It's important to remember that you didn't kill this person; someone else did. If you did all that you could to save them, then you shouldn't blame yourself.
That said, the self-loathing and anger are hard to get away from. Some people run away from and change their lives to try to forget. Others sacrifice their own freedom in some misguided attempt to pay for something they aren't responsible for.
I can't tell you how to make peace with it. What I can tell you is to do everything you can to help the next person you come across, and the person after that, and every person after that. Never give up.
The person whose passing you witnessed wouldn't want to be the reason you stopped doing what you do.
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