Maybe now the other boy could understand that he was in a relationship with a woman and that he was a public figure. "What else do you need?"

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)


[info]lordlyheir
2012-07-09 03:40 am UTC (link)
"I don't know if there's anything else I need that you can get me," Draco said, after a moment. He brushed his lips against the other man's neck. He wished he could change things. Make Tom love him, or make his family different, but he couldn't and if he wanted to get out of the hospital he had to accept those things. "I'm sorry too. About the way I was acting before I came here."

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)


[info]riddles
2012-07-09 03:52 am UTC (link)
"It's okay, Draco." Tom assured him and then leaned in, kissing him softly for a long moment. He pulled back slightly and gave him a small smile. "I should leave and go find the things you wanted. There's a book shop just down the way."

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)


[info]lordlyheir
2012-07-09 04:25 am UTC (link)
Draco didn't want Tom to go. This was the first time Draco had felt sane since arriving at the hospital. Asking him to stay wasn't sane though. "I'll miss you," he said, before he could stop himself. He was back here again. Back watching Tom leave his room, hoping he'd come back eventually.

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)


[info]riddles
2012-07-09 04:30 am UTC (link)
"I'll be back." Tom promised him and then touched Draco's hair, running his fingers through it. Just as he always had. The problem had never been Draco. It had been his actions. "I promise."

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)


[info]lordlyheir
2012-07-09 04:38 am UTC (link)
Draco leaned into Tom's familiar touch, just as he always had, and wished he was smarter or stronger or better than this. He knew he wasn't. "Thank you," he said, giving him a faint smile. "I'm looking forward to the books."

(Reply to this)(Parent)




scribbld is part of the horse.13 network
Design by Jimmy B.
Logo created by hitsuzen.
Scribbld System Status