crucio (crucio) wrote in cwf,
@ 2011-02-26 00:12:00

to joshua
Two and a half months was much too long to go without seeing Joshua. They kept in touch, yes - but it wasn't the same as being next to him or being with him. Never in a million years would Andrew have guessed he'd form such a bond and connection with the wolf when he bid on him and took him home as a treasured pet. To think of his mindset back then made Andrew sick. It made him feel ashamed. But he wasn't the same person anymore, and that's what mattered, he supposed.

Once the twins were settled, and his father spoke with Hunter, Andrew went out to find Joshua. He slipped into the room that belonged to Josh, but when his boyfriend wasn't there, he went across the hall to the little one's room. Sure enough, that's where he was, tucked in the tiny bed with the two of them and a book on his chest. They'd all fallen asleep. Andrew smiled a little before he went over and reached out to brush some of Josh's hair out of his face. It'd gotten longer, even in just two months.

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impotentwaffle
2011-03-10 04:48 pm UTC (link)

Joshua hated that sad expression. He wished he could go back in time and tell his past self that Andrew was a good person despite evidence to the contrary. But he had to content himself with knowing that things had worked out for them.

"I like the idea that you wanted me as soon as you saw me. Sometimes I even like the idea that I belong to you, that you own me in the eyes of sorcerers everywhere." The time away from Andrew had made him confront how much he really needed him and that maybe it wasn't so bad to belong to someone.

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crucio
2011-03-12 10:50 pm UTC (link)

Andrew smiled a little bit, but only because he knew that Joshua was trying to cheer him up a bit. Turning onto his side, he hooked an arm around Joshua's waist and tugged him in firmly against his side so that he could give him a kiss on the mouth.

"You're sweet," he mumbled. "I'm lucky that you're so forgiving. I know the others here think I'm... not so great of a person because of what I did to you." Like Logan, for instance.

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impotentwaffle
2011-03-13 05:09 am UTC (link)

Joshua couldn't help but think of Logan first when Andrew said that, even though there were more than a few who were leery of how Andrew and Joshua had gotten together.

Thinking about the other wolf made him frown a little and press his face in against Andrew's chest because he didn't want the other to see it. He offered a shrug. "In the wild, stronger things dominate and kill weaker things all the time. No one flinches when we kill a deer. If a sorcerer is stronger, I wonder if maybe they don't have the right to do whatever they want to people weaker than them." It was a bit of his alpha logic talking, the sort that was all for dominating rather than protecting. He still had a lot to work out as he grew up. Fortunately, he was in the right place to do it.

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crucio
2011-03-13 05:36 am UTC (link)

Somehow Andrew could always sense when Joshua was thinking of Logan. It made him more jealous than anything. He hated that he couldn't connect to Joshua the way that Logan could, or any other wolf for that matter. It drove him insane, but he didn't talk about it.

"I don't know about that," he mumbled softly. "I just know I'm glad I have you is all. You could have very easily picked someone else."

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	impotentwaffle 2011-03-13 05:52 am UTC (link)
	Falling into quiet contemplation, Joshua mulled over what he'd just said. Maybe he would ask Hunter about it. Finally, he spoke. "I couldn't have picked anyone else. It just wouldn't have worked out. It wouldn't be the same and I wouldn't be as happy." He was almost sure of that. A part of him really believed in fate, in the matters of love anyway. (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

crucio
2011-03-13 06:10 am UTC (link)

Andrew ran his fingers back and forth through Joshua's hair as he laid there next to him, and he moved to tangle their legs up together. He liked what Joshua had to say, and it made him smile a bit. It even put him at ease, some.

"I think Logan wanted you, I think he still does," he admitted softly. "It drives me crazy. Sometimes he just gives me this look that says he has access to a part of you I can never have."

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impotentwaffle
2011-03-13 03:30 pm UTC (link)

"Logan has Moon now," he said quietly. It wasn't fair to be annoyed by that, but Joshua was anyway. Maybe that meant he still kind of wanted Logan too, but it really didn't matter. Nothing would ever be worth giving up Andrew.

After a second, he looked up at Andrew with a weird look on his face. "He does not give you looks like that." Joshua didn't want to believe that Logan would wheedle Andrew. Then again, he poked at Moon all the time.

