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What Is Your Battle Cry?
Zang! Who is that, stalking across the fields! It is Anya, hands clutching a burning branch! And with a vengeful bellow, her voice cometh:
"In the name of Thor the Mighty, I come like a storm and lay waste like a hurricane!"
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Hark! Who is that, stalking through the tarmac! It is Tyson, hands clutching a reflective halberd! And with a spectacular cry, his voice cometh:
"Blood and souls for my dark lord! I carve into flesh with God on my side!"
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Prowling out of the cliffs, carrying a bladed baseball bat, cometh Arica! And she gives an ominous roar:
"I'm going to flog you beyond your expiration date, and launch you into deep space!!"
Striding amidst the desert, clutching two hardened pitas, cometh Mu! And he gives a low cry:
"As sure as predators devour prey, I bring annihilation and cheap beer!"
Skulking through the terrain, wielding a studded crowbar, cometh Steven! And he gives a booming bellow:
"Ares, God of War, be praised! I shall make bloody music with your nation's populace!!!"
Yea, verily: Who is that, skulking through the icy wasteland! It is Daniel, hands clutching a jeweled meat hammer! And with an ominous cry, his voice cometh:
"I'm going to cram objects into you from every conceivable angle!!"
Lo! Who is that, striding over the cliffs! It is Sylvia, hands clutching a burning branch! She screams vengefully:
"I'm going to brutalize you into the fourth dimension, and plunge you into financial ruin!"
Sprinting across the tundra, clutching a bladed baseball bat, cometh Jordan! And he gives an ominous cry:
"I'm going to spank you so utterly, you'll age fifty years!!!"
Hark! Who is that, prowling out of the tarmac! It is Kalypso, hands clutching a sharpened screwdriver! She howls homicidally:
"I'm going to brutalize you until you spontaneously degenerate!"
Running on the tundra, clutching a mighty sword, cometh Jay! And he gives a bloodthirsty howl:
"I'm going to contort you into a new dimension of pain!!"
Zang! Who is that, running amidst the desert! It is Sarah, hands clutching a studded crowbar! And with a spectacular howl, her voice cometh:
"For the love of carnage and discord, I tear into the enemy with reckless abandon!!!"
Zang! Who is that, striding amidst the freeway! It is Arthur, hands clutching buzzsaw hand extensions! He bellows mightily:
"I'm going to spank you until you are hot and bothered, and launch you into deep space!!"
Running along the mountains, swinging a meaty axe, cometh Justin! And he gives an ominous howl:
"I'm going to spank you backwards in time!"
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Stalking along the candy store, cutting down all who dare stand in the way using a jeweled meat hammer, cometh Andy! And he gives a spectacular cry:
"I'm going to hack into your brain, and type FORMAT C: !"
Running along the fields, clutching gilded boxing gloves, cometh Cassidy! And he gives a booming grunt:
"I'm seriously going to punch you all the way to Wienerwald, and plug you into a power plant!"
Skulking across the tarmac, carrying a studded crowbar, cometh Donovan! And he gives a booming bellow:
"You in some shit now, muhfuh! No flesh shall be spared!"
Yea, verily: Who is that, skulking across the candy store! It is Joey, hands clutching a sharpened screwdriver! He howls thunderously:
"I'm going to fuck you into the stuff of nightmares, then make toast!!"
Rampaging across the steppes, cutting down all who dare stand in the way using a thorned whip, cometh Melissa! And she gives a spectacular roar:
"I'm going to pulverize you until you're a parapalegic, and add a notch to my bedpost!!"
Striding across the tarmac, attacking with a reflective halberd, cometh Robert! And he gives an ominous howl:
"I'm going to forcibly reverse your gender!!"
Yea, verily: Who is that, prowling on the hotel lobby! It is Angela, hands clutching a bladed baseball bat! She cries apocalyptically:
"I'm going to flog you into the stuff of nightmares!!"
Who is that, stalking across the mountains! It is Dallas, hands clutching a sharpened screwdriver! And with a vengeful cry, his voice cometh:
"I'm going to make you cry like the bitchiest bitch!"
Who is that, skulking over the steppes! It is Mitzi, hands clutching a burning branch! She bellows thunderously:
"I'm going to pulverize you into the fourth dimension, and throw you out the window!"
Rampaging amidst the desert, clutching a mighty sword, cometh Jai! And he gives a low scream:
"I'm going to hump you so thoroughly, your blood will flow counter-clockwise!!!"
Who is that, striding along the hotel lobby! It is Cerdian, hands clutching a studded crowbar! He screams homicidally:
"I'm going to smash you like it's a new extreme sport, and launch you into deep space!!!"
Skulking out of the icy wasteland, carrying a sharpened screwdriver, cometh Kieran! And he gives a spectacular bellow:
"I'm going to smash you so hard, your blood will flow counter-clockwise!!!"
Hark! Who is that, sprinting along the freeway! It is Aaron, hands clutching a meaty axe! And with a mighty cry, his voice cometh:
"I'm going to fuck you until you're bright blue, and hijack your momma's airplane!"
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