If I could only hold you now, make the pain just go away  
08:16pm 28/05/2008
εϊз Here is me in tragedy εϊз
Can't stop the tears from running down my face...

For approximately three wonderful years... I've had my Narcy. Since last Sunday I've been up and by her side. I haven't slept much, or eaten for that matter. I would only dream and think of her. I will say one thing... I'm glad she's at peace now. She was suffering.

The one vet we got a hold of is in Kendall, and obviously we have no way of getting there. We talked to the doctor, and all he said was to wait it out... Yeah. Right. Now poor Narcy is not with us anymore. But there wasn't much he could do without taking a look at the rabbit in the first place.

I know from the bottom of my heart, my mom and I tried everything we could. And to you, my dearest friends, thank you for all the support and advice. It meant the world to me then, and it means the world to me now.

I let her wander around the backyard just an hour ago. She looked so happy... she was running all around the backyard going up to the rest of the rabbits. My mom thinks that she was saying goodbye to them, in her own way. When I brought her in, she started convulsing. The first thing I thought back to was Fester... how that's what happened before he...

My mom told me to leave. I didn't want to, but then I started crying hysterically. She ordered me to leave the kitchen. I did. I continued to cry in that manner.

But then I realized I was being selfish. God only knows how much the poor little fluff ball was suffering. I wanted to say my goodbye... but I don't think I was gonna be able to take it. I couldn't see her die. I couldn't! I want to start crying again.

To many that don't understand my passion for rabbits, would say I'm being ridiculous. My dad... I knew he wouldn't take me to a vet knowing that my bunny was sick. He never would, he despises rabbits. Till this day he still wants me to get rid of all the ones I have. Fuck you, dad. I love you, but no way am I getting rid of darlings.

I just thanked all things holy that my mom is all right, that everyone is okay. I'm trying to think optimistically to bring me some peace of mind I guess. But for years, I haven't known what peace of mind is...

R.I.P Narcy.... just like Fester you'll always be in my heart. Always.

Poor thing looks frightened, and really wants to tear my digi cam away. :| Damn Narcy even now your bunny glare of doom scares me to no end... >.>; I want to hug you so bad right now.
mood: listless listless
music: Delta Goodrem - Lost Without You
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