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crucio
2011-03-14 04:18 am UTC (link)

"Just because he has Moon doesn't mean he doesn't still want you," Andrew pointed out matter-of-factly. He wasn't stupid. "And he does, he looks at me like that all of the time. I know how your kind works - how you mate, and how you can't ever properly mate to me. He looks at me like he's saying he could do that, he could have that with you and I can't. I'm not stupid, Joshua - I know what jealousy looks like. I get jealous enough over him all of the time to know. We're jealous of each other."

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impotentwaffle
2011-03-15 01:50 am UTC (link)

Joshua pursed his lips tightly together and rolled over so that his back was facing Andrew. "I don't want to talk about Logan." Even if he'd grown up a lot since coming to Wolf Haven, Joshua could still pout with the best of them. Times like this always betrayed his youth.

He didn't like thinking about Logan because it made him feel guilty and a little afraid that Andrew would give up on him if he felt like he couldn't really be his mate.

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crucio
2011-03-15 02:11 am UTC (link)

Andrew frowned when Joshua put his back to him like that. He turned onto his side more fully so that he could press his chest up against Joshua's back, and an arm slipped around his waist to hold onto him.

"Don't be cranky," he mumbled, brushing a kiss to the back of one of Joshua's shoulders. "I might be jealous, but he doesn't intimidate me. I'm the one that you chose, I'm the one that has you. Not him."

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impotentwaffle
2011-03-15 03:09 am UTC (link)

"Maybe I should bite you," he said. Part of his tone was serious, the other part a little cruel, almost mocking. If Andrew really felt jealous of Logan, then maybe Joshua could make them equal.

He stayed with his back facing him, but he did relax a little into the older man's chest. Andrew's body felt so good to him that he wasn't about to deny himself access to it after so long.

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	crucio 2011-03-15 03:33 am UTC (link)
	"Yeah, I'm sure Hunter would just love that," Andrew joked as he closed his eyes and pressed his face against the back of Joshua's neck. "I missed you," he added, his voice softening as he changed the subject to something else entirely. (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

	impotentwaffle 2011-03-16 03:55 pm UTC (link)
	"Yeah, well what does Hunter know? He's in love with a werewolf." Joshua was still in a grouchy mood and sometimes it was hard to pull him out of it. Maybe he even missed fighting with Andrew and he was eager to get back to that feeling too. But at the next words, Joshua had to suppress a smile and eventually he sighed. "I missed you too." (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

	crucio 2011-03-17 02:03 am UTC (link)
	Andrew let out a bit of a laugh and he closed his eyes as he inhaled Joshua's scent. He'd really missed how warm the other could be, and whenever he got cold at night when he was away, he'd think about how warm Joshua always made him. "You're better than any blanket I've ever had," he teased softly. (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

	impotentwaffle 2011-03-17 02:09 am UTC (link)
	Joshua finally rolled back over, squirming around until he could face Andrew. Wrapping his arms around him, he settled back down. "I'm a portable space heater. Just wait until summer hits again." He smirked and pictured them lying sprawled out, still touching, but with a little more space between their tangled limbs. (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

	crucio 2011-03-17 03:03 am UTC (link)
	When Joshua squirmed around to face him, he smiled and brushed a kiss to his mouth. He smiled a bit and closed his eyes with a little yawn. "Then we really won't sleep with any clothes on at all, well - maybe we'll have to at least have some pants on in case the little ones come along," he mumbled. (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

	impotentwaffle 2011-03-17 03:07 am UTC (link)
	"You'll have to wear pants. They've seen me naked before." He smirked with a little triumph. The idea of Andrew forced to sweat in pants while he rolled about free as a bird was kind of amusing. He wanted to stay awake, enjoying the fact that Andrew was finally home. But after their ruckus little session, he couldn't keep his eyes open. (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

	crucio 2011-03-20 02:06 am UTC (link)
	"If you're not going to wear pants then I'll just molest you and then we'll both be pantless all of the time and they'll see us both naked," Andrew pointed out, though he noticed that Joshua's eyes were closing on him. With a laugh, he dipped his head down and brushed a kiss against his mouth, then he settled in and closed his eyes to get some sleep as well. (Reply to this)(Parent)

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