Texts from Friday

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Hey, Merry Christmas. I hope yours is better than mine.. girls kind of suck lol.. anyway, are you going to Hunter and Michiko's party tomorrow maybe? I don't want to go alone and I don't want to drag down Ella and Hen-

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Well Merry Christmas to you too blondie ;) What do you mean, girls suck? That Sera kid didn't fuck with you did she? I was thinking of crashin' it! lol. I don't think they care for Lexi and I much. I could definitely be swayed if I knew a certain blonde bombshell was going to be there...

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Just girl drama. Sera and I are.. not really a thing anymore. I guess. I just feel weird, like.. we have all the same friends and stuff. It's hard. That's why I wasn't even going to go at all honestly lol.. I don't know. If you're going with Alexandria though, that's fine. I should probably stay home anyway, Mack and Hunter and them were her friends first.

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Woah, as in like, you guys broke it off??? You okay little Jay? :( Well, it's not like I don't go everywhere with Alexandria. You want to um...like, be my date and go? Lexi and I are just friends you know...It'd be kind of cool to have someone to kiss at midnight

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Yeah we did.. and no I'm not honestly. I don't know what to do, I just can't stop thinking about her, I know that's so whiny and dopey but it's just hard. We like spent all our time together for the last like, two years.. I dunno. But uh your date? I really shouldn't- Sure, I guess. If you're sure I'm not intruding. I just don't know who else I can talk to, you know? Everyone is like, a friend of hers. Not that I want to talk bad about her. But I do. I don't know anymore.

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Oh Jen, I'm sorry :( <3 If you ever need to get away, you're welcome at my place. My brother and sister are twins, did you know? I'm sure they'd love to meet you. My Ma makes some pretty awesome Christmas cookies too! Sometimes you have to let your feelings out, even if they're bad ones. It's better than keeping it all inside.

You're not intruding in the slightest, don't worry. Uh...Lex might say some things but that's just how she is. I don't think she'll mean harm by it.

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You're really sweet, did you know that? You deserve better than you get. And wow, like fraternal twins? Like Sera's brother and sister- I might as well come over if you really don't care.. I'm already tired of sitting in my room, but I don't feel like I can even make myself leave. I'm just so tired and blah.

I guess, if you're sure. I probably won't stay late though! And I still don't drink. :)

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Aw, you're pretty sweet yourself blondie! They're actually identical like you and Ella. 'Cept their easier to tell apart lol. Like I said, you're always welcome. I'm sure the twins would be excited to play Wii with you, they got tired of playing Lex and I when we kept beating them.

Positive. I'll even escort you home after, kay? You still don't?? You're such a good girl Jen!

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Haha, I'm definitely not good at video games at like all but I play a mean Scrabble? Or Pictionary! Or is that too boring? I liked Scrabble when I was little!

I guess I might as well go lol it couldn't hurt to get outside. I just feel like it might. I don't know if I can see her there- Never ever! I'm not opposed to uh cigarettes though lol if you have any.

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Wii is pretty easy Jen! :) I'll teach you how to play. I'd play Scrabble with you too, can't say I'm very good at it, but I'll try! The twins are a bit young, or at least a bit too hyper. Little you sounds like a bookworm though ;) Figured you'd always been a smart gal.

It's always best to just pull the band aid off real quick, ya know? Hurts less I guess. So, you're tellin' me you'd rather wreck your lungs? Tsk! You should know better little Jay! (I do have cigarettes, though, I don't know if I could give them to a cutie like you. It'd be like shooting a deer...although seeing a good girl like yourself smoke would be pretty hot)

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You're going to come to Hunter's party or whatever tomorrow, aren't you?

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Yeah I guess so. I gotta get out of this hell hole for a bit anyway.

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Yeah. Just behave until then, okay? Don't do anything else rash-

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Yeah I will. Mack and Hunter and them don't hate me right? You don't think? Like for breaking things off with Jenny? I just didn't know what else to do Tatum you should have just let me come with you

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Why would they hate you?? You're their friend or whatever, they like you for some reason. :p And uhm yeah you don't have to justify panic to me. especially dad panic.. my dad panic kind of started this whole mess, remember? That was kind of mean though, I bet you go to hell for making Parrys cry-

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Because I'm stupid and a hypocrite and I tell everyone else what to do and always talk about doing the right and then I do this. I just couldn't though. He just can't.. like if you could wouldn't you want to take it all back .. he has his faults but he's still our dad. I'm just don't know if I can throw that away forever.

I can just find a guy and be happy I guess.. it's different he never has to find out. I just miss her soo much though I don't know what to do with myself

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I don't know. I guess I should want to take it back but I feel like idek.. like a new person? Like I can actually breathe? As long as I don't think about everything.. I mean, like about him and stuff. I'm not sorry he knows. He has to know because I can't hide forever. I'm scared of everyone I shouldn't have to be afraid of dad and I'm not anymore.

And I'm not telling you what to do cause obviously you're not gonna listen but can I just veto this find yourself a boy and try to suffer through?? Cause fyi, years of experience speaking here and all, but it doesn't work. You might think boys are cute but you're about as bi as Elton John in the 70s I think-

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