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Alfred F. Jones ([info]alfredfjones) wrote,
@ 2009-12-20 02:24:00


Previous Entry  Add to memories!  Tell a Friend!  Next Entry
Entry tags:hetalia, roleplay

Breaking and Entering
    Alfred F. Jones was a hero.  Not only was he a hero, but he was the U. S. Of A.  That made him the hero of all heros.  No feat should be impossible for him.  Sadly, he may have found a foe he could not defeat. 

    Right in front of Alfred was a very thickly made door.  That door belonged to a beautiful English cottage.  That cottage belonged to Arthur Kirkland.  Alfred had a key in his hands.  It was supposed to be for this door, but the key wouldn’t work.  He knew it should work.  He had used the key before.  

    It had taken him a lot of hard work to get Arthur’s key and make a duplicate without him noticing.  He had made Matthew pretend to be him while Alfred had taken the drunken nation’s key and made a copy of it.  It had taken an enormous amount or bribery, persuasion and good old fashioned American charm to get the dead done.

    America in the end sighed to himself.  It was well before dawn and he didn’t want to wake the crabby old man so early, it would put him in an even worse mood then normal.  This meant that he would have to use his old method of getting inside.

    Alfred quickly walked around to the side and began to quickly climb a tree with practiced ease.  When he was a good thirty feet up he began to edge slowly onto a thick branch.  The zipper on his bomber jacket made little pinging noises.  When he was as far out as he dared, he leapt.  For a second he was flying though the air.  The next second he was crashed into the wall of the house and holding on desperately to a windowsill.  His feet madly scrabbled for the almost invisible footholds he needed.  The second he had his toes on something he began to pull himself up.

    The windowsill was thick and could take his weight.  The window itself was broken and could not be closed all the way.  Now that he wasn’t in danger of falling he was easily able to push the window open as he pulled himself up, over the sill and he rolled into the third floor room.



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[info]arthurkirkland
2009-12-20 07:29 pm UTC (link)
While it wasn't an everyday thing for him, Arthur Kirkland sometimes found himself awake much earlier than intended, and would use the time to cherish the few hours of silence he would have -- especially if there was to be a meeting between nations that day. He couldn't think of many better ways to start the morning than with a hot cup of tea and a fine book, and so he had selected an interesting volume from his personal library, brewed some leaves, and found a chair to sit in where the sunlight would be cast upon the book pages at sunrise.

He had just begun to relax and settled into a particularly engaging paragraph when a faint noise from upstairs rattled him. He was quite sure the cottage was empty, apart from himself, so he disregarded it as the house settling--until he heard it yet again. England lowered his book slowly, stood, and walked over to the staircase. He looked up, awaiting a further sound for a moment, before finally deciding to investigate.

Arthur grabbed the broom from the kitchen as a precaution, then quietly began up the stairs, hoping slightly that at the worst, it would be mice.

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[info]alfredfjones
2009-12-20 08:54 pm UTC (link)
A familiar weight was missing from America’s face. He began to blindly grope around in the dark room. Finally, his fingers circled around his glasses. When they were brought back to perch on his face the room went from dark and blurry to just dark.

Slowly he got up and began to feel his way around the room. Alfred was trying to be as quiet as he possibly could. However, it seemed like things had been put in this room for the express purpose for tripping him. First, he stepped in a half full bucket of water. America jumped by reflex and began trying to kick off the offending bucket. The bucket came off and flew into the darkness. He heard the crash as it hit something. Then he tripped over an old sea chest. His hands shot in front of him to try and break his fall, they managed to knock over a cardboard box. The box had been full of various books and they spilled all over the floor. When Alfred had gotten up again he slipped on one of the books and crashed through the door of the storage room.

America’s journey was not over yet. Disoriented, he tripped over another, smaller box that had been outside of the room. Sadly, he was right next to the stairs that led down to the second floor. As he feel it seemed like he hit every stair and managed to hit his head on the railing at least once. Finally, Alfred caught a break and landed on something soft. Looking down, he saw that it was some laundry.
America looked like a mess. His suit was filthy from his little adventure to get inside. There was dust all over him, leaves were stuck to his hair and one pants leg was dripping wet. His bomber jacket had taken some of the worst for his suit jacket, but despite that it was still filthy. Alfred did not notice the condition of his clothing at all.

Instead, he looked up, and seeing Arthur there on the second floor, America gave a goofy grin. He didn’t seem to think anything of breaking and entering into the house.

“G’mornin’ England. Have any coffee?”

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[info]arthurkirkland
2009-12-20 10:45 pm UTC (link)
Only a few steps up, the clatter became loud enough that England didn't have to worry about being quiet, and began a running march up the remainder of the stairs, holding the broomstick defensively, ready to strike whatever he would happen upon.

