Lavender to Parvati. How much she really respects Parvati, because she's not sure that gets across. Sure, Parvati's her BFFL, but she honest to God, values and respects Parvati more than most people she knows. Almost as much as her brother, which is saying something. Also, that she's kind of jealous of how smart and together Parvati is, and how it's really just so obvious she's heading places, where as Lavender has no idea what's going to happen to her.
PP to Melinda. Would you like some no-strings-attached, perfectly disease-free, bent-over-a-desk sex? Daphne doesn't need to know.
Lavender to Michael. That he's kind of absurdly fit, but he seriously needs to take his head out of his ass about this whole player thing and just pick someone. The charm and suave are totally cool, but girls are MUCH more attracted to someone steady, sorry! Also, his cheekbones are fabulous.
Brad to Sarah. "OH MY FUCK WILL YOU JUST STOP TALKING FOR LIKE FIVE BLOODY SECONDS, YOU HORRID BLOODY COW? FUCK ME, BUT YOUR SHRIEKING HARPY CRIES ARE MAKING ME BLEED OUT OF MY OWN EARS." And then he'd tell her to open her pretty brown eyes and take a look outside her own bubble. And would she like to maybe have sex some time.
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