Naruto Namikaze (microchipped) wrote,
@ 2009-10-14 21:48:00

Entry tags:

anonymous, being a bastard, ic, missy, text

oo6x
Halloween is on its way. The decorations are going up in the first district for all of the kids who still like that stuff. Pumpkins or whatever. The best restaurants in the first are coming out with all of their seasonal autumn stuff. I'm glad I can get a piece of pumpkin cheesecake whenever I want, or gourmet sweet potato soufflés. They're excellent.

And remember everyone, around this time of year we have lots of mischief going on, so set those alarms and park your car in the garage if you don't want to run the risk of it getting egged. October 30th is the big night, but some kids don't honor the date and start early every year.

I saw this girl selling homemade scarves at a kiosk in the mall hoping she could make a buck in lieu of the cold weather, but they were horribly made. People should just stick with things they're good at.

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	sakurablossom 2009-10-15 05:59 am UTC (link)
	I would never, ever, date boned. Ever. (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

	microchipped 2009-10-15 06:02 am UTC (link)
	You would only break plans with me to go out with him. (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

	sakurablossom 2009-10-15 06:06 am UTC (link)
	I was mad at you. (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

	microchipped 2009-10-15 06:10 am UTC (link)
	Now I'm mad at you. (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

	sakurablossom 2009-10-15 06:13 am UTC (link)
	You were already mad at me. (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

	microchipped 2009-10-15 06:15 am UTC (link)
	Yeah. (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

	[Private] sakurablossom 2009-10-15 06:24 am UTC (link)
	Hey, I... I said some things I shouldn't have. Even though I'm still kind of mad at you, I wanted to take back a lot of what I said the other night. (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

	Re: [Private] microchipped 2009-10-15 06:26 am UTC (link)
	Missy, don't. Okay? We shouldn't make up. I'm sorry for making this entry, that was stupid and wrong. I wanted to put more space between us, not resolve things. (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

	Re: [Private] sakurablossom 2009-10-15 06:33 am UTC (link)
	Well, you can act however you want, but I have to tell you I'm sorry. If you don't want to talk anymore, I'm not going to beg you. (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

Re: [Private]

microchipped
2009-10-15 06:38 am UTC (link)

I do. But remember when I told you being a brunette didn't matter to me? It does, and even if this is only online I can't continue to do this with you. I have feelings for you, and for anything to come of it would be illegal. It just can't happen, so I need to pull back.

A lot of things have been happening in both my personal and professional life that I find questionable. Whether you like or not, I'm a blond and I have to be a certain way. I've been trying for a long time to stop being emotional, and I'm losing a lot of ground lately. Too much rides on that for me to ignore it and let myself slip further.

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

Re: [Private]

sakurablossom
2009-10-15 07:19 am UTC (link)

Nothing's going to happen. I don't even know what you look like. ...Well, I've never seen your face.

You shouldn't force yourself to be someone you're not... I know you think I don't understand, but I don't want you to disappear in the sea of blonds. You're different than them, and you can't escape that. It was naive to have thought we wouldn't have problems with each other, but now we know.

But... I don't want you to get in trouble at work... so I think that means you need to stop worrying about it so much. I believe in you. ♥

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

Re: [Private]

microchipped
2009-10-15 06:21 pm UTC (link)

So it didn't mean that much to you, then? I'm not saying that to be insulting, I want to know.

I am different, but not for the reasons you think. I have a higher status and more control than most blonds, and I don't want to compromise that. It means everything to me.

I want to be your friend, but anything more than that and it becomes too painful. Thanks for understanding.

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

Re: [Private]

sakurablossom
2009-10-15 06:50 pm UTC (link)

I didn't say that. I just said nothing's going to happen, which it won't, because we're both responsible... but I do really like you. There's just not much risk involved since I hardly know anything about you.

If it meant everything to you, you would've stopped talking to me when you found out I was brunette.

I do understand... So long as we can keep talking, it's fine with me.

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

Re: [Private]

microchipped
2009-10-15 10:27 pm UTC (link)

All my life I've been taught to put business first, and that to do so I need to control my emotions, even ignore them for the greater good, especially because of my profession. I believed that, but I had only understood why in theory.

Online, being anonymous, it's easy to be more like who I feel I am inside. And with you, for the first time, I was sharing that part of me and it felt great. I was learning how to feel, and feel very good. But that doesn't come without cost, and I guess I began to fall in love with you, if that's the phrase.

This wouldn't be okay even if you were blonde, but you being a brunette complicates it more. I've realized that embracing this and investing more and more into these feelings would undo everything I've tried hard to achieve. I understand now that emotions make it difficult to place work and business as the first priority. And that me liking you was having an effect on how I saw other brunets. The law needs to be my guideline, not my morals.

I know you said you understand already, but I owe you that explanation. As a brunette you might find it insulting for someone to choose their job over you, but that's what I have to do as a blond.

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

	Re: [Private] sakurablossom 2009-10-15 10:51 pm UTC (link)
	That phrase is really special, okay?? You can't just say it lightly! It's insulting... but it's not like I was ever really an option, no matter how we feel. So that makes it less insulting than if you were a brunet saying that to me. ...You wouldn't get a wife as a gift, would you? Blonde women aren't just there to be trophy wives and have babies... right? (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

	boned 2009-10-15 06:04 am UTC (link)
	You would be lucky to date me (Reply to this)(Parent)

	boned 2009-10-15 06:14 am UTC (link)
	No okay seriously what is wrong with dating me! (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

	sakurablossom 2009-10-15 06:16 am UTC (link)
	Can we maybe have this conversation somewhere else and some other time? (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

	boned 2009-10-15 06:17 am UTC (link)
	Kinda hate to break it to you but uh, your secret is out? And this guy knows that we didn't go on a date, so. (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

	sakurablossom 2009-10-15 06:18 am UTC (link)
	God I know that. Thank you for spelling it out again. (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

	boned 2009-10-15 06:20 am UTC (link)
	Yeah but look see I am also telling him he's a dick cuz he is (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

	sakurablossom 2009-10-15 06:36 am UTC (link)
	Do not say "cuz" and while I kind of appreciate you sticking up for me your timing is just so bad! (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

	boned 2009-10-15 06:40 am UTC (link)
	FINE I just won't stick up for you ever again, freaking ungrateful. (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

	sakurablossom 2009-10-15 07:20 am UTC (link)
	Who wants free lunch this weekend! (Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

	boned 2009-10-15 07:23 am UTC (link)
	I DO (Reply to this)(Parent)