He was not, however, expecting to happen upon the sight of Alfred F. Jones tumbling haplessly down the second stairway that lead to the top level. As he finally settled down in a pile of laundry, it was all Arthur could do to stare, trying hard to comprehend what had just happened. The young man was a horrid mess, and it seemed the only thing Arthur could piece together was that he had been trespassing, for . . . whatever reason. His innocent question merely made it worse.

"What . . ." England took a deep breath, his grip on the broomstick tightening as his urge to use it became almost overwhelming. "What are you doing . . . in my . . . house, America . . . ?"

(Reply to this)(Thread)


[info]alfredfjones
2009-12-20 11:01 pm UTC (link)
“Hey, I did used to live here too, y’know,” he said as he picked himself and brushed some leaves off. “And I do have a very good reason for being here.”

Alfred collected his thoughts and tried to figure out what would be the best way to explain. Every country took turns being responsible for catering the meetings. Today it was France’s turn. However, his caterer had suddenly had to cancel. So over the course of the past couple days Francis had been arranging to make this meeting a potlatch. Everyone was assigned to bring a certain type of food (America was one of the ones bringing desserts). However, only last night had Matthew called Alfred to tell him that none of the e-mails had Arthur listed as a recipient. Actually, England had been the only country not assigned to bring anything on the list. To avoid war between England and France, Canada had asked America to help England get something ready to take to the potlatch. The plan had been to sneak in and make some cookies for England to bring while the older nation was still asleep.

“I came to use your kitchen to bake cookies for you to bring to the meeting so we don’t get food poisoning from your awful cooking and so you don’t kill Francis cause he didn’t tell you the meeting was going to have a potlatch. So can you put the broom down already?”

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[info]arthurkirkland
2009-12-20 11:31 pm UTC (link)
"Then say it already," England said sternly, ignoring Alfred's first comment; it left a slight unease in him. He had wanted to say that even if he had, he had given up the right to come barging in whenever he bloody well wanted, but decided to be quiet and let America speak. Though, as he listened to the explanation, being gracious suddenly didn't seem like a very good idea.

"Oh, so I don't kill France? Kill France?" England laughed momentarily, before his voice became an angry yell. "I'll kill you!"

He threw the broomstick to the floor in frustration, staring America squarely in the eyes, his own narrowing. He slowly walked toward America as he spoke, lowering his voice and trying hard to keep it even. "Right, allow me to get this correct. This meeting became a potlatch, France didn't want me to bring anything, so no one told me about this change, and to top it off, you break into my house to--" Arthur froze, a mere few steps away from Alfred, and his expression softened. "To make something for me to bring?"

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)


[info]alfredfjones
2009-12-21 12:04 am UTC (link)
“Right. Matty and I were supposed to bring the deserts, so we thought we might as well do the same for you. He was bringing ice cream and I made pies. Now, excuse the hero...” America began to walk past England so that he could go downstairs and get to the kitchen. He was whistling Dixie.

America was not the best cook in the world. He also wasn’t the worst. He couldn’t make the kind of fancy meals that France or Japan could, but he could make casseroles, cookies, hamburgers, etc. Basically, he could make American food. Cookies also happened to be simple enough that both brothers thought that England would have the ingredients already. Though if worst comes to worst, Canada was on standby to pick up any groceries.

America yawned. He didn’t get much sleep last night.

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[info]arthurkirkland
2009-12-21 12:28 am UTC (link)
Arthur allowed Alfred to walk past him, still feeling at a loss as to what he should feel. On the one hand, he wanted nothing more than to throttle the lot of them for having the nerve to exclude him from important events such as these, but on the other hand, America's oddly kind act made him feel a small bit of hope for the otherwise arrogant teenager.

With a sigh, England turned around and walked downstairs, picking up his tea before stepping into the kitchen, observing America closely for a moment. He finally resolved that it would be most logical and beneficial to let America do something nice for once, so he would let that one go--not for France, though. He was in trouble.

After a few moments of standing a bit awkwardly, Arthur finally spoke up again. "Hey, um . . . do you want my help with anything, Alfred?"

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]alfredfjones, 2009-12-21 12:42 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]arthurkirkland, 2009-12-21 01:10 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]alfredfjones, 2009-12-21 01:29 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]arthurkirkland, 2009-12-21 02:01 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]alfredfjones, 2009-12-21 02:18 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]arthurkirkland, 2009-12-21 02:37 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]alfredfjones, 2009-12-21 02:48 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]arthurkirkland, 2009-12-21 03:00 am UTC

[info]alfredfjones
2009-12-21 03:08 am UTC (link)
“I’m not tired... but I could sit down for a few minutes.” America fell onto a couch, making it just as filthy as his suit in the process. He blinked once and then twice. Without even realizing it he fell asleep. Alfred had been tired to the point that he had left his beloved bomber jacket in the kitchen.

