UsernameEmailRegionInterestAOL IMICQ IDYahoo! IDMSN IDJabber

Dean just hoped he didn’t cry, that was the last thing he wanted, and wanted to see. Hurting his best friend was the hardest thing to do, and if he could feel the way he had at the beginning of the year for Sam he would. Stewart just some how grew to something far more than he had ever expected it too. He had always thought that being with Stewart was just a way to make Sam come to his senses and see how being fucked with hurt. Dean never expected to make himself fall head over heels as quickly with Stewart as he did. Perhaps it was the fact Sam was dating some girl, or just that the three year crush had run its course. Whatever it was Dean wished it wasn’t true, right at this moment as he was being yelled at and called a liar by his best friend. Nothing hurt more than this.

“Why the fuck would I enjoy this Sam? What the fuck makes you think I wanted this to happen. It just did. My want for you friendship completely out weighed my feelings for you as they were at the beginning of the year. I did like you, I was crazy about you. And then he happened. I can’t explain it, but that is just what happened. It fucking hurts to see you like this, and it hurts ten times more to know I’m doing it.” Dean looked at Sam, afraid of what was going to happen and wondered if this was impossible to make work again. This was killing him and all he wanted to do was reverse time and take it all back. He would rather be stuck pining for Sam then actually having him even for the brief time he did. Dean felt he never truly did have, until it was too late.

Dean looked at Sam, his own body shake and knew he would cry. He wanted to hold onto Sam, he wanted to do something. He still cared about him, and for Dean that was saying a lot. He never usually gave a damn about anyone, but Sam was who he cared about like a brother. He loved him like a brother. Dean didn’t know how his obsession with him turned into platonic love, but it had.

Screw what his mind was telling him to do and he moved closer to Sam, he wanted to hug him but would Sam let him? “I’m so sorry.” He said as his own tears started. He placed a hand on his shoulder at first but then moved to hug him. Dean was ready to be pushed away, despite how much it would break his heart to be pushed away he was ready for it.