HYUUGA NEJI (infrawhite) wrote,
@ 2011-09-20 23:32:00

[ meme | questions ]
That bandwagon, do you remember it?

I do. I'm late.

I know.

You go. Ask ask ask.

Sticky post is up forever.

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infrawhite
2009-10-04 08:49 pm UTC (link)

Oh, he probably felt plenty ridiculous about how Naruto made him feel at times, just a little more free than he was already aware of, just a little less complicated than he sometimes tends to be. This, multiplied by almost eight years, results in a Better Neji. A more comfortable Neji. And above all, a Neji with freedom in his near grasp. Naruto is the one he dares to do something dangerous with, and while he wants to be his calming voice of reason, if it's any feeling Neji can relate to, Naruto has his back. But he'll do it with style. Something reckless sometimes needs to be done to achieve what's very worth it. That is, among other things, what gave him the strength to push off his family, get the hell out of there and enter this world.

Naruto is a retard, and he'll never doubt that for long enough to make the thought stick, but he has come to forgive him a lot of stupidities, both because he doesn't know what he'd do with himself without that annoying dimwit in his life (and trust him, he's sure there's many of those out there, but which of them is Naruto?) and because there's this one stuck-up fourteen-year-old pretty boy that Neji remembers, who has been forgiven a whole different kind of stupidity by someone who had all right to hate his guts forever. He got kicked to the floor, but he was offered a hand. That's why he was very confident in banning serious grudges from their friendship.

Until about ten months ago, if you will.

This is the point where Neji's thoughts are returned a mess far from rational, and while it is ridiculous how they've been awkward with one another for so long, it was time well-spent sorting and getting himself figured out, because something that simple and complicated at the same time is something someone as stubborn and denial-prone as Neji takes ten months to figure out. Remotely.

Hearing this will make you laugh, but Naruto is also the only person he has ever felt attracted to seriously enough to consider tapping it. Or letting it tap him. Poisitions, schmositions. Perhaps it's because Naruto is the person he has opened up to the most, though others were to follow later, but men and women alike haven't really pinged him. And he would know, his line of work is not exactly lacking in attractive people.

It took him these ten months to figure out that what made him sleep with Naruto can't have been solely physical attraction or looking for a worthy lay. He hates admitting this, because it makes things complicated, more than they already are, but Naruto is probably just who Neji needs in his life.

He's at a point where he's willing to disregard all things physical and mushy if only to return to their friendship, for this whole mancrush thing is only bound to ruin it. He knows, painfully begrudgingly knows that Naruto has too many intimacy issues that are good for one person, and for the longest time, Neji thought he himself was the one too stuck up to figure out what he wants. So while he doesn't know whether he could be wholly happy with it, he would do his best to try. Their friendship, after all, is something he views as more than he could have ever asked for.

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