well, jord called me last night. i talked to him about how i felt. he apologized for not understanding how i feel, and not taking that in to consideration. he said that he only hooked up with the other girl bc justin told him that we fucked. when we clearly didnt, when i went to hang out with him i think i talked about jord the whole time. and thank god jord believes me, bc i could never do that, plus his friend is like idk.. odd. so we talked some more. He understands now, hopefully he said he's going to try to work with me. but for right now we're just friends, we both decided that maybe it is best if we see what's out there and you know in the long run if we do realize we want to be together then we will, but right now we're friends. he said he'd always be around for me though, and that i'm the only one that will truely make him happy, well we will see how that goes. maybe it's true. But i don't want anything serious, i can't go into college with anything serious it's not fair to me or him. I still fucking love him to pieces, and i believe i always will. I love him and care about him so much, but right now i just have to put MYSELF first for once. and it's so hard for me to do that. but I know i wont regret it. I know we'll probably end up getting married, but not for awhille. I love him (=
we're suppose to hang out today, i will update and tell you all how it goes. .
this weekend = AMY for sure. !! aahhh so excitedd
ha im like obsessed i can't stop looking at stuff about it..
mmmm so ecitedd
well peace out
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