alfredo (alfredo) wrote,
@ 2009-07-09 22:50:00

All right, so this war thing has got to end. Tomorrow. Yesterday, in fact. My mother is considering paying for me to go back to school early because she's afraid I'll get bombed or something. I keep telling her I'm every bit as safe in the Hollow as I would be at school, but she really doesn't believe me. I told her I'm not going back to school early. I'm staying right here, and she'll have to drag me back if she wants me there before August thirty first. Anyway, I've been practicing Quidditch a whole lot, and that's about it. I intend to tell my professors that I lost my homework for over the summer, and then they'll let me have a week. At least a week. I mean, honestly...weren't OWL's enough for them?

Oh, by the way, how did everyone do on those? THREE O'S, ONE A, TWO E'S...BELIEVE ME WHEN I SAY I'M THE BEST.

Almost the best.
No one rub in better scores, now.
You know you like being nice to me and not cruel. Really.

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	olivebranch 2009-07-10 06:27 am UTC (link)
	LE GASP. If you don't visit me, well I might just die, Alfredo. (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

	alfredo 2009-07-10 06:36 am UTC (link)
	Will you really die? Because if you'll really die, I might just come anyway for the funeral and to get my share of the will. I better be in the will. (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

	olivebranch 2009-07-10 02:44 pm UTC (link)
	YOUR UNCARINGNESS APALLS ME. If you think you're going to be in the will now, THINK AGAIN. (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

	alfredo 2009-07-10 02:51 pm UTC (link)
	I already said I love you today, Liv-Liv. If I say it twice, people will think funny things. Can I at least have the present when I come? And maybe dinner, because I'll be hungry... (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

	olivebranch 2009-07-10 02:55 pm UTC (link)
	I wasn't asking for your love, Fredo, just your APPRECIATION. And who cares if people think funny things? It's about time they learn of our PASSIONATE LOVE FOR ONE ANOTHER. I will owl it to you. It will prolong the suspense. But I will make you dinner. The usual dinner, of course. (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

	alfredo 2009-07-10 02:59 pm UTC (link)
	I appreciate everything about you. KEEP THE PASSION DOWN, WHEN WE RUN AWAY TO AMERICA AND ELOPE, WE WANT IT TO BE A SURPRISE. I cannot wait. Don't burn anything this time. Let your mother cook. (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

olivebranch
2009-07-10 03:03 pm UTC (link)

Remember what I said about flattery? Forget it. I love being flattered. Keep it coming.
BUT IT'S SO HARD. OH, ALFRED, I JUST WANT TO LEAP INTO YOUR ARMS AND PROCLAIM MY LOVE FOR YOU RIGHT THIS VERY MOMENT.

My mother doesn't have time to cook, dummy. Liam will probably be too busy dying or something so she'll have to take care of him. I AM A GREAT COOK. DO NOT INSULT MY COOKING OR MAYBE I'LL BURN IT ON PURPOSE.

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

alfredo
2009-07-10 03:10 pm UTC (link)

Flattery? I'm good at that. You're the prettiest girl I know. You smell like flowers. Shall I continue?
HIDE YOUR LOVE MY LITTLE OLIVE, AND SOMEDAY YOU WILL BE MINE.

I'LL INSULT WHATEVER I WANT TO INSULT. If you burn it, I won't eat it. I will throw it in Liam's face, he'll suffocate and die, and then I'll never be allowed to see you again. IS THAT WHAT YOU WANT, OLIVE HORNBY? IS IT?

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

	olivebranch 2009-07-10 03:18 pm UTC (link)
	PLEASE DO. Am I really the prettiest girl you know? You are faaar too kind. I WILL TRY, MY SWEET DELECTABLE ALFREDO SAUCE, BUT IT PAINS ME TO WAIT. Is it bad to say I wouldn't mind if you did that. IT IS BAD, ISN'T IT. BUT I DON"T WANT TO NOT SEE YOU. Fine. YOU make it, then. (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

	alfredo 2009-07-10 03:23 pm UTC (link)
	The very prettiest. And yes, I am too kind. Because you're awfully mean sometimes. YOU WANT ME TO KILL YOUR BROTHER??? WHAT ARE YOU? A MONSTER? A HITLER? A SLYTHERIN? (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

	olivebranch 2009-07-10 03:31 pm UTC (link)
	IT WAS A JOKE, SERIOUSLY. (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

	alfredo 2009-07-10 03:35 pm UTC (link)
	Good. If you suffocate people, at least make it in something delicious. Like pudding. That would be a painless way to go. (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

	olivebranch 2009-07-11 12:47 am UTC (link)
	If i'm about to die of something awful, Alfredo, smother me with pudding. If you don't I will haunt you FOREVER. (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

	alfredo 2009-07-11 04:56 am UTC (link)
	I would love to smother you in pudding to your death. Well...only if you need it. I'm not going to do that just to be creepy or to kill you. Basically, I do not want you dead. Don't die, my Olive. (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

olivebranch
2009-07-11 03:34 pm UTC (link)

Then we have an agreement! Would you like me to smother you in pudding to your death as well? Because I absolutely will. But not because I want to kill you, just because I have a kind heart.

AW, of course you don't want me dead. Who else would make you delicious meals that ARE NOT burned and proclaim their undying love for you on a daily basis and call you Alfredo sauce as lovingly as I???

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

	alfredo 2009-07-11 10:43 pm UTC (link)
	I would definitely like for you to do that, my love. I know it will pain you deeply, but I know you can do it so that you will not see me in pain. No one else, that's who. Actually, that's not true, there are a lot of girls who proclaim their love for me daily. You're just the only one who insists on being named Olive Hornby, and that makes a difference, you know (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

	olivebranch 2009-07-12 09:06 am UTC (link)
	It pains me to see you in pain. Even the slightest cut upon your delicate pale skin makes my heart ache, darling. Those other girls don't count. In fact, I think I am going to ban other girls from proclaiming alfred love. That way you will have my love and my love only. Sort of like we're married, but without all that irritating marriage stuff. (Reply to this)(Parent)

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