Current mood:	restless
Current music:	Australian Cast - The Rum Tum Tugger

Dorothy Parker says it best
I do not like my state of mind;
I'm bitter, querulous, unkind.
I hate my legs, I hate my hands,
I do not yearn for lovelier lands.
I dread the dawn's recurrent light;
I hate to go to bed at night.
I snoot at simple, earnest folk.
I cannot take the gentlest joke.
I find no peace in paint or type.
My world is but a lot of tripe.
I'm disillusioned, empty-breasted.
For what I think, I'd be arrested.
I am not sick, I am not well.
My quondam dreams are shot to hell.
My soul is crushed, my spirit sore;
I do not like me any more.
I cavil, quarrel, grumble, grouse.
I ponder on the narrow house.
I shudder at the thought of men....
I'm due to fall in love again.

Only it's not a person I need to fall in love with. I need... a new fandom, a new obsession, something I can throw myself into. I'm spinning my wheels and writer's-blocked. I need that wonderful rush of excitement, that spark.

...what I need is a bit of hypomania that isn't my usual dysphoric hypomania, is what I'm really saying, I suppose. Fucking meds.