As he slept he dreamed of pies. There were so many of them and they would not stop multiplying. They began to chase him through his dreams. Eventually he took refuge in a gingerbread castle.

(Reply to this)(Thread)


[info]arthurkirkland
2009-12-21 03:30 am UTC (link)
England found himself more relieved than he had expected of himself to see America asleep on the couch, despite the washing that would have to be done later. He did know that America was no longer a child, and knew perhaps a bit too well that he could fend for himself just splendidly, but he still felt like he had to keep an eye on him nonetheless sometimes.

To prolong Alfred's nap, Arthur made sure to wash his hair twice in the shower, spent extra time putting his uniform and lapels on, finished cleaning the mess in the kitchen, and made himself another cup of tea before picking up the bomber jacket and taking a seat in the chair adjacent to the sofa that America was asleep on, lying the jacket on his lap. Amazingly, it was still quite clean.

Checking the clock, England decided they had enough time for him to allow the nap to last another ten minutes, and so he sat drinking his tea, enjoying not only the silence, but America's soft breathing as well. It was a rare thing to hear, the sound of America being calm, especially now that such a high wall had been built between them. Arthur looked over at Alfred, unable to suppress a smile at the sight. He may not have been a child, but he still had his adorable moments.

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[info]alfredfjones
2009-12-21 03:44 am UTC (link)
“‘nother hamburger, please,” America murmured in his sleep. He was smiling because in his dreams the Gingerbread King was giving him all the hamburgers he could eat for saving them from the Communist Zombie Pies.

In his dreams he heard a noise. After a second it cleared up and he recognized it as Yankee Doodle. Wait, it was his cell phone. Just barely awake enough, he dug in his pocket and pulled out his phone. He heard a voice screaming at him in French accented English. After hearing his ring tone, his half asleep mind could only decide on one thing.

“Oh, hi La Fayette. Didn’t you die? Jackson gave you a really nice funeral,” on the other end Francis was screaming at him.

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)


[info]arthurkirkland
2009-12-21 03:58 am UTC (link)
Arthur's smiled quickly turned into a frown as he listened to America's sleepy murmuring, and the yelling on the other line. With a sigh and shake of his head, he put his empty cup down and reached over to shake Alfred into wakefulness. "Wake up. Francis is screaming at you."

England stood, picking up the bomber jacket as he did so. France only sounded more and more irritated as the seconds passed, so he tried to think of a simpler way to wake the tired young man. "Oy, er, I'll buy you as many hamburgers as you can eat if you get up right now. Come on."

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[info]alfredfjones
2009-12-21 04:07 am UTC (link)
That last comment from Arthur woke Alfred up completely.

“Oh, France... Yeah, sorry I’m not there to help set up... I fell asleep at England’s... Tell him about the potlatch? Of course I did... Yeah, he made cookies.” France was silent. Alfred could hear him breathing so he knew that the other hadn’t hung up. A second later the line went dead. Alfred would admit he was being just the tiniest bit petty. But, Francis had interrupted a dream involving hamburgers and that was a horrible crime in his mind.

Alfred held out his hand, “I’d like my jacket back please. And I’d prefer McDonald’s.” America glanced at the clock. “You grab the cookies and I’ll go turn on the car.”

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]arthurkirkland, 2009-12-21 04:31 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]alfredfjones, 2009-12-21 04:41 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]arthurkirkland, 2009-12-21 05:07 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]alfredfjones, 2009-12-21 05:20 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]arthurkirkland, 2009-12-21 07:38 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]alfredfjones, 2009-12-21 07:50 am UTC

[info]arthurkirkland
2009-12-21 07:52 pm UTC (link)
"Good morning, Lili," England replied as he stood and dusted his suit off, regaining his composure. He glanced down at America a moment, but it was a very short moment, as America was already out of the car almost as soon as he had opened his eyes.

Hiding a smile, Arthur walked to the back of the car and nodded. "Of course I am." He held out his arms to take some pies, while giving a polite smile to Liechtenstein. "How was the game?"

(Reply to this)(Thread)


[info]alfredfjones
2009-12-21 10:51 pm UTC (link)
America began to load England down with pies. He was giving the older man more pies then he had the young girl.

“Big brother won’t let me play the game too. But Canada’s team is beating Russia’s right now.”

“Matty is playing? Awesome! I’ll have to join in once we get all these pies inside,” America was carrying at least a good eight or nine pies himself as he began to walk to the entrance. France must have heard them coming, because he was standing at the entrance.

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)


[info]arthurkirkland
2009-12-22 07:51 am UTC (link)
"I'm not surprised Matthew's winning," England commented as he watched the pies stack up. He was a bit surprised to pick up the scent of a couple mincemeat pies, though the abundance of apple came as no shock.

He turned around and followed Lili and Alfred, having to look around the pies to see properly. The sight of Francis awaiting them was not one he wanted to see, however, and--mostly for innocent Liechtenstein's sake--averted his glare. He still wanted to throttle France, but managed to walk past him and ignore him for the time being.

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)


[info]alfredfjones
2009-12-22 08:19 am UTC (link)
Alfred was practically running, trying to get all the pies inside as fast as possible. He did not want to miss out on a hockey game, especially when there was a chance of watching his brother beat up Russia. In about five minutes all the pies were stacked on the dessert table. About half the pies were apple pie. Though to be fair, they were not all plain apple pie. There were variations there. The pies were not perfect. Some pies were a little burned. A few did not have their crusts quite thick enough to keep from falling apart. Almost every pie had something wrong with it, no matter how little. The only pie there that could be called perfect was one of the mince meat pies. All together, the pies came out surprisingly well for someone that learned to cook from Arthur Kirkland.

America ignored the looks that France gave him as he brushed past and out the door, removing. He waved a greeting to his brother and traded places with North Italy. His suit was going to go through a whole new level of abuse.

France was really only mildly annoyed with America. It was his eternal rival he was more interested at picking at.

“Mon Angelterre, I am so sorry I didn’t tell you about the change to potlatch. It is such a good thing that young America told you. I’m absolutely dying to see the cookies you brought.” Everything was said in such a nice and friendly way that Lili would not pick up on what was really being said.

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)


[info]arthurkirkland
2009-12-23 01:14 am UTC (link)
It was only after the pies had been piled neatly at America's table (an entire long one had to be used just to hold all the baked goods he had brought) that England graced France with a reply, through a forcedly kind and courteous tone.

"Ah, of course you are." England put on a thin smile, holding up the bag of cookies that had been the last thing he took out of the car. "Why don't you have the first one, my friend? Here you are." Arthur's thin smile became much more sincere as he handed one of the sugar cookies to Francis.

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]alfredfjones, 2009-12-23 01:55 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]arthurkirkland, 2009-12-23 06:01 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]alfredfjones, 2009-12-23 06:15 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]arthurkirkland, 2009-12-23 06:47 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]alfredfjones, 2009-12-23 06:59 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]arthurkirkland, 2009-12-23 07:34 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]alfredfjones, 2009-12-23 07:49 am UTC

[info]arthurkirkland
2009-12-23 08:23 am UTC (link)
"Oh, so this was all your bloody fault." England sat the chair upright, finally giving France the dirty glare he'd been saving all day. He gave a scoff. "I wouldn't buy anything for you, you moronic French scum."

Without a second thought, Arthur grabbed Francis' hands and slammed the pies into his face, then used the moment of Francis' shock to quickly drag America into the coat room. He leaned back against the door, knowing France would be after him shortly, looking around for something to bar the door with.

He came across an empty coat hanger and positioned it against the knob, then leaned back again and sighed, looking up at the sleeping Alfred. "You'd better be sleeping well."

(Reply to this)(Thread)


[info]alfredfjones
2009-12-23 07:07 pm UTC (link)
Francis had been planning on using the pies on England. He had not expected them to be smashed into his own face. When the momentary shock wore off, he ran after England. The other nation ran into the coat room, dragging the still sleeping America with him.

France tried to open the door. It was not opening. He thought about his options. England would have to come out eventually. He could wait for that to happen or he could try and goad England out. Goading sounded like the better plan.

“My, my, if I had known you wanted to have a secret tryst with Amerique, I would have recommended some place a bit more romantic then a coat room. Though it is usually in good manners to wake your partner up before said tryst. Or is that the only way to get someone to go out with you?”

It did not matter to France that he was making stuff up. What mattered was getting England angry enough that he would get out of that room.

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)


[info]arthurkirkland
2009-12-23 08:05 pm UTC (link)
"A . . . secret . . . tryst?"

Arthur liked to think through his actions and words before doing and or saying them, but anger would prevent such carefully thought-out things from happening. To suggest that England would want to do such things to--or with--America, or that he was desperate enough, was all France needed to get the door flung open.

"I am not that desperate!" He screamed as he grabbed Francis by the neck, suddenly forgetting he was easily heard by the other nations, or that he could easily wake Alfred.

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)


[info]alfredfjones
2009-12-23 09:23 pm UTC (link)
All out fights weren’t France’s usual style. Right now he was willing to make an exception. The two fought back and forth. America was still sleeping in the chair, his chin resting on his chest.

Back in the food fight, Canada and Russia had finished their pies. Matthew had decided now was a good time to leave. Ivan had nodded in agreement and followed. The two were low crawling beneath the tables, chairs and flying food. At one point Austria and Australia came crashing over a table and almost landed on the two. Matthew probably should have stopped to help his fellow member of the Commonwealth of Nations, but he was more interested in getting out of here.

Canada finally got to his feet when he was through the door. Russia was still following him. He was getting worried about just how far the Russian was going to keep following him. Ivan might be relatively sane at the moment, but no one knew when he was going to start drifting off into insanity again.

Matthew was walking down the hallway and when he turned a corner he suddenly stopped. There were England and France, trying to kill each other.

“Wh-what are you two doing?”

“England and France are very close, da?”

“And why is Alfred sleeping in a coat room?” Canada was now very serious. He was standing there with his hands on his waist. Russia was not looking any more threatening then normal, but considering he was Russia, that still meant he seemed pretty scary.

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)


[info]arthurkirkland
2009-12-24 01:47 am UTC (link)
Though their fight was intense and quite painful, England and France were still able to hear Canada's shocked voice over the sound of one another's choking, and they both froze in place for a moment. England shoved France away from him and cleared his throat, then smoothed out his clothes as if nothing had ever happened.

"I didn't want your brother to become an even bigger mess than he already is," Arthur explained to Matthew calmly, "so I put him somewhere safe. France had him up all night baking pies."

"That's too bad," Ivan commented, though still smiling. "Most of the pies are on the floor and over everyone now." As he said this, he looked at Canada with a laugh. Matthew . . . wasn't sure how to take it, so he just smiled back; better not to upset Russia.

"Is that nonsense still going on?" Arthur asked with a scoff, as if he were above such childish activities.

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)

(no subject) - [info]alfredfjones, 2009-12-24 02:14 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]arthurkirkland, 2009-12-24 02:32 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]alfredfjones, 2009-12-24 02:48 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]arthurkirkland, 2009-12-24 03:23 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]alfredfjones, 2009-12-24 03:34 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]arthurkirkland, 2009-12-24 04:08 am UTC

[info]alfredfjones
2009-12-24 04:30 am UTC (link)
America was not really sure what was going on or what France meant. But, Alfred was a hero and so he always had to do the heroic thing. He grabbed England by the back of his jacket, pulled him off of France and then tackled him to the ground. He was using both his strength and weight to keep the island nation on the ground.

“Francis, I think you should leave now.” As France left for real this time, America tightened his hold. “It is just a pie,” trying to calm him down. “It’ll come off and your clothing will be just fine. So stop it, will ya? I’m not letting you up until you calm down.”

Alfred was sad. He had somewhat wanted Arthur to try the pie. It wasn’t because he wanted Arthur to like it, he just wanted to show him what good cooking was like. Despite the pie, it was seeing Arthur act like this that really bothered him. Even after the American Revolution he had still looked up to England. However, in the first World War he had seen England’s drunken side and he had seen the petty bickering between England and France that he hadn’t been aware of before. Both made him feel like the person that he had known as a child had never really existed in the first place.

(Reply to this)(Thread)


[info]arthurkirkland
2009-12-24 04:48 am UTC (link)
England exhaled slowly. He suddenly felt ashamed of his reckless actions. Even though he tried to keep his composure and appear calm and in control of things, his emotions always wound up getting the best of him. Anger, disappointment, heartbreak; it always got the best of him.

"I'm sorry," Arthur mumbled. He couldn't bring himself to look at Alfred. He didn't want to admit that it wasn't the stain that had upset him. He tried to think of something to say to add to the apology, but there was nothing to say. He was tired, he was upset, and he hated that America was right.

He managed to fish out the car keys from his pocket even under America's hold, pushing them aside. He wasn't sure he could manage to control a vehicle just then. "Here, you drive home. Can I sit up now, please?"

(Reply to this)(Parent)(Thread)


[info]alfredfjones
2009-12-24 04:55 am UTC (link)
America took the keys and let England stand up.

“Don’t worry about it. Someone once told me: idiots never have to apologize for their actions.” America laughed as he walked out the door and to the car. He wondered how long it would take Arthur to remember that the person who said that had been Arthur himself when talking about America.

(Reply to this)(Parent